Dear TFBS

Dear TFBS

I started to fall in love with you but I’m happy I never said it to you. I started to get comfortable with the fact that you may be here forever but thankfully I never told you. Lastly I stopped looking at other people because I thought you were the one, but thankfully I didn’t tell you that. I loved how much you cared about me just as much as I cared about you. I loved how I was able to talk to you everyday whether I was happy, irritable or sad. I love how you would find a way to cheer me up. I loved how easy it was to talk to you without feeling judged even though you always told me how crazy I was. Deep down I know I am crazy which is why I would let it slide. I loved how honest you were with me, even when I didn’t want to hear it. I loved looking at you even if we weren’t so close to each other while we were together. I loved the way you looked at me everytime we talked. I loved your smile,quirkinesses,laugh and sarcasm. I loved listening to you talk about things you are so passionate about. I loved when you tell me jokes because you are funny. Yes I would get mad when jokes were on me but you always let me know you were kidding even though it did hurt alittle. You gave me time to get over it and even made it up to me. I loved how we had the same goals and ideas about who and what we wanted to be. I loved how happy I was just simply hearing from you. Lastly I miss how we use to talk over the phone even if it was for just 10 or 20 minutes, it would make my whole day better.

I hate you for letting me go without an explanation. I hate you for making me think that we were in this together when in reality your plan was to leave all along. I hate that I got attached to the idea that you would be in my life forever whether if it was as a friend or not. I hate how you couldn’t be upfront with me when it came time to be. I hate how we went from talking everyday to not talking at all. I hate how I can’t forget about you even though I have many people in my life. I hate how when I have good, bad or crazy stories I can’t call you. I hate how much I miss you because you don’t deserve my attention anymore. Lastly I hate how much I want you back in my life but I know you don’t deserve me.

At the end of the day I am doing good. Letting go is hard but I’m trying. I’m going through the motions but I’m getting things done. I fell a few times but I got up. I had some lazy days but I wake up and try to keep myself busy everyday. I will be successful without you by my side even though it would have been nice to have you there. Thank you got your time and patience with me. Thank you for letting go because now I can focus on myself. You are amazing and I will miss you. Letting you go was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done but it needed to be done. Goodbye TFBS I just hope that you miss me alittle when I’m gone.