Nightmare Journal: Knife Intruder

*Ding Clang Ding*

*Ding Clang Ding*

I let out a hoarse groan as I reach over to get my phone off the charger. Its dusk, no sound needs to be that loud right now, especially on one hour of sleep. I stupidly worked out later than I should have last night and my pre-workout surged through my body, keeping me up until 4 AM. My alarm was set for 5, and then 5:05, 5:10, 5:15, etc.; I had to be at Mary’s at 6:45, and I had already slept in late on her once so I couldn’t let it happen again. I punish myself by getting up at one of the earlier dings, for it’s my fault I kept the energy going anyways. My workout wasn’t as strenuous as it usually is because my new smoking habit made my lungs collapse easier on my run, therefore I settled for walking, which took little to no energy from my cracked out veins.

I roll off of the couch and immediately get my coffee, and then slowly, very slowly, gather my lunch and other items for the day. I leave early, mostly so I can smoke more cigarettes in my car, and also so I wouldn’t sit back down and fall asleep. I get there in a nicotine and heightened heart rate daze, still extremely exhausted even with the coffee. I let myself in to her place, make myself comfy on her couch, and try to figure out how I’m going to deal with a toddler all day. While she gets ready for work, I tell Mary my current situation and she offers that I nap while Maya naps today. I started counting down the minutes immediately.

Maya begins to get overly ornery around 12 PM, and I know it’s finally my time to shine. I put her in her crib and happily prance back downstairs to the couch. My eyes are already heavy and ready to go. I lay down, and just like that I drift to the land of dreams, where I stay until I hear Maya crying. Only thing is, my eyes won’t open. I sway in between sleep and reality and I convince myself her crying is in my dream. She’s almost wailing at this point, and she never does anything but a light yell so I figure it must be my anxiety of her waking up flowing in to my dream. The crying gets louder and louder, and I call out her name, not sure if I do in real life as well because I’m still in a weird limbo.

The crying stops, and I figure I was right, no need to force myself to get up just yet. Then, I hear rumbling, like someone walking around upstairs, or maybe outside. This building has thin walls so I don’t think anything of it. Still, I try to open my eyes again and they won’t. I float in and out of consciousness and can’t decipher what sounds belongs where. I lay there in the abyss and start to feel uneasy. Why can’t I get up? Is Maya okay? Am I still dreaming? What if those footsteps were…and then, I remember the door has been unlocked this whole time.

That’s when I feel a presence in the room. I beg my eyes to open but it’s as if they’re sealed shut. If there is an intruder I need to take note of what they look like in case I need to call the police. I need to open my eyes. Oh god, I hope they didn’t hurt Maya. I’m praying it’s just a robbery, where at least we stay safe, but before I can finish that prayer, I feel him behind me. I don’t know how I knew he was male, I could just sense the masculinity I guess. Maybe it was in the way he held the knife's point to my neck, with such aggression, and no remorse.

My eyes fluttered open for maybe a moment but all I could make out as a black hooded blur. He mumbled something I couldn’t understand, and I’m not even sure if I let out a scream or not, I was so focused on the knife and its progressing pressure, and the pain from my head leaning harshly over the cold, hard arm rest. This is it, I thought. This is how I die. Just like that, the blade slipped in to my neck. I didn’t feel anything but the blood gushing over my hands.

Then I woke up.

My hands were still wrapped around my neck over an oddly coincidental ache as Maya was crying in the distance.