From Love to No Love – What Happened to Us

In another five days, it would be the second year anniversary for Fann and Stuart.

But they haven’t seen each other for a week already.

Stuart had a bad cold last weekend, Fann went over to visit with breakfast and some drugstore medicine. The moment she opened the door, the sight of a just awakened Stuart gaming in his pyjamas greeted her. Right away, a surge of anger came over her.

Fann put the toasts on his keyboard, "eat it before it turns cold."

Stuart didn’t even move his eyes, just patronisingly answered, “yea sure, soon”.

Fann took off her coat, went to boil some water and told Stuart again to stop playing for a while, change his clothes, and to put some food into his stomach so that he can take the medicine. Stuart took the glance at the medicine that she bought home, saying "Hey that’s for influenza, not for cold. You know what, let me go get it online”, and then pulled out his phone.

The heater was on but somehow Fann felt cold. She pointed at the toasts and said, “Are you eating that or not? If you’re not, just throw it away.”

Stuart looked up to Fann. Nothing but coldness in his eyes. Fann picked up the toasts and walked out, Stuart didn’t even lift a finger to stop her.

Fann of course didn’t really throw the toasts out, she stopped just outside the door, waiting for Stuart to come out to “stop” her.

Stuart didn’t come out, when she returned, he was back in bed and using his phone on the bed absentmindedly.

Fann felt like a player who just got benched. Unappreciated and unneeded. The room temperature seemed to drop a notch, but it was the silence that was getting intolerable. She got her coat again. “Since you don’t need the breakfast that I’ve gotten for you, and you can get your own medicine online too, then I guess I shouldn’t be bothering you further”, she said.

This time she made it fast. Took her bag, put the toast back to his table, and slammed the door on her way out.

The elevator came and left, came and left. Stuart, again, did not come out to find her.

She almost wanted to laugh at herself. After the third time, she finally walked into the elevator.

In the past two years, such episode did happened before. It’s just that it’s either Stuart would come looking for her right away, or would call her soon after to apologise.

Fann felt hurt, felt unappreciated, felt unloved. She didn’t even check her phone on the way home, he won’t call or text her. That she already knew.

The moment she reached home, she went into her bed. That warmth was what she needed, and hopefully it could reach her heart too. She tried to sleep, tried to bring her head away from thinking why Stuart was so cold to her…

On the other hand, Stuart was staring blankly at his door. Fann had slammed the door too hard, such that a thin layer of dirt had fallen onto the floor. He was hungry, but suddenly had no appetite. Soon after Fann left, someone knocked on the door. He thought she came back, but it’s just the delivery man from the online pharmacy store. He gave him a smile and wished him speedy recovery.

It felt nice that even a stranger could be so kind to him. Stuart gave him a 5-star right after he closed the door. Why couldn’t Fann be a little more patient towards him? Why must she show her concern in such a bossy and hostile manner? Just because he chose to do a little gaming to distract himself from the headache, and she had to feel unappreciated??

Previously every time Fann came around, Stuart took extra effort to tidy the house and make her comfortable.

This time, he was just too tired and sick. She knew that, and yet she chose to storm away. She didn’t even notice that the room was cold because the heater was having problem again.

But Stuart could feel it was more than the heater that was broken, something else seemed broken between them. In his imagination, Fann would be crawling into bed with him and they would just snuggled up on this sick Sunday..

Unfortunately the truth was far from that. Little did he know that Fann was under her own blanket fighting back her tears.

The sun was so warm outside, but it just furthered the contrast for Fann. She felt like everything was falling apart. She wanted and needed a hug, just one. Why couldn’t he just say the three words – “Please don’t go”.

It was two in the afternoon when Fann finally decided to call Stuart. He didn’t answered. Something flipped in Fann’s heart and she turned off her phone.

Stuart saw the missed call after coming out from his shower. He called back and it’s the voice mail. He had never felt more tired than this moment in this relationship before.