Cut Fruits and Other Intricate Forms of Love
Love really IS everywhere
Growing up in an Asian household, I could probably count by fingers the number of times my parents explicitly said "I love you" to me and my brother. I don't know what inter-generational thing happened in the past but they made it seem like it is a limited resource that must be saved for special occasion only. And then there were cut fruits. Cut fruits on the dining table after arguments; cut fruits brought to my room when I was doing my homework; cut fruits that I almost never get to eat now that I'm in my mid-twenties living in another city with a full-time job.
If there is one thing I noticed about living away from my parents is that "I love you" is inversely proportional to cut fruits. The less cut fruits I get, the more "I love you" I heard over phone calls with my mum. It is crazy how something like a bowl of cold cut mangoes on a hot day can contain so much depth. Yes I said it, cut fruits have depth, they are more than a form of apology, they are multiple love languages in a bowl.
Then I started thinking about other ways that people have done to show me their love without saying I love you. Simple things like how my dad would hoard loyalty cards from my favourite cafes, all stamped out, with free cup of coffee ready to redeem. Or how my brother and I rarely talks but he always snaps pictures of tote bags and patterned shirts whenever he goes out shopping just in case I'd like to get them. And how my partner would offer to stay on the phone to just listen to me cry because sometimes living alone makes me feel so isolated and just knowing they're there with me through their breathing on the other side of the phone calms me down.
Living in a fast-paced and instant world makes it harder for us to notice the small details. What if we take a moment to stop and talk about love? Not just listen about it through songs, but actually talk about it. The first time I tried to actively think about love and let myself be immersed in my own vulnerability felt like watching a 1-hour YouTube video essay that analysed the most ambiguous movie ending of all time: nothing really makes sense but there is something kinda poetic and beautiful about it. Something that made me realise and think.
I think that humans are build for so much softness and tenderness. We are gifted with the ability to notice intricate things and give them meanings. The beauty of intricate love is that it is personal; it is subtle yet powerful; and it can come from anything and anyone. The world is made for love and we are the vessel for it. What was given to us we transform so beautifully into new gentleness. Love circulates around and follows the conservation of energy, love is what powers us through, love is infinite, love is everywhere.