14 Incredibly Powerful But Simple Life Lessons

It was wicked cold and frigid, and the wind made it worse as I sat on the beach, looking out into the expansive, never-ending ocean far up in the Arctic Circle.

The vastness, coupled with the wind that seemed to emerge from nowhere, reminds me how small we are in the scheme of things. The place was Norway, but to tell you the truth, it could have been any remote, desolate piece of earth. And that cold I mentioned? Yeah, it was bone-piercing.

The thing is, when I think back to that time in my life, I feel enveloped in a warm sensation that keeps me grounded and peaceful, even on colder days.

Weird? I mean, weird that I feel warm talking about a frigid day outside? Perhaps.

That was my spot for thinking and reflection. In the cold. By the Barents Sea.

Now here I am, on my 56th trip around the sun. And today, as I sit here in scorching hot Texas summer heat, board shorts, no shirt, and barefoot, I was reflecting on my life—

The highs, the lows...

The peaks, the troughs...

The blessings, the lessons...

The times I was brave and the moments I failed to be.

It got me thinking, one of the biggest lessons being that life is unpredictable. No matter how much you plan or try to control it, life has a way of unfolding in its own time and on its own terms. Sometimes the unfold is glorious, and other times the unfold just fucks you up all kinda ways.

As I swagger into my 56th year, I have amassed a treasure trove of lessons and wisdom, and today, all I wanna do is share some of them in hopes that maybe we connect deeper, or we learn, or you just have a good time picking up what I'm putting down.

Here’s my little box of big wisdom.

1. Nothing is forever.

Change is a given.

Habitual patterns make us cling to the illusion of permanence. If we do it today, then tomorrow, then next week, we feel a sense of forever-ness, and gives us something to latch onto and hope for. But the truth is everything is temporary.

Embrace the brevity of life by chasing what stirs your soul and living in the present.

2. How you treat yourself shows.

Or put another way, the respect (or lack of it) you command from others is a mirror image of your self-esteem.

How you allow people to treat you is how you feel about yourself. A lack of boundaries and an overriding fear of confrontation could invite ill-treatment. It starts and ends with you.

3. Happiness comes from within.

Nobody is responsible for your happiness except you.

But it also comes and goes. Seize it when it comes and seek it within rather than depending on external sources. Don't wait for someone to bring it to you, instead, go inside and listen to what moves you, stirs you, and, yeah, makes you smile. Then do more of that.

4. Don’t play it too safe.

Comfort zones may feel sheltered, but true growth often lies beyond them.

You've heard this a thousand times, and yet we still love our comfort zones even though most of us know that very little actually flourishes there. What if you stopped playing it so damn safe? What if you took just one step, and there was a whole new world waiting?

Imagine the possibilities that await beyond the borders of convenience.

5. Hearts are diverse.

We all have different hearts, different values.

Sometimes we think, and on some levels want to believe, that everyone has the same heart as us, but they don’t. And no, it's neither good nor bad, it just is.

Don't project your values onto others. This will only lead to disappointments.

6. Everybody lies.

Some are little white ones, and some might shatter a world if found out.

But the worst, the biggest, are the ones we tell ourselves. Often, we convince ourselves that we're living the life we want when in fact, we may be living someone else's dream. We stay put when we know we should leave. We allow ourselves to be treated in ways that are far from what we deserve.

7. Listening is a lost art.

Too often, we "hear" only to form a response.

Real listening means hearing another person without immediate judgment or the rush to respond. It's a skill that fosters deeper understanding. It's something we must all practice and develop if we want to connect with others.

8. Ego is a mask.

Ego often serves as a shield for our insecurities, much like a mask hides who we are.

When we let our egos drive our actions, we risk damaging our relationships and displaying our worst selves. A little ego has a place here and there, but if it gets out of hand, it’s toxic.

9. Gratitude can transform you.

Embracing gratitude can radically shift your mindset. Celebrate the smallest blessings, but avoid toxic positivity.

10. Closure is always your choice.

Not all situations offer closure.

At times, you need to grant it to yourself to move forward. Accept that closure won’t be on your timeline, on your terms, and move forward regardless. Every one of us wants some form of closure because it puts a period on that part of life.

Sometimes though, you will not receive it in the way you envisioned, so give it to yourself.

11. Letting go can really suck.

When one door closes, another opens.

And yes, it's gut-wrenching, it's sad, it's heartbreaking, and often it hurts. But holding something that isn't yours is worse. It can be difficult, but accepting the pain and letting go is often the most courageous decision you'll make in life.

So yeah, letting go can really suck, but damn, will it ever set you free.

12. Your energy is influence.

Your energy makes an impression before you do.

Strive to raise your energy by doing good, practicing mindfulness, and working towards self-improvement. Or, put another simpler way, don't be an ass. The reason you are where you are today can be directly tied to your energy and what or who it attracts.

We are attracted to and drawn to certain people because of the energy they emit.

13. Loving yourself.

Self-love is your greatest offering to the world.

Learn to prioritize yourself by setting boundaries, taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional health, and seeking help when needed. Learn to be content and happy on your own, and show others how to love you by loving yourself enough.

14. You're gonna die.

It's not morbid, and it's true.

My days are numbered, and so are yours. Everything you just read here can be awesome and then tossed aside. Or everything you just read here can sink in, and maybe you decide to enact some of these things I've shared.

But make no mistake, we all die. All that is left is one question that only you can answer.

"Did I matter, and did I make a difference?"

The final word

Lessons are sprinkled throughout our lives.

It is crucial to accept these lessons and utilize them as a catalyst for growth and transformation. Some lessons are undeniably ruthless, tearing apart your very being and trampling on your soul. You may feel utterly defeated, breathless, and overwhelmed with terrifying thoughts that question your identity, your actions, and your will to carry on. But you must rise above and push through, for the sake of your own resilience and progress.

As we gain knowledge from our experiences, we attain a level of wisdom that allows us to let go of any negative emotions and embrace personal growth and new possibilities with enthusiasm.

On those arctic days, with the wind howling and snow often falling, I'd find myself staring up into the sky, thanking God for this imperfect but beautiful life and the wisdom to learn from it all.

Happy 56th birthday to me.