nothingness

Nothingness.

Have you ever passed through all of your senses and fallen into the true depth of nothingness? We think that because we look, something is there. The world is filled with so much... stuff. Therefore, it must all be real. We think because we hear it that it makes it real. Sound only exists because we experience it. This could go for all the senses.

I once sat in long meditation and I took idle notice of the cars that constantly drove past my back window. I first noticed the soft, subtle hum. Then louder and louder. The accelerator brought them into more conscious focus. The sound peaked as they were right outside my door. And then it subtly faded away into nothingness. It came just as soon as it went.

Here's what I noticed. That car didn't exist to me before I heard it. It had no factual presence and no reality. It was only when I was able to perceive it and experience it as sound did it finally exist as something. And, just as soon as it was there, it wasn't. It once again slipped into the veil of nonexistence. From unknown, to known, back to unknown

I understand that this may seem like nothing more than the tireless philosophical question that "if a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" But truly when you experience sound in relation to nothingness, the answer becomes more clear and unavoidable. Nothing really exists. Everything is only perceivable in relation to our experience of it.

Oh sweet nothingness.

I remember hearing about this concept years ago as I was starting to explore Eastern philosophies and spiritual practices. Like most, I felt terrified by this concept. And more so, confused beyond all end. What do you mean nothing exists? You say that emptiness is the right path? But how in the world is everything here if it's all emptiness? A thinking mind will try so hard to apply rationality to this concept. Luckily, it's not intellectual thought that will bring you to the acceptance of this. There's no level of intelligence that you are missing that is preventing you from experiencing this truth at any time. It is only with silence of the mind is attained that true understanding can be reached.

I used to sit and imagine my thoughts being taken away by the currents of the ocean. Every time a thought wandered into my scope, I slowly let it drift back as quickly as it came. Eventually, it was within this peaceful silence that the true answers simply presented themselves to me. It wasn't thoughts per say. More so, it was just this subtle knowing.

In the void where nothing exists, answers can be found. I am by no means a master of this, nor trying to project my experiences as a medal of achievement for my ego. This is simply my observation. And being able to write about it has offered me an even deeper sense of clarity and understanding. They sometimes say that once you start having little moments of awakening, you can never again go back. It must be because the real truths of existence are so profound and visceral that they almost kill off any and all old misunderstandings.

This life offers us an opportunity to have many of these mind-altering, course correcting experiences. I find it beautiful that every one of us is capable of having these moments specific to their own journey and I adore hearing about all of them. To those seeking deeper truths, it starts with nothingness. When you find peace in that, the universe will speak to you.