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First Date Expectations

Should You Go On A Second One?

By Shelley WengerPublished 3 years ago 3 min read
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Photo Courtesy of Canva

Going on a first date can be overwhelming. They are often a bit awkward, with trying to figure out what you should talk about. Minutes can go by, as two strangers attempt to fill the quiet with conversation.

That being said, there are others that go so smoothly that the date doesn't end until the wee hours of the morning. The couple finds out that they have so much in common that they just keep talking.

However, most first dates are somewhere in the middle. If that happens, it can be hard to decide if you want to continue the date another time.

Here are some times when you might want to go on a second date.

You or your date know that you want to go on a second one. There are some dates that are just so easy and fun, there is no questioning whether or not you are going to do it again.

Thinking about a second date brings a smile to your face. There are times when, even thinking about another date, brings a smile to your face. This is a sure sign that you should definitely meet up again.

Your date was attentive to you by asking questions (but didn't let you do all the talking). Good dates are ones where both sides ask questions and feel free to talk about themselves. You may not be interested in someone who did all of the talking or one who wouldn't talk about him or herself the entire time.

He or she was also thoughtful about the date. Dates should be easy, even with busy schedules. If you were able to pick a convenient location and time, that is a sign that dating may go somewhere. If you have to take off work or meet way across town, you may not want to spend the time to do so.

Here are some times when you might not want to go on a second date.

You both want different things. Though many people think that they can change their date’s mind, the truth is that if you want different things, there is no point in continuing. If you want a serious relationship and he or she is not interested, you aren’t going to be able to convince him or her otherwise. If you know you want to get married and have kids (in the future), you shouldn’t start something with someone who has no interest in that.

They can’t stop talking about their ex. Most people try to get over someone by going out with someone else. This is completely normal, so you may hear a few things about their last girlfriend or boyfriend. However, they shouldn’t talk about him or her the entire night (or you might be seriously worried that they aren't over him or her yet).

They are already talking about marriage and a future with you. Though you want to find someone that you can become serious about, the truth is that you don't need to discuss that on a first date. If you find someone who swears that he or she has never felt like this and can’t wait to spend your lives together, you may want to rethink the relationship.

There are times when it can be hard to decide whether or not you should go on a second date. That being said, there are times when there is no doubt. Both of you had such a good time, and thinking about the date brings a smile to your face. However, you should also go on a second date if you are the least bit intrigued. If you found good conversation that was double-sided, it might be worth trying again!

However, if you think that you both want different things, you shouldn’t even think about a second date. This is also true if he or she can’t stop talking about their ex. They may not be ready to date because they haven’t moved on yet!

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About the Creator

Shelley Wenger

Small town country girl in southern Pennsylvania. Raising two boys on a small farm filled with horses, goats, chickens, rabbits, ducks, dogs, and a cat. Certified veterinary technician and writer at Virtually Shelley.

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