Do you dare to love yourself?

As a single young adult, it is a single thought to be circulated amongst you. Being a girl is difficult as it is. Having all these issues with hormones and breakouts, love and hate of makeup, days of feeling extremely bloated and moody. That’s not to say there aren’t any fun perks of being a girl.

Growing up it was a dream majority of young women would align with where we have always dreamed of that one day where our prince charming will finally catch up with us. Where a knight in shining armour dazzles us off our feet and whisks us away to eutopia.

Growing up isn’t easy in this generation. It was quite a roller coaster for me. All these phases we all go throw structure our paths and build the characters we eventually become. If this world has taught me anything it is that there is always something out there making you think you are still behind.

There is always someone out there making you feel as though you have accomplished nothing. Yet it is those thoughts and opinions that we hold close as we get so engrossed in them, we forget there is always another choice to be made. There is always another way. It’s a risk. And love is surely that. A risk.

When you think of love, you see happiness, joy. Now its not all rainbows and sunshine, yet you still crave for that love. I have always craved for that but didn’t know where I craved it from. I have never been a girl waiting for a guy to save me from distress. Now that would be giving too much importance to a man I barely know existed.

Love comes in many shapes and forms. Unconditional love however I have found comes in the form of family. No matter what you do or say to tear them. Family with unwillingly still care for you even when they truly desire not to. I have seen unconditional love on tv screens for many years, I then saw it within my own family, my parents, my siblings, even some of my friends. Now on another post I mentioned my relationships with friends. It hasn’t always been easy, yet in the end I do believe I got through.

In my family, it is culture that when you come of a certain age people start talking about marriage. It is what brings people together and unites families, friends, relations from across different parts. It is seen as a noble and prestigious institute, which it is. Watching two individuals bring people together to share in their bliss is a beautiful concept. And who wouldn’t want to find their ideal, perfect partner. Made only for them.

Still, it isn’t easy finding that special someone if you have yet to find yourself. How do you know what you’re looking for if you’re not quite sure what it is that you want to accomplish yourself? You can easily loose yourself in love but how do you find yourself before love. Everyone likes to think they are independent and confident and can bring about the best in others. Whilst that is all well and true. What about the need to know yourself? Like truly know who you are? Be in love with your character? Do you dare to love yourself before you love another?

Its easy to get lost in the moment where everyone around you is getting married and/or having families of their own. As much as you crave for that next step in your life, are you ready for it? It took me years to come to terms with the idea that I will be fine if it doesn’t happen for me. It wasn’t at all a simple concept to have. But it is what I needed in order to not lose myself in the lives of others that I forget to carve out my own path.

Going on a self-discovery retreat is always best to find the person you wish to be. I found myself as I observed all my friends in their own happily married lives. I found myself when I went on my way to search for a partner. Because I fell in love with who I am and what I intend to be.

I don’t crave for that lovesick, knight in shining armour anymore. I know I can be there for myself and that’s fine. You don’t need someone to save you from the dragon, rescue yourself and fall in love with yourself. Then dare to let someone else fall in love with you. Because that is the best version of yourself that requires nothing from any other individual but their love and respect.

There is no amount of material object in this world that would make me go back to waiting for my prince. He will come when I’m ready. He will come when he’s ready, we all have battles we need to endure on our own sometimes and it is necessary for us to prevail in them. I am not close where I want to be yet. There are so many obstacles still in my path and I intend to go through them. Become the champion of my own battles before I can dare to let myself be loved by another.

So, if you are one of those innocent souls still waiting out there, and I know how hard the wait is believe me. Please do not feel discouraged. It will happen when it will happen.

Whilst you wait though can you honestly say that you have dared to love yourself. Who are you? What do you stand for? I don’t just mean describe yourself. I mean truly think deep about who you are and reflect upon your experiences, everyone’s different. What makes you who you are now than who you were 5 or 10 years ago? Where do you want to be in the next 5 or10 years? It’s worth a thought to those considering their wait for the perfect mach.

I thank you for your support. I always write from my own experience, and views please feel free to leave me a comment and / or a tip to keep the posts alive. I wish to help those in similar points in life to know they are not the only ones going through struggles. There are people out there who care. There are people out there that would give anything to be in your shoes.

Emrae