Van Life or Scam Life: The Shocking Hidden Truth Behind the Trend

(Disclaimer: What you are about to read could make you Happy, Hungry, Horny or Hiccupy. For this I offer no apology.)

Van life has become a popular trend, with many people choosing to sell their homes and live in tiny homes on wheels. The idea of freedom and adventure along with the prospect of lower monthly bills has attracted people of all ages, but what if this trend is not as innocent as it seems? What if the government and corporations are promoting van life to further their own agenda and make a profit? If so, would you be so quick to help them? After all, who owns the vehicle manufacturing and social media companies and who profits greatly from the sale of fuel?... Psst, come here and I'll give you a clue.

What if the government has been bought out by rich companies who now basically run the United Kingdom? They might, by way of the mainstream media (which they also own), encourage the public to sell their hard-earned homes and live in vans, boats, and other tiny-home structures, all in the name of freedom and affordability (and all whilst raising the price of everything). But the truth could be that this government and these corporations might also use this trend to take over the country and make a profit, grabbing land wherever they can; your land which they intend to rent back to you in the future once your van life has become stuck in a swamp of legislation. After all, they've done this with our food, where the forest once stood and provided for all, a feudalistic fuckfest flourishes; peddling poisonous plums to the paupers. Food already comes at a price, freedom as we have come to know it may be next. Yet rather than our liberty being squashed the old-fashioned way, by an invading imperialistic neighbour (sorry if you are reading from Ukraine), our freedoms are being slowly eroded from within by our elected officials; like an acid-filled tumour corrupting the body.

One of the contributing factors to the development of this dystopian-sounding future is the Ultra Low Emission Zone (ULEZ) and the push towards 15-minute Cities. The ULEZ has been implemented in certain areas of London, with plans to expand it across the entire UK. This policy requires vehicles to meet certain emissions standards and those that don't have to pay a daily fee to enter the zone. This policy directly affects those who may choose to or have no choice but to live in a van, as they may not have the funds to upgrade their vehicle to meet the required standards. This could result in them being unable to travel or park in certain areas, limiting their freedom and mobility. It may also lead to an increase in homelessness if people are forced to leave their vans which for some, are their only home. Or, in my case, a cheap place to sleep after a night out drinking. Guess it'll be back to sleeping in wheelie bins for me again.

Another contributing factor is Agenda 2030 and the banning of fossil fuels. The government has promised to end the sale of new petrol and diesel cars and vans by 2030 in a bid to reduce carbon emissions. This policy directly affects those who choose to live in a van, as they rely on diesel to power their vehicles. After all, electric vehicles are an overpriced joke and arguably cause more pollution than they are trying to prevent. This coupled with the fact that there'll never be enough electric charge points for everyone, should start to make you think. We are all going to be either logistically, financially or legislatively restricted from driving, but for Van Life, it could be the end of the road. Once the last drop of diesel has been pumped and the fuel tanks run dry, government-owned trailer parks and campsites may become the final resting places of the once wild, free-roaming campervans. Like a living museum exhibit, similar to the ones you visited on school trips as a kid, Van lifers may become a thing of spectacle and inquiry used to educate the youth of tomorrow about life in the past.

"What are you doing mister?"

"Piss off kid, I'm washing my underpants."

Additionally, the 15-minute City initiative aims to create neighbourhoods where everything is within a 15-minute walk or bike ride. While this may seem like a positive development, it could directly affect van life as people are discouraged from travelling long distances, potentially to the point of penalization. With so much of Van Life being about exploring new places, this agenda could inhibit freedom and potentially even bring about the banning of diesel vehicles in towns altogether. This initiative could also lead to the government buying up more land in the cities and restricting access to those who choose to live in a van, forcing people back into controlled renting schemes by restricting car parks and overnight camping spots, something already being enforced by many local councils.

Agents of the government and corporations are perpetuating the idea of a glamorous van life through social media and other means. They are encouraging people to sell their homes and live in a van, telling them that they will have more freedom, more money and less stress. But in reality, they could be being fooled into giving up their homes, their land and their security. The government is also making it difficult for people to own land by creating more rules and regulations that make it difficult for people to build their own homes and too expensive, particularly for young people, to buy them. This will result in people being forced to rent land from the government or private landlords more interested in property portfolios than people. In this possible future, you may be fined or imprisoned for breaking the rules by living in unauthorised vehicles in undesignated places, even if you're forced to do so due to crippling living costs.

In conclusion, while van life may seem like a great way to escape the rat race and live a more free and adventurous life, it could in fact turn out to be a well-disguised rat trap. It is important to be aware of the government and corporations' true intentions. They could be promoting van life in the name of freedom whilst at the same time taking over the country to make a profit, using policies such as ULEZ and the push towards 15-minute cities to further their agenda. Don't fall for the scam of van life. Own your own land and home if you can, and don't let the government and corporations take it away from you. If however, like me, you can't afford a house and have already committed to living in a van or a boat, then enjoy it while it lasts I say and document it well my friends, for we may be the last generation to be able to do so.

Maybe Van Life should be renamed Van Dying as perhaps we are experiencing its final years. The desire for exploration has always existed, it's in our blood. And like an old person rallying to a miraculous recovery in their final days, the Camper Van reignited that flame, the desire to explore, burning like the fire-lit torches of our ancestors who sought to illuminate the dark corners of this world. The Campervan made possible once again that feeling of freedom not felt since before the first fence, wall or no camping sign was erected. Sadly, like a stallion tamed of its wildness, the option of a nomadic life for most people may soon be coming to an end. Yes, the humble home on wheels could soon be a thing of the past or maybe society will crumble before that happens and we'll all be living in vans in a Mad Max style cannibal infested apocalypse sooner than we think, only time will tell (fingers crossed).

This work of Faction (a mess of fact and fiction) was brought to you today by Jacobie Jones.

Thanks for reading.