BOB

She never complained. If she had a ferocious headache, she’d sit quietly and have a cup of tea. If she had aches and pains with arthritis, you’d never know it. She did her best to remain active. That’s why when she said to her husband, “I think I need to go to the hospital”, he didn’t hesitate.

Her diagnosis was advanced stomach cancer. There was no hope, and her time even with treatment, limited. Losing Ronnie was difficult, so we all decided to rally around Harry and try to make his adjustment to a single life a little bit more manageable.

Harry continued to be an important part of our group of friends and never once missed a party or gathering. He needed his friends as much as we need to be sure he’d be ok getting back into the life of a single man.

To ease some of his loneliness, he arranged to adopt a rescue puppy. Sadie was the most adorable mutt I ever saw. Yes, she’s a mutt, a Heinz-57 variety with no special breed being dominant. She’s gentle, sheds very little, rarely barks and loves company.

Even with Harry’s friends stopping by to say hello, he found himself still lonely. I guess that’s why he’d bring Sadie out to the garage and tie her leash to a long rope, toss her blanket on the ground, and sit with her. He bought a laptop and would sit for hours watching TV shows, news, and reading the newspaper while Sadie chewed her bone or watched the people walk by.

Our neighborhood has many people who own dogs and walk them regularly. Many would stop and give Sadie the attention her wagging tail needed. As they petted Sadie, a conversation between them and Harry would always begin. While he never invited anyone into his house, he was often invited to join others for coffee, sometimes in their homes but more often, at the park where the “doggie section” was located.

As time went on, Harry began to enjoy life. He was no longer lonely. The men that stopped would talk about their hobbies: sailing, carpentry, making and flying model planes, etc. The women would offer suggestions on recipes, clubs geared to senior singles, card games, and other social clubs.

Very often, Harry would be invited to join one of the men to a men’s only luncheon; Harry went frequently and thoroughly enjoyed himself.

Some of the women had gotten in the habit of bringing meals – however, they were all too often meals-for-one indicating none were interested in starting a relationship. That was fine with Harry. He wasn’t interested either.

While the men spoke of impersonal subjects, the women, as they got to know Harry, began more personal conversations, which included topics of their late husbands, their children, vacations they’d taken before and after they lost their spouses, and their would-be bucket lists. Don’t we all have our bucket lists?

A few women would tell Harry about the single cruises offered by cruise lines saying they’d already been on a few and had more fun than they imagined, and how he should seriously consider going on one. Harry always said he’d think about it, but knowing Harry, I doubt he thought too hard or too long. Vacationing alone just wasn’t something he’d want to do. In addition, he would not want to board Sadie.

Then, one day, I heard a knock on my door. (Why he didn’t ring the bell is beyond me, but Harry always knocked.)

“Hey, Sweetie, what’s up?” I always called him Sweetie because, well, he’s a very sweet guy. I asked if he’d like coffee, tea, a soft drink, or anything a bit harder. He opted for the flavored coffee that was his all-time favorite. I was glad I’d gotten to the store the day before since that day I had realized I was completely out of that flavor.

As we sat drinking coffee, I noticed he was a little antsy as if he wanted to tell me something but wasn’t sure how to being the conversation. I decided to help.

“So, how’s your love life going? I haven’t seen you or Sadie in the garage in a few weeks. I told my husband that if I hadn’t seen or heard from you by tomorrow, one of us would be ringing your doorbell but then, I saw Marty’s car in your driveway, so I knew you were ok but are you really? Are the women still beating down your front door?”

He laughed and said, “Funny you should talk about a love life!” Then he hesitated.

“Come on, Harry, you can’t say that and stop talking. Let’s hear the rest.”

“Ok here goes! Do you remember I mentioned Valerie?”

I stopped to think. Valerie! Valerie!

“Oh, wait. Isn’t she the one with the Pomeranian?”

“Yep, that’s her.” Then he began what put that weird, humorous twinkle in his eye.

“About two weeks ago, I was sitting in the garage with Sadie. She was on her blanket, enjoying a chew stick I’d gotten her, and I was having a glass of sweet tea and the lunch I’d just made. Valerie was walking Muffin. I still can’t believe she’d call the dog Muffin but anyway … she stopped by the garage and started the usual conversation. ‘So, how’re things going?’ ‘My daughter called the other night.’ ‘My son’s girlfriend, whom I hope will soon be his ex-girlfriend started trouble again’ … and on and on she went.”

He stopped for a few seconds and took another gulp of his coffee. “Mmm, this is really good, but getting back to Valerie … I was trying to figure out how to shut her up, so I finally got a word in and asked, ‘but how are YOU doing’?

‘Oh me?’ she replied. ‘Well, if it weren’t for Bob, I’d be losing my mind.’

Bob? She’s already gotten a boyfriend? She lost her husband about four months after I lost Ronnie. I had to ask.

‘Bob? I don’t think I know him. Who’s Bob?’

‘Oh, come on, Harry! Everyone knows Bob!’

I sure as heck didn’t, so I answered, ‘I’m not sure I do.’

She smiled and replied, ‘Harry, B-O-B!'

‘Valerie, I know how to spell Bob, but I don’t know anyone by that name.’

She started to laugh. ‘Harry, it’s B-O-B! It means BATTERY OPERATED BOYFRIEND!’

I didn’t know what to say. I was stunned beyond words. Finally getting my wits, I said, ‘OMG, my phone’s ringing. I’d better to get that. My daughter is supposed to call.’ I immediately stood and as fast as I could grabbed Sadie’s collar and ran in the house. I shut the door and haven’t sat in the garage since.’”

Harry’s face was the color of a ripe beet by the time he was finished with his story, and I sat there and laughed until tears came down my face.

Even now, after seven years, occasionally I’ll ask Harry if he ever bought stock in Eveready batteries.