What Does Evolving Sexuality Mean?
And is it just a phase?
Is there such a thing as evolving sexuality? A good portion of people are still raised with the idea that sexual orientation is a strict binary, you like men or you like women. It is seen as fairly static, only one of the two options, and unlikely to change over the course of someone's life. That is not always the case and it's not strange for someone to be attracted to different types of people throughout their lives. It's also fairly common to be attracted to people outside the accepted societal binaries.
Why would we do this? Because it's perfectly natural to have evolving sexuality and identity. We change our attitudes, feelings, and thoughts about countless other things throughout life. We acquire new tastes and discard older ones. Our sexuality and sexual preferences are no different. There are a number of different sexual orientations that may speak to us. What calls to us may also change throughout our lifespan.
Does Everyone Experience An Evolving Sexuality?
Sexual orientation and preferences are an extremely personal thing. Not everyone will feel the need to question who they feel attracted to. Some people are quite comfortable sticking with the common society standard. There is nothing wrong with this. There is also nothing wrong with questioning. The expression of different strokes for different folks really applies here. Your personal journey has little to do with the journey of everyone else. It's really about what is going to make you happy and feel comfortable in your own skin.
Questioning sexuality can be a confusing, and sometimes isolating, time for many. Much of mainstream media is geared towards heterosexual couples. Folks who do not experience the same desires as those expressed by their peers may feel like there is something wrong with them, especially when they are younger. The important thing to remember is that it's perfectly natural to be one of the questioning folks. Nature is full of examples of different types of sexuality. LGBTQA is expressed in different ways throughout the entire animal kingdom.
Is Sexuality Always Evolving? Or Is It Just a Phase?
The journey for everyone is different. How much experimentation and change occurs depends on the experiences a person has and how they are impacted by them. Our upbringing and current environment also play significant roles with our level of comfort and ability to experiment. All these factors change the journey of self-discovery for every single person. The journey ends when and where the person taking it decides they feel comfortable in who they are and who they are attracted to or they wish to stop exploring. For some people, this is a journey that takes a whole lifetime.
Whether or not a particular sexual preference or orientation is a phase can only be determined by that individual. Often the phrase, "it's just a phase," is used to diminish our experience. It can be belittling to those who are experiencing something new. If anyone feels unsure about exploring a different area of their sexuality, hearing this from a lover, friend, or family member can be devastating. Overall the phrase tends to be more harmful than helpful.
Don't Be Afraid of Your Own Evolving Sexuality
The more questions we ask ourselves, the more we come to learn about ourselves. Whatever level you feel that your sexuality is fluid, don't be afraid to ask yourself what you truly desire. You don't need to act on it. You don't need to change how you are living your life. The choice is always yours. You have the power to decide what it means to you. Examining how you feel can simply help you understand yourself better. It may lead you to better relationships and increase your overall happiness. Who wouldn't like to be happier?
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