A job I have given to my-self

Before we embark upon this little story of what on Earth even is a job? I am calling out the writing in this prompt on Vocal. Not a personal thing, cause no-thing can possibly be a personal attack.

"While not everyone has the job of their dreams, there are almost always reasons why you love your job—at least some aspects of it."

I mean a job = work. The polar is play. Play is stress-free, fully immersed in the Now, laughter, silliness, joy, dance. Work = stressful, strenuous, trying to achieve something in the make-believe future, seriousness, stuck at a desk, NOT dancing.

"There are almost always reasons why you love your job—at least some aspects of it."

If Love is completeness and wholeness, then how can you feel complete and whole in just one or two segments of the full sphere of your job?

I think we can agree that this sentence can be realistically translated into the clearer language of: Look, the vast majority of us hate our job, I'm projecting an insecure lie out here, of there always being 'at least some aspect' to Love about our jobs, because we don't want to admit that this is nonsense and we want to keep pretending we are ok, to cover up the truth that we feel like slaves in the system of underground puppet masters.

Anyway, let's dive into this. Keep your ears wide open and the awareness attentive and still.

I Love my job, because if I didn't, then I would still be experiencing insanity.

Let's get this straight. I have a job. You know, that conceptual societal role where I give a service to another, in exchange for some conceptual monetary credit. I film and edit videos and take and edit photos for musicians, businesses, actors, whatever, I don't really care. It pays the bills and gives me some financial freedom.

But within this job, lies a much deeper job and purpose. A job of planting seeds of Truth and Love, which are inseparable. You see, my 'clients' are all paying a ton of money to look good on camera, so that they can become a 'somebody'. Why do they want to become a somebody? Well, who hasn't? Whether it's as extreme as the President of the United States, the top athlete in the world, or the kid that likes to be known for listening to Lil' Peep and taking benzos. It's all a bullshit identity of individuality to cling on to, as it's all we think we have got to deserve our breath.

We all often feel or have felt unworthy about who we think we are. You know, the trauma from the past; the way we were lied to, manipulated, abused, controlled and the way we lied to, manipulated, abused and controlled others, too. It sticks with us deep in our sub-conscious and manifests as emotional, spiritual and physical dis-ease.

'Becoming a somebody' means that in this moment right now, 'I am not enough'. I must become. I must become rich, famous, successful, popular, funny et cetera. Ultimately, I am fighting for my right to exist.

Let me ask you this:

If we are always becoming, then we are never Being. And if we are never Being, then are we technically not living? If life is consciousness/awareness and the awareness is in the conceptual future, because of the conceptual past, then we may as well be dead, no?

So with my surface level filming job, it's simultaneously pain-full and beauty-full. The pain happens when I'm conflicted in my own morality when asked by the artist to 'go for another take, because my hair moved in that shot'. This is what goes through my head: I'm being paid to deliver this desire, so I can afford to put bread on my plate, but I am also aware that they are in pain constantly trying to prove their worthiness to the world, because they feel so unworthy internally. Do I ignore their request and ask them Who They Really Are, underneath the attachment to their Hi(S)tory of collective conceptual memories about who they think they are and have to be for everyone else but their own Being? Do I help them toward realising enlightenment, so that they can live in-Love, Presence and Play in each and every moment that they re-member to? Or do I grant them their free will of the Earth-time fleeting addiction to the sleep-state of worthlessness and madness? Bread on my plate for their free will? Hungry me for calling out their bullshit? Ahhhhh someone save me from myself. Hmmm..

On the contrary, when I don't experience my own attachment and neurosis in these funny situations (yes, my perception changes frequently in this spiritual awakening journey of self-awareness and realisation of the Truth), I feel so blessed, worthwhile, present and in-Love, when I don't mind what they decide to do and I decide instead, to just plant a little seed here and there, which I know could someday well and truly grow into a mighty oak tree, learning and evolving, nourishing itself and others with pure oxygen, with no ulterior motive and ascending into more and more light after each cycle. Now that's fun, because I know I did something good, without expectation or attachment to potential outcome. Funnily enough, with each endeavour that I hold no attachment, something seems to work out 10 times better as a by-product anyway.

Ultimately, I don't give a shit about the work that I do at the moment which makes me money. I still do a cracking job, because that's the agreement we have between us, but it just doesn't phase me. I deliver the job, get paid and move on. But what I do give a shit about, is how I can say something in any appropriate moment, or more importantly, Be something whilst I do something in that moment; maybe it's non-reactive, relaxed and trusting under conceptual pressure or just fully accepting and Loving each occurrence as it comes in each moment. What I keep re-minding my-self on my simultaneous journey of self and no-self is that life is not so much about what I do, but how I am Being whilst doing it.

So yes, I love my job, my real job of serving humanity and Mother Earth, because If I didn't Love it, then I wouldn't know Love and I would still be insane.

Agapē️ Nowhere