7 Traits of a Cheater

How do you put a face to infidelity? The answer is, you can’t. Just as you were taught not to judge a book by its cover, it’s near impossible to look someone in the eye and, in just one glance, know they’re a cheater. However, if any of the following red flags are waving right in front of you, it could be a sign that your partner’s up to something.

Cheaters like to keep their personal lives private

It is a truth universally acknowledged that secrets are no fun unless you share with everyone. But not only are a cheater’s secrets not fun, they’re rarely shared with anyone.

A cheater’s secrets can often be revealed through their recent calls list, in text messages on their phone, or a private folder in their email. But a constantly locked and guarded phone especially is a dead giveaway.

Cheaters tend to put some pretty intense privacy setting on their personal lives too, so it’s not just their romantic happenings they’ll keep to themselves. They prefer to keep all personal details such as things about their family, who their friends are, and where they work.

Cheaters will rarely, if ever, call you by name

This trick of the trade strategy of calling girlfriends “baby” and “sweetheart” is a legitimate tactic cheaters use to make sure they aren’t mixing up your name with their other partner’s name. Cheaters will latch onto cutesy nicknames like “baby” and “sweetheart” so that the odds of a slip up are in their favor.

Cheaters know how to lie, and know how to lie well

Don’t feel bad if you’ve ever fallen for a cheater’s false promises and lame excuses for canceling plans in the past. It’s easy to do because they’re eerily good at it.

Cheaters will sometimes lay the groundwork for future lies ahead of time in order to cover their tracks later on in the relationship. What’s even more disturbing about cheaters is that not only do they know what to say, they know how to say it, and how to carry themselves so that their body language doesn’t give away a lie.

They aren’t necessarily unavailable, but they aren’t exactly available, either

In the beginning of every relationship, there’s a honeymoon phase when everything’s coming up roses, and you can’t keep your hands off each other. Eventually that all dies down, but even though you might not be showering one another with the same attention or affection that you were at the start of it all, typically some kind of spark is still burning. However, if they embark on seeing people behind your back then the first sign of this infidelity is persistent distance.

They tend to rationalize their behavior

You’ve heard the phrase “it’s not you, it’s me?” Cheaters tend to take stock in the reverse. Nothing a cheater does is your fault, but the second they start rationalizing their affair aloud to you, it can be easy to forget they acted on their own accord. Once they start making you doubt yourself, it could be a sign your partner is trying to get inside your head and make it so that you blame yourself for their “needing” to cheat.

A cheater’s instinct is to beat around the bush

Let’s say you ask your significant other about a single friend or co-worker they’ve been cozying up to or talking a lot with recently. Are they quick to change the subject? If so, that’s a blatant red flag your partner might be doing something suspicious. Cheaters deflect pointed conversations by changing the true subject and always minimizing their actions.

Cheaters are impulsive, and can’t resist taking that risk

Cheaters, like bullies, are fueled by power, and drawn to risk. This kind of behavior, however, is a reflection of something deeply rooted inside of them. They will always try and take on that other conquest and play that game at-least one more time.