Five problems With Social Media

It has been said before, but I will say it again. We are a people more connected then ever before, yet are all the lonelier for it. Social Media has opened a world of opportunity never before imagined. A chance for anyone to become something, to find an "out of the box" source of success that was never available to the previous generations.

But, it has such a dark, twisted side affect that so many people do not know how to avoid. If we even can.

It has given a space for such beautiful creations. For amazing, quirky souls to find an outlet for their creativity. There is so much good about it, but I feel it is being grossly abused. Though, of little, to no, fault of the people who use it.

I know when I got my first Iphone, I think I was fourteen. And honestly? I wasn't prepared for all the doors it opened. But, what fourteen year old is? Our own sense of self, our ability to be disciplined and not let the doors of comparison, want and allure open, has not been developed yet

Like anything the world has to offer, Social media can be used for amazing good, but it also comes with a dark side. There are hundreds of problems with social media, but here are just a few.

1. The feeling of inadequacy - In appearance and what we have

This is the one that breaks my heart the most. I truly think we live in a world where the up and coming generation has such a hard battle ahead of them. There is such a struggle in finding our self-worth and so much of it is obtained through a like, a comment or view. How deeply sad is that?

Even knowing the images are manipulated, staged and carefully curated, it is still so easy to get wrapped up in discontent. It is so easy to be left with the doubt of "perhaps if I were prettier, or thinner, or had a nicer home, or better things, I'd be happier".

I have heard so many beautiful people say something like that. They pour over images, and watch a thousand stories of people who appear to "have their life together". Then we are left seeing how our life looks, and we feel such discontent and compare our failures with others success. It is causing people to lose their sense of self wroth. It is burying and destroying passions and enthusiasm. What is being nurtured instead, is a constant need for more, for better and better.

2. Isolation

Studies show that heavy use of social media can lead to the feeling of isolation.

Logging on to Instagram or Facebook first thing in the morning, what do you usually see? People living their best lives, hanging out with friends or family.

This can elicit a feeling of jealousy and being left out, making you pull even further from real life social situations. Viewing others life through a screen can feel incredibly lonely, especially if you deal with anxiety and are shy.

It can make it hard to reach out to friends and family, especially if you feel you are not wanted in that situation. It is a untrue fear of inadequacy that is so real, and deeply painful

3. Depression and Anxiety

Disclaimer: I am not saying Social media is the cause of these problems, but it is certainly an agent.

Social media, or technology in general, is great for finding a place of mindlessness. Scrolling through Instagram, or watching 15 second videos on tick-tock is so much easier than dealing with awkward situations, or heavy thoughts.

It's tempting to just numb all those feelings or pretend to get a notification when things get uncomfortable. Its an easy escape and doesn't teach us how to deal with such situations or emotions. We forget, in this connected world and convenient entertainment, that real life hurts and can be really difficult. But it's that very thing which encourages growth and strength in an individual. If we are constantly shutting those hurts off, ignoring them and letting our life pass by in false comfort, we don't learn to grow from it, but rather we diminish.

Not only that, but think about what are minds were truly created to think and worry about. Our bodies and brains were created to understand survival and community. Think about what a drastic shift to our phycology that does. Our design was focused on a perfect bases of life. Our bodies were built to move, to work with our hands and our minds would follow in harmony. Take that all away, we are left with no arsenal to defend ourselves from this new stress. Left with so much time to think and compare, it is no wonder our minds betray us and become too heavy and chaotic.

4. Our fear of missing out

Gosh have I succumbed to this a million times.

How many time a day do we grab our phone and check our notifications? And out of those time, how many have come up dry? It's an odd disappointment when a little screen can cause such loneliness and fear.

It is a frightening thing to let all that go, to live your life quietly as you are meant to. Maybe use this as a reminder. Don't wait for a notification. Give someone a call and go for a walk or do something creative together. You could very well be the cause of your missing out. So, give that friend or family member a call, go out for some drinks, go for a walk or just chat. Don't let your phone dictate your social life. Start making a change today, maybe you'll inspire and lift those around you to do the same.

5. Bullying

Bullying has always been around. There are a lot of people with deep insecurities and hurting hearts who think taking it out on others will give them validation. We all know they exist, and unfortunately we are going to run into them all our life.

But Social Media has become a place for such poison. It has become so easy to say hideous things to people from the safety of a screen. Where one can really think long and hard on how to hurt others. It is a lot easier than saying those things face to face, where they can sit back and think for hours on the perfect response.

It's easier said then done to just ignore them. There are going to be internet trolls everywhere. They hide behind anonymity where there is no real accountability for their actions.

There are so many young people (And adults) who are not in a good frame of mind to understand that cyberbullying has nothing to do with them. One hurtful comment, as in real life, can completely shatter confidence. By spending so much of our life on social media we leave ourself open to comments and opinions we can't emotionally handle.

Social Media has the opportunity of being an incredible recourse and for many people it is.

I just think it depends on the person and the willpower to not let it control them.

Personally I use it for business, but that does not stop me from falling into any one of these patterns. Everyone is susceptible and it's important to be aware of how it may be effected you and those you love.

I am challenging myself to one full day a week where I do not have my phone and to shutting it all down at 6 pm. Find me on almighty Instagram, here, to hold me accountable. Kindly yell at me if i'm not following through. (Do you get the joke?)

I challenge you to the same. Use the time away from your phone to connect with other people, journal, create or do something you really love.

Social media is an opportunity for incredible success and a creative outlet. Let's just be careful we don't let it consume us.

Reclaim your life, find your smile and joy again and lets reconnect in the old fashioned way.