Awkward First Date: What Can You Do To Save Face?

Some people come off creepy when they are nervous. They stare at you in silence, not knowing what to say. You fidget, get anxious that maybe they just don’t like you.

At that moment, you want to end the date and quickly leave before losing your cool. Instead of leaving, you can actually do something to create a more friendly atmosphere.

But what if the situation was more of a domineering one?

I was unfortunate to witness an awkward date that left me clinging to my fist.

I was having dinner with an acquaintance, and everything was going smoothly with us, but the couple sitting behind my date had this toxic energy oozing from their table.

The lady was quite composed and calm that you would hardly notice her discomfort. The guy kept ordering on her behalf, and she would correct him politely, trying to get along with his bad manners.

He ordered her drink which had alcohol in it, and she rejected it and requested a glass of wine instead. Then he ordered her a soup, which she stated she didn’t want. Then he ordered her meal, a plate of cauliflower grits with shrimp. She said she was allergic to shellfish and requested chicken marsala.

She was very sweet until something happened. I didn’t catch it, but then I saw her pour her drink over the guy’s face and walked out of the room.

I assumed she reached breaking point and could not hold her disgust any further.

No doubt, first dates have the potential to be awkward. For some, the fear of an awkward first date is so powerful that it keeps them from dating at all.

But if you refuse to be scared of the unknown, then you’ll be the better for it. Here are five common awkward date scenarios to look out for.

He tried to kiss you at the end of the date

I don’t know why guys think it’s a ritual to kiss a woman at the end of the date. It looks cute and romantic to get kissed after a lovely evening. But if you have to look at the woman’s body language before proceeding with such a ritual.

Not all women like getting kissed by strangers. I’ve brushed my face off when guys want to kiss me after they dropped me off. So far, it has worked to make the situation less awkward. Or you can gently press his torso back to prevent his face from getting any closer and let him know it’s too soon for you.

He cooks a meal you are allergic to after a romantic night

You can’t expect your date to know everything about you in one night. He’s bound to flip and do something outside your comfort zone.

I find it romantic when a guy I recently met offers me a home-cooked breakfast the morning after a night of passion. But if it’s a food I’m allergic to, I would thank him for his sweetness and offer to prepare myself something else.

Most times, I’d request a toast with tea, so he doesn’t feel embarrassed for getting turned down.

She thinks she made a mistake going out with you

You took her to a movie, cuddled a bit. At the end of the date, you get a kiss on the chin. You feel endorphins rush through your veins, sending a chill all over your body.

While the two of you are embraced in a gaze, unable to pull away from each other, her husband walks in on you two, and she quickly pulls her hand. It turns out she was using you to get back to her soon-to-be jealous ex.

Her reaction could be seen as a red flag for most guys. Because if she feels uncomfortable being around you, she might still have some romantic attraction for her husband even though they are a legally separated couple living together.

In that moment of awareness, it will be best to respect her space and go home. You can discuss where you two stand later when she’s relaxed.

He tries to use his kids to get something from you

As someone who likes dating family men more often, there’s something that pisses me off in single dads, and that is trying to con me with the help of your kids.

I know some men think it’s romantic when their kids make innocent requests to their girlfriends. However, some women feel awkward about it, especially if the child sees hers as a mummy figure when she barely knows her dad.

For the sake of the child, you may agree to do something you wouldn’t normally do. But you can also turn down the child politely and have him/her know such behavior is manipulative and unacceptable.

If the guy is the controlling type, he will learn how to treat you respectfully for standing your ground because he sees you aren’t going to be easy to walk over.

What to do when your date becomes awkward

If your date feels uncomfortable because the conversation is weird, stay calm.

You don’t need to take responsibility for the awkwardness. The date isn’t awkward because of everything you are doing. You are not talking too much; you’re not acting weird. You are just being yourself.

Being confident that you are doing enough is shown in your posture and how you speak.

If you are bored, nervous, or uncomfortable, your body language probably shows it. Keep your shoulders back, your chin up, and make eye contact with your date.

Psychologically, sitting straight can instill more confidence and help shake off that negative energy.

Focus on making a connection if you like the person and try not to let the discomfort you feel distract you. Some people get nervous when they don’t really know you. As they see you more frequently, you will notice they are fun to be around.

Even if you never want to see the person again, you will want to protect your integrity, and by focusing on building a bond, you will avoid sounding arrogant and will effectively engage your date in conversation until the date ends.

Your date should also participate; if they don’t ask you questions or contribute to the conversation in a meaningful way, then this person may not be what you are looking for.

It’s not up to you to put the experience together from start to finish. A date involves two people, not just you.

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About author

Jessey Anthony is a motivational speaker, fitness coach and relationship expert who helps people become confident in themselves in any challenges they face in life. Sign up to my newsletter & more cool stuff.

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