Are You My Forever?

by Maya Bronaugh 2 years ago in love

I turned out liking you more than I planned.

Are You My Forever?

Casual. That's what we agreed on. That's what we agreed was best since I wasn't sure about what it was that I want and you planned on leaving in the fall, but things changed. I turned out liking you more than I originally planned.

It wasn't love at first sight. When we met I was skeptical about ever seeing you again, but I liked how persistent you were (are). You knew instantly that you wanted to see me again while I wasn't sure, but I wanted to do things differently than before in my past dating life, so I agreed and I'm very happy I did.

You took me to your favorite restaurant and we shared two delicious entrees (I should have said sorry in advance, because it's my favorite thing to do) and after you ordered one of my favorite desserts. The night was filled with laughter and what made it even better was that the restaurant was empty, so we were as loud and silly as we wanted to be. After dinner you walked me to my car. I don't think either of us wanted the night to end so we stood in the parking lot talking. You proceeded to ask me on a third date. Of course I said yes, and afterwards you said, "I'm going to kiss you now," and you did. 6'5", you bent down and kiss 5'1" me. Never have I ever been so excited to kiss someone and feel butterflies.

Numerous dates passed and I met your mother, sister, brother-in-law, and best friends from first grade. I accidentally overheard a conversation with your dad, so I know you talk to him about me. You told me about your love for Nintendo. You reintroduced me to wrestling, sharing with me how you and your grandfather watched this before has passed away. Now here I am, loving wrestling just as much as you. #GETTHEHANDS. I just love talking to you. I love finding things to make you laugh. I love laughing with you; it's the best feeling.

Casual.

That's what we agreed on, yet it wasn't feeling that way. I swore I wasn't going to catch feelings for you because you were leaving in the fall, yet here I am, falling for you. The second you made me laugh, the day you opened up to me about your situation, I couldn't help but like you a little more than I planned. It became something I couldn't control

I'm scared. I'm so scared that what I'm feeling is wrong and you're not my forever. But are you? Are you my forever? Did God answer my prayers and send you to me or are you another lesson? Are you willing to give us a real chance? Are you willing to stay and not run from what you're scared of, but face them with me, together? Because what I feel for you is nothing I have ever felt before in my life and I've been in love before. How can something that scares me make me happy all in one? Something I had given up on came into my life so unexpectedly and I don't know what to do because losing you is not something I want to happen. So stay... and be my forever.

love
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'