Distance produces beauty
It is a famous proposition in aesthetics that people must maintain a specific and appropriate distance, such as time distance, space distance and psychological distance, in the aesthetic process of appreciating natural beauty, social beauty and artistic beauty, otherwise it will affect and weaken the aesthetic effect of the aesthetic subject. In fact, in terms of emotions, this one argument also holds true. No matter what kind of feelings, the appropriate distance will produce beauty is right, the so-called distance beauty is hazy beauty.
We say "there is no beauty where you live for a long time", "into the room of the orchid, long and do not smell its fragrance", said that the aesthetic effect is affected by the aesthetic time too long. And Qin bricks and tiles, ancient scenery and old ruins, etc., the longer the time, the more people can give a deep, ancient beauty. These examples are all aesthetic time distance factors at work. When dealing with feelings, it is good to keep a little distance.
From the perspective of human nature, people are always eager to get what they can't get or can't get easily. Human happiness is often based on having what others don't have, and tend to get bored with what they already have. Just like in the movie "Love Calling", the male protagonist Xu Lang can accurately name his wife's series of habitual actions, and it is because of this that he gets aesthetic fatigue and eventually chooses to divorce, while generating deep feelings of regret for every woman he cannot catch up with in the later episodes. This is the so-called distance is too close to it, close to make people feel dull and boring life. Lovers together for a long time sometimes feel that every day together has been accustomed to each other's existence, the two people did not know when the kind of fresh feeling. Instead, they often quarrel and do not accommodate each other like they used to do, and get upset over the smallest things. Sometimes even tired of such a life. Two people's hearts are not firm.
From a rational point of view, people need a little mystery or a little personal space between people, lovers and couples, such as each other even a little personal space, then time will be bored, so then you need to create a distance, because each other after the separation of a desperate desire to reunite the leap, so there is also a "small goodbye is better than a new marriage "a saying. Both for men and women, distance is always necessary, for men, everything he does can be all for love or family, but love is certainly not and should not be his whole, men bear a greater responsibility, can not always look at the family, he has his own career, if a single immersion in the tender, he will become no will, become confused, not only misunderstood themselves more mis The whole family. For women, I prefer women to be financially independent, at least should have their own opinion (never hope she can become a strong woman), can not follow their husbands in everything, otherwise it is easy for men to produce a kind of high above the psychology, which will easily lead to the above results.
Distance often makes people miss the emotions, and there are many famous lines in ancient poetry that illustrate this truth. The two lovebirds are not in the morning and the evening," Qin Guan said. The sentiment of Li Shangyin, "It is difficult to part when we see each other, the east wind has no power to destroy a hundred flowers." These are poems made when you cannot see your lover.
However, there is a saying "distance produces a mistress", indeed, distance in the emotional, distance sometimes does not produce beauty, but away from the beauty. Separate lovers, there is a fixed distance, if coupled with the endless time, a long time and space distance, sometimes may cause each other emotional distance and strangers, or move on. Not living in the same environment, the probability of change is high, because human emotions are fickle, is the need to constantly deepen and constantly replenish through communication. Separated for a long time, whether you can still find a common language, not in the same space, whether your suffering each other to understand, sometimes need a deep look, a warm hug, but it is impossible to always replace with a few words. Gradually the beauty of the distance then becomes the beauty of the memory. And then the memory will slowly fade by time.
I remember watching the battle of marriage when there are such two couples, Guo Yang and Li Mei, Lao Yuan and Yang Dan. Guo Yang and Li Mei is a white-collar couple, right, the plot of the two people quarrel all day long, another quarrel when the lines I remember very well, Li Mei said "you are not so irresponsible before marriage". Guo Yang, however, retorted, "You were not such a bitch before you got married". In my opinion, these two people's life is actually quite happy, but they are always suspicious of each other for the trivial things in life, really the authorities are confused, the observer ah this may be too close to it. Another pair in my opinion is the opposite, two people are business elite level, the company boss, but they are busy with their careers but eventually divorced, the reason is certainly not pay attention to the importance of emotional contact. Distance, too close to life will be too crowded, too far away from the feeling of being in the snowy mountains
According to the aesthetic distance theory of aesthetics, the aesthetic subject to obtain the best aesthetic effect, but also must make the subject and the object to maintain a suitable spatial distance between. The so-called "do not know the true face of Mount Lushan, only the edge of the mountain." That distance is too close, you can not appreciate the overall beauty of things. If the distance is too far, can not see the subtleties of the thing is also difficult to appreciate the beauty of things. Psychological research shows that people are always in a certain spatial distance position relationship, this spatial relationship in a particular environment conveys different psychological feelings, people in friendly when close, in the antagonistic or distant relationship to maintain a certain distance. All these show that: it is necessary to maintain a proper spatial distance in aesthetic activities, and the distance and proximity of space must be combined organically.
There is a story that there were two porcupines with hard and sharp hair. When the weather was particularly cold in winter, the porcupines wanted to lean together to use each other's bodies to keep warm. But when they came close, the tips of their hair stung each other so that they immediately separated, and then had to lean together again because of the cold, and then separated again because of the pain, and so on several times. Finally they found the best distance between each other - in the lightest pain to get the maximum warmth.
In fact, the way to live together as a couple is similar to the porcupine, too close to easily hurt each other, too far away and can not feel each other's care, the best way is not too far not too close a little sticky and not too sticky. And life is to find the right distance.
The so-called distance produces beauty, intimacy should be between. May the world's lovers finally become a family, may the world's couples love each other as before, may the world's family happiness!