Kissing the Coronavirus??

Have you ever had a sex dream? I think it is safe to say that most people will answer that question with a hushed (or maybe a loud and proud) yes. But have you ever had a sex dream about a disease? I'm going to assume that most people will answer this one with a solid no. Well never have I, but now none of us need to because there is this book called "Kissing the Coronavirus" that will make all our never thought of sexual desires come true.

If you have not yet read this book, please be warned that this commentary will contain ALL the spoilers. The book is only 15 pages long so it will be kind of hard for me not to spoil everything while doing a book commentary.

Before I start with the commentary, I just want to set the mood on how I even ended up reading this interesting book. It was a crisp autumn night, or October 1st, 2020 to be exact (I checked my message history) and I was already laying in bed all tucked in for the night. My friend messaged me on Facebook with a screenshot of the book being sold on Amazon along with a "LOL, WTF". At first, my thoughts echoed that of my friend's, but then I was a little (ok a lot) intrigued. I read the summary of the book and saw that it was only 15 pages. Oh and the genre is viral-erotica. I proceeded to share the screenshot of this book with some of my other friends to spread the "LOL, WTF" moment with them. Afterwards, I tried to continue on with my life but my curiosity got the best of me and for the steep price of $1.99, I bought the book from Amazon.

So are you ready for the wildest ride of your life? Both figuratively and literally (wink, wink). It begins with a female scientist, Dr. Alexa Ashingtonford, in a lab holding a test tube which contains a sample of the Coronavirus in it. For some unknown reason, she is incredibly turned on by it, comparing it to an erect penis. Ok, maybe there was a reason and it was because she hasn't been with a man in a long time. I don't know about the legitimacy of that reasoning but then again, I am no scientist so maybe scientists get turned on by science? Anyways, she decided that she wants to touch herself with it and proceeds to take her pants off and slides her panties aside and because her pussy was so wet, the lace of her panties "glided across her skin like a fat man on a water slide". Well that really killed the hot and steamy mood. And if that didn't kill it for you, well her boss walked into the lab at that moment so she had to stop. Dr. Bob Gurtlychund, her boss, had brought in new test samples for her to catalogue. This is where we learn that there used to be more scientists in the lab working on a cure for the virus, but they had all succumbed to the virus and her and her boss are the only two left. She also had a thought about banging her boss right then and there but didn't. I know that having sex at work may be a fantasy of many, but I feel like in a lab, it could end extremely disastrous. Imagine being in a heat of passion and then accidentally knocking over a bunch of test tubes. Or if you are on the ground and there were uncleaned chemicals that touched your bare skin and you started having a bad reaction. Once again, I am no scientist but these are the disastrous situations I imagine could occur.

Fast forward a couple pages of Alexa day dreaming about sex, she finally finishes cataloguing the samples. It turns out all the data was perfect which meant that their vaccine was ready for clinical trials. But all was not right as Alexa somehow knew that the vaccine did not have COVID-19 in it. I hate to say that once again, I am no scientist, but this sounds very unscientific. How did you come up with the vaccine for COVID-19? Oh, I just knew. Regardless, she added some more virus to the test tube that contained the vaccine. Now, will the vaccine work or will it kill more people? Only the clinical trials will tell... not. Bob returns and Alexa updates him on her findings and tells him that the vaccine is ready for the clinical trails. But Bob says, "No". Then he grabs the vaccine, puts it into a syringe and injects himself with it. Here comes the first plot twist, why did he do it you ask? Well go read the book and find out. Just kidding, you could probably already guess why, it is because he has the virus. And this next part actually made me laugh out loud because when Bob admitted that he had the virus is when Alexa suddenly realized that they were not practicing social distancing. LOL. I don't know why I found that extremely hilarious, but I did.

After about two pages of transformation, Bob becomes the Coronavirus (man?). There were some descriptions of what he looked like but the most important part was the "bulge in his trousers the size of a medium-length python". Man oh man, Alexa was about to get wrecked. So now she is having an internal crisis between her desire to have sex with the Coronavirus and her concern of contracting the virus herself. But, plot twist number 2, Alexa is immune. This is according to a sense that the Coronavirus man had. But honestly, why would we not trust the virus itself/himself to be able to know what it/he can kill. Then, she realized that she was probably the one who infected her boss due to their lack of social distancing measures and thus was the cause of his death. The guilt lasted for a literal two sentences and was replaced with the longing of fucking the virus man.

And thus they fucked. I won't give you the details here, if you really want them, you'll have to go discover them yourself.

Overall I have to say that it provided a good 30minutes of solid entertainment. And guess what, there is now a sequel!!!!!