Cinderella and the Cruise

My mother and I referred to him, my partner Ethan, as "disco Danny" because he always wore the traditional disco clothes and thought he was John Travolta. He was very full of himself, and when we would go out dancing together his favorite thing to do was find a pretty girl in the crowd and then inform me he should be with her. I wasn't allowed to drive, take the bus, work, and when I went to the store I had to give him the receipt and change and it better all be there.

Why I stayed I don't know. I guess I kept thinking he would change, but instead things just got worse. In the midst of all this I won a cruise on Princess Lines leaving from Florida. I was under the impression that maybe he would be better after getting out of San Diego for a while and just relaxing.

The cruise was not what I had imagined. There was one big, shared room where all the women went to fix their hair. There were mirrors and outlets everywhere, and women were still wearing rollers in their hair. One afternoon, I was in there rolling my hair, when an employee of the ship spotted me and proceeded to chase me down the hall trying to make a date in Puerta Rican.

I had no money since I had no job, and Ethan didn't bother to give me any of the $2,000 he brought along to gamble and buy gifts. Those were our only costs except getting into a show in San Juan Puerta Rico. Still, I was enjoying the fabulous meals, the shows after, and being outside in the sunshine for hours. He spent all his time in the casino so we didn't see much of each other, and I was sea sick on top of everything else. One afternoon I heard a free bingo game announced, so I decided to go play. I won $100, but had to split with another lady, but I still had $50 to buy my family at home gifts. I purchased a large, straw purse for my mother, knowing she liked big purses, and I bought my sister a pair of earrings.

When we got home I was in the process of getting my earrings ready to send to my sister when he came into the kitchen and told me he needed my earrings. He had promised the secretary where he worked a gift and forgot to get her one. I felt a big knot in my throat, helping me hold back the angry words that I wanted to throw at him, but part of me knew he was abusive and would hit me if I said what I wanted. I never did give him the earrings, but offered him a pair of mine that I thought would suffice. Still, I shouldn't have had to do that, but I wanted my sister to have those particular earrings.

In the days and weeks that passed, I felt like Cinderella, constantly doing the wash while he sat and watched television, only to jump up and help the woman next door carry her wash downstairs while I carried several loads alone. He had me write a letter he dictated to an old girlfriend that was going to come and visit no less, and when she got there I had to cook for her. While I did all the housework, I held down a full-time job, (Since he couldn't find work, he decided I could go ahead and get a job) and it wasn't until my father fell ill that I realized how trapped I was. I told him I would take the bus home, and while he was in the shower I packed a suitcase and shoved it under the bed. I knew I would lose some things, but I needed to get away from him and this was my best chance. It worked, and I pleaded with him to please not worry about how much luggage I had, I was just upset. I was worried for a few minutes that he wasn't going to let me go, but he finally gave in and let me get on the bus.

My father had passed away by the time I got home, but I never left home again. I had learned my lesson, that a handsome face and the initial attention that I received was not sufficient to make a good relationship, and didn't tell me a thing about the person I was getting involved with. That took time, and I was not about to spend another minute feeling like Cinderella.