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5 Mindset to Have a Great Date

#1 Be one

By Rashmi GPublished 2 years ago 4 min read
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5 Mindset to Have a Great Date
Photo by Andy Li on Unsplash

Blame it on my Type A personality.

I research my date before I meet them. I would read up dating secrets, tips & tricks, zodiac sign compatibility. The more I know about the theory of dating the better. But after two years of being in the online dating pool here’s the lesson - not everything works and let it go.

I learnt that enjoying your date depends on how invested you are in. Yes, there are other factors - your date being a comfortable person, a safe environment, no obvious red flags,no alarm bells courtesy - your intuition. But can having a pre - date ritual or a certain mindset help?

Turns out it could.

These tips are not sure shot ways for finding “the one”.

I have just listed down points from my life, from what I have heard from talking to other single or partnered friends. Hope they help you have a date worth telling your grandchildren:

#1 Be The Date You Wish To Meet

Enthusiasm makes all the difference in the world.

And that comes from agreeing to meet someone you are excited about. Someone who makes you say a”big yes!”.

You know something clicks. Call it intuition based but excitement translates into efforts. And people are no fools. They can sense your energy if you are truly interested in meeting them.

So, be selective and agree to only those you feel the spark. It might not be your “one” but you are assured of a good time.

#2 Lower Your Expectations

Don’t expect the date to turn or show signs of “the someone” you have in head. It becomes dating two people then.

You are meeting a person who has lived a lifetime like you. There is going to be a lot of stories to share. Listen to them without judgements. Share yours.

They can turn out to be a friend, an inspiration to live your life better or a nobody.

Go with an open mind.

#3 Practice A Pre Date Ritual

I try to schedule my self care session the day I am going to meet someone.

I have my customised DIY face and hair pack routine .

The post self-care glow itself assures me of a decent rest of the day. A friend of mine has a playlist she listens to. Another has a specific perfume for his first date. Doing anything that makes you happy and puts you in a better state of mind.

Even if the date ended up a “meh”, you were a ray of sunshine and can let it go.

#4 Be Ready to Laugh It Off

Let go of the urge to have a date like a clockwork.

Be flexible with the timing too. Allow yourself or your date to be late. It’s a normal world buddy, there is traffic.

The cafe you planned might be house-full. Rain might play spoilsport for your walk in the park date. You might fall face down when you are trying to get down from a hammock (happened to me). The pub might have just served the worst blueberry cheesecake of your life.

Just have a laugh and may the power of spontaneity be with you. Take a walk, re schedule the cafe date into exploring an art museum date.

As for the pub, if you are like me - go ahead and make a fool of yourself on the dance floor.

Just be you.

#Be Open With Your Values

Not everything can be laughed off.

Stand by your values and comfort level. No alcohol that day? Tell them before.

This includes conveying your comfort with the first date kiss and sex too.

Even if your date feels like the last best person on earth, hear me out - No one is worth lowering your boundaries for.

Trust your instincts and have a no compromise policy on your safety and rules. A good person worth your time would understand.

A great date is all about being yourself and being true to yourself first.

Final Thoughts

So here you have it - Than reading up generic dating advice, let your instinct guide you. Trust it, let go of expectations and have a great time while staying by your values.

Thank you for reading!

dating
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About the Creator

Rashmi G

Fascinated by topics on mind, astronomy and self-growth

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