Bridging the Distance

There is nothing quite like the heart ache and uncertainty of being separated from the one you love by miles and miles. Being in a long-distance relationship can be one of the most trying obstacles to a relationship. It is a challenge that lots of couples have a have time navigating. The good news is technology has made it easier than it has ever been to send those loving feelings to the object of your adoration. With a little bit of creativity and your love to inspire you, the distance won’t seem as far as you think.

Communication

The most important thing you can do for a long-distance relationship is communicate by whatever means possible. Fortunately, technology has made this part a snap. Texting, messaging, phone calls, and video chatting allows you to stay in almost constant communication. Each have their own perk and can add an element of fun to your communication. Gone is the era of just sending letter and making phone calls (while these are still great and should be part of your communication.)

• Clearly texting your sweetheart several times a day, just to let them know you are thinking of them, is essential.
• Facebook Messenger allows you to forward great posts that you read on Facebook to people you love. It’s a great way to say, “Hey, this was hilarious, and I wanted to share it with you,” or “I thought you would find this interesting.”
• There are several different video chatting options, such as Facebook Messenger, Skype, and Facetime. These are essential because they give you face to face time with your beloved. There is just something about being face to face that helps melt away the miles.

Rituals

When there are miles between you and the object of your affection, it is vital to have rituals that bond you as a couple, rituals being things that you share together that create a unique closeness that you two-alone share. Rituals make it sound complicated but in all reality, it doesn’t have to be complicated. Just the sharing of something special between you that creates a feeling of a connection.

• Sharing songs or music through a text or creating a special playlist on platforms like YouTube or Google Play. (Remember the days of giving your love mixed tapes of songs that just made you think of them?)
• Watching a weekly TV show or sport team’s game while on the phone together and talk about afterwards.
• Playing games on multi-player games on your cell phone or computer. Games such as Words with Friends, Draw Something, Trivia Crack, or Chess can create a healthy competition and keep things fresh.
• Good old fashioned letter writing. Sometimes the most intimate ways to share your feelings is through the written word. There is a reason that love letters are considered romantic.

Gifts

Show your love that even though they are out of sight, they are not out of mind. This is an opportunity to let your creativity shine. Giving your special someone a gift doesn’t have to be about the amount of money you spent. It’s more about showing them that they are cherished, special, and tell them that you are thinking of them. It’s true what they say: it really is the thought that counts.

• A care package with their favorite treats (candy, homemade cookies, etc.)
• Matching couple gifts such as coffee cups, special ornaments, keyrings, blankets—the options are endless and there are a number of websites that carry these types of gifts (Giftforyounow.com, Boldloft.com, potterybarn.com, personalizationmall.com)
• Photo books that contain special pictures of memories that you have shared. (Walmart.com, Shutterfly.com, snapfish.com)
• Create your own love story. This can be a simple as typing it up on your computer, buying little gift books that you fill in the answers to prompted questions (Barnes and Noble, Amazon.com) or use professional services such as lovebooksonline.com or heartfeltbooks.com.

Optimism and Honesty

Your relationship cannot hope to flourish if either of these elements are missing, especially if you are throwing in the added difficulty of being some distance away from one another. One of the most important things you can do is be optimistic and upbeat, even if you don’t feel it. The time you limited time you spend with your significant other needs to be positive. You want to make sure that your encounters are good ones that encourages them as well as entices them to look forward to your interactions. It is easy for people to let the drain of the miles weigh them down but don’t want that stress cause friction in your relationship.

Honesty is always important, but trust is very much hanging in the balance. Your love needs to know that they will be able to trust you and that you will be upfront and honest with them and vice versa. Conversely, you need to create an environment that supports the honesty you want to receive. You partner needs to feel like they are safe to be vulnerable with you. You both need to agree what is acceptable in your relationship and be willing to live up to those expectations.

Make Future Plans

Knowing that your current situation is temporary and you will be able to be together some day helps carry you over the rough spots. Nothing is harder than missing someone and feeling like the exile you are living in will never come to an end. It is vital that you try to keep planning for the future you want together. Make plans not just for when you will finally be together, never to be separated again but in the interim. Make plans to meet for things that excite you and make being together fun.

• Buy tickets to a concert or a movie that you both want to see.
• Plan a vacation or long weekend away together.
• Window shop for things that you will want to purchase for your joint apartment or home.
• Talk about your life together in the future. Plan your life together. Sometimes it’s just fun to imagine and dream.

In the end, keeping your relationship going over a long distance is one of the most difficult challenges a relationship can face. It's not an impossible however and in the end, it can be something that reinforces your relationship rather than detract from it. The most important part is to just hang in there, have faith, and know that if you are meant to be it will work out in the end.