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15 Sexy Roleplays for Nerdy Couples

When fandom and sex mix together, some truly sexy (and maybe a little crazy) roleplays can turn a nerdy couple's sex life up to eleven.

By Bethany TiamatPublished 7 years ago 12 min read
Ravenclaw's better.

Nerdy couples can sometimes share some of their favorite fandoms, but maybe, with a few clever roleplays, they can share more than just that. There are many jokes about nerds and their sex lives, but most everyone realizes that few people are as creative in bed as sexy nerds. We all know that when your nerdy partner's eyes light up and they start babbling about that thing they like, it is the cutest and hottest thing in the world.

So let's combine their excitement outside and inside the bedroom. When fandom and sex mix together, some truly sexy (and maybe a little crazy) roleplays can turn a nerdy couple's sex life up to eleven.

Super Mario Roleplay: Peach Bakes Mario a Cake

"Ooooh, Mama Mia! Here we go!"

Mario has saved Princess Peach a million times over, and every time the Princess rewards him with... a cake. Seems like little after traveling through eight worlds, fighting Bowser's minions and the big guy himself.

For this Super Mario Bros roleplay, you and your partner need to dress up as Mario and Peach. (If Mario doesn't feel comfortable dressing up as a chubby short male, you can substitute Mario with Luigi or Daisy).

Peach brings Mario home to bake a cake. From here, the roleplay can take two paths. One is that Peach leads Mario to the bedroom, and disrobes before him (or her) to present him (or her) with a "cake." Whipped cream on either breast that Mario must lick off.

The other path is that Peach simply makes Mario a cake, and hand feeds it to him (or her). Simple cakes can take minutes to make. From there, Mario is undressed so he (or her) can be made "comfortable." And, from there... well, use your imagination.

Ultimately, both options lead down the path of sexy roleplay for two nerds craving for one another, hungry for one another's taste.

Star Wars Roleplay: Jedi Know No Love

"Ani? My goodness, you've grown."

You ever watch Attack of the Clones? Remember how that movie establishes that "Jedi can know no love?" You remember how Padme, despite knowing Anakin can't have sexy times, keeps wearing increasingly sexy outfits? This is so ridiculous that Robot Chicken made a sketch making fun of that.

But... why not use that as erotic fuel? Use it to fuel your own personal Star Wars Sexy Roleplay?

One of you must pose as a Jedi, being seduced by a sexily dressed individual. If you want, you can make the other person a sexy alien, though that may require a lot of time and patience to put that costume together. Simply try to see how long the two of you can spend time with each other without acknowledging how sexy the other person is. After all, a Jedi cannot know love...

See how long you can last being in your partner's presence without touching that sexy booty. Go ahead. See how long it takes.

All that pent up energy will drive you crazy, and, thus, drive you into an intense sexy nerdy time. Then you can put your Boba Fett in her Sarlaac Pit.

Sailor Moon Roleplay: In the Name of the Sailor Moon

"In the name of the moon, I will punish you."

The romantic Sailor Moon anime features some pretty incredible sequences of fantasy and magic that left countless with sweet dreams for years.

So now it's time to soil all that with dirty roleplay.

You and your partner can dress up as any number of Sailor Moon characters. Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask? If you aren't up for a hetero pair, don't forget that Sailor Moon is pretty bisexual in her series. Gender cannot stand in the way of this sexy nerdy roleplay. If you want your male partner to put on a Sailor uniform, go for it. Whatever makes you two feel powerful.

And, from there, things get tricky. One of you could be "corrupted" by some dark force, and it's up to Sailor Moon to purify them with the power of love. Get ready for some goofy little exchanges. Even better if you have sex toys decorated as items from Sailor Moon. A vibrator designed after her Crescent Wand?

Either way, you may either start laughing over how silly the whole thing is or really trapped in each other's arms. That, or be prepared to be punished in the name of the moon.

Harry Potter Roleplay: It's LeviOOooohsa, not LevioSAAAAAaah

"So you'll suffer... but you'll be happy about it."

Harry Potter remains a classic among all nerds in this world. For many people, it was their first introduction to fandom. We found this series at a special time. A time when we little nerds were learning how about other things that made us happy. Sexually happy.

So now it's time for another nerdy sexy roleplay.

For this sexy Harry Potter Roleplay, you are both Hogwarts students. Pick a house (preferably, the house Pottermore sorted you into), roleplay as a student of that house, and meet with a study partner to learn a new charm.

But one of you keeps messing up, and articles of clothing just keep disappearing. ("It's LeviOOooohsa, not LevioSAAAAAaah") Mock embarrassment, before you two start getting a little closer.

For extra fun, roleplay your house. Embody the most stereotypical traits of that house. Ravenclaws--be studious, clever, and smart. Gryffindors--reckless over-the-top bravado. Hufflepuffs--be mother hens. And Slytherins--be clever, sarcastic nerds. I know there is more to these houses than those traits, but this is sexual roleplay, not serious fandom discussion. Have fun with it.

Wonder Woman Roleplay: The Lasso

"I don't think you've ever met a woman like me before."

Wonder Woman's creator, William Marston, was a polygamist who was seriously into bondage. Why do you think Wonder Woman's primary weapon is a lasso that ties people down?

Time for you to embody those fantasies.

Suggest to your partner to do a sexy Wonder Woman roleplay. One of you must dress up as Wonder Woman. As I'm sure you know by now, it does not matter what your gender is. That suit is going to make you feel powerful and hot, clasped tight around your hips and nipples.

Now, bind up your partner. Probably he or she has been bad, and you need to get a confession out of him or her. Now, with that Lasso of Truth ensnaring him or her, he or she must tell the absolute truth to any questions you ask. Aaaaany at all.

Oh, and the Lasso can make the other person obedient to you. Tell him or her to do whatever you want, and he or she must obey. (Within reason, of course. Please, respect your partner's wishes.)

Then, switch. You both deserve to feel powerful in that outfit.

Star Trek Roleplay: Klingon Mating Rituals

"We Klingons often tout our prowess in battle...[but] honor gives little comfort to a man alone in his home..."

Few cultures have permeated the mainstream like the Klingons. Versions of Shakespeare's plays have been published in Klingon, for Christ's sake.

So why not enact the Klingon mating rituals with your partner? This Star Trek Roleplay is perfect for the nerdy couple running on a Star Trek high.

So, first you need to watch The Next Generation episode "The Emissary." Not for the sex, but because it's Star Trek, and you two nerds know it's awesome.

Then, you start up with the ritual. First, combative foreplay! Fight each other! Sniff each other's hands, and then squeeze 'em. Make 'em bleed--break the bones--

And then you throw heavy objects at each other as one of you tries to read poetry. And by heavy objects, I mean pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals.

Also, please play nice. Be rough, but not brutal. A broken clavicle may be good luck for Klingons, but for people it just hurts like hell.

From there, you must shove each other to the floor, and, in a fierce mating dance, exert dominance over one another, struggling and heaving over one another to make sure you sit on top. Only when bested can you consent to taking it from your partner.

True Blood Roleplay: Vampire Sex

Any vampire fiction will do for this one, really. Buffy, Twilight, Vampire Chronicles... or Nosferatu.

This isn't too complicated. One of you is a vampire, and the other is an innocent person. Roleplay that. Lots of biting.

If you want, this can be a pretty fun True Blood roleplay. One of you is a slayer, while the other is a vampire. Vampire, play up the whole seducer thing as you draw in, saying sweet words. Slayer, turn your partner down onto a bed to "stake" him or her when you think your partner is about to pounce.

If you pounce before he or she stakes you, sweet vampire, then you are in control, ravaging him or her as you see fit. But if you fail, dear vampire, then you're the one submitting to the greater power.

From there, you undergo some intense vampire sex. Either the vampire is being mounted by the slayer, or the vampire is in control. Either way, one partner must submit to the victor, and, as you two couple, stare up at your nerdy partner as he or she takes command of your body, running their fingers up along your chest and belly, and, if the vampire is in charge, feel his or her breath on the underside of your jaw as teeth press up against your trembling neck...

Lara Croft Roleplay: Naked Adventure!

Lara Croft: Panty Raider

This one is even sillier. Prepare for a naked adventure as every teenage boy's (and some girl's) sexy fantasy.

But, unlike most nerdy sexy roleplays, this one involves you trying put your clothes back on.

One of you is going to dress up as Lara Croft--star of the popular video game series. The other one will be naked. You would have hidden your clothing around the house, and it is up to Lara to find it all.

Any sexy outfit you have, Lara now has to find it, and dress you up in it. Sometimes, putting clothing on can be just as sexual as taking them off, especially if Lara is bending over to draw your jeans on, and her nose brushes close to your pelvis. Lips and tongue very close.

One you're dressed, Lara can then rip your clothes off. Or you can go on with your day, depending, and move on from this hot Lara Croft Roleplay.

Silent Hill 2 Roleplay: Pyramid Head

"They look like monsters to you?"

Some sexy roleplays have you fit in the shoes of the characters you fantasized since you were a kid. This time, step in the shoes of someone you were conditioned to fear above all else.

Time for some Silent Hill 2 Roleplay. Surprise! You're having sex with Pyramid Head.

You put a giant pyramid-shaped box on your head, and take your partner. You then ride them up against the wall, going at them from the rear.

This nerdy roleplay is of course in reference to that scene in Silent Hill 2 where you walk in on Pyramid Head fucking some strange, unusual monster.

For extra fun, bring in a third person who walks in on this, stunned--and then you, you monster, take the third person, and add him to the monster mash...

Game of Thrones Roleplay: You Know Nothing

"You know nothing, Jon Snow."

Sexy roleplays usually lead couples to fulfilling fantasies they could not normally experience under normal circumstances. Odd, then, how so many fantasy stories--full of characters nerds lust over--feature characters who are not supposed to have sex.

Similar to the Jedi, the Night's Watch from Game of Thrones are celibate. In theory, anyway. We all know Jon Snow--a master of knowing nothing--ends up having a close relationship with Ygritte. It's a taboo relationship that breaks every rule of the Night's Watch.

So it's time to roleplay that relationship now.

One of you can be Jon Snow, and the other Ygritte. Or, if you're less comfortable with those two, any Night's Watch with any Wildling. Hell, you can be Sam and Mance if you're so inclined. Point is, one of you is a sexual being, while the other is supposed to remain married to your job.

We all know that a little seduction can bring some warmth to your colder bits, right?

Best done in a cold environment, so you two need to get close together to heat up. Rub against one another for friction to stroke heat back into your stiff bodies. Get hot. Get bothered.

And then, once you're both breathing hard, you sheathe your bastard sword.

Bonus points if you tell your partner at the end, "You know nothing."

Legend of Zelda Roleplay: The Ocarina of Time

"It's dangerous to go alone. Take this!"

Legend of Zelda is a perfect game saga. Everyone knows that Link's Ocarina of Time can work magic, but can it part a person's legs? We may never find out for sure, but you can "uncover" the secret with this Legend of Zelda Roleplay.

In this nerdy sexy roleplay, one of you nerds plays Link, and the other Princess Zelda (or Shiek, if you prefer. Or Ganondorf, but that would be odd.). Link has his (or her) Ocarina, and, by playing, can trigger any number of things.

Decide a simple tune for the following orders to your partner. One tune--take off an article of clothes. Another--oral. Lay prone and vulnerable. Talk dirty. Any number of things, but prepare the tunes. When you play, your partner does it.

Now, for this, you don't need an ocarina. It is sexier if you play an instrument, but you can use your cell phone just as well. This auditory sex roleplay is a delight for any nerd.

Doctor Who Roleplay: Sonic Screwdriver

I like bowties. Bowties are cool.

Doctor Who has been bringing the dreams of nerds to the small screen for years. Many of the Doctor's companions have pined for him, but now it's time for you to reap your oats with your nerdy, sexy partner.

Yes, we like sexy Doctor Who roleplays. Sexy Doctor Who roleplays are cool.

One of you needs to dress up as the Doctor from Doctor Who. There are multiple outfits for you to choose from. If you want, you can change into a different one when you need to "regenerate." (Read: recover between orgasms.)

It is necessary for you to take a vibrator for this one. This will be your sonic screwdriver, and... you know where this is going.

You need to save your partner from some strange mechanism inside of him or her. To do this, you need to put your sonic screwdriver deep inside his or her body. Let it buzz through their system. Let it rumble up the flesh.

Just do it as long as you need be, until he or she goes all over you, and ejects that pesky mechanism out of their system.

Lord of the Rings Roleplay: Hobbit Life

"What about second breakfast?"

Lord of the Rings remains one of the greatest nerdy stories ever concocted. Maybe you and your partner are up for a comfortable, easy day of cozy cuddles. This is perhaps the most mild and comfortable of all these "sexy" roleplays.

For this Lord of the Rings roleplay, you two nerds will be living the Hobbit Life. Basically, you spend a whole day living like a hobbit. Which means... yes, you will eat seven meals spread out across the day, and spend the majority of it cuddling. Now, by "seven meals" we clearly don't mean full-blown meals. More just erotic snacks and cuddles.

And, by erotic snacks, I mean you eat off each other's bodies.

Strip your partner down, and put some cookies or chocolate chips on their tummy and chest. Eat them off, and then reward your partner with some erotic rubbing. Massage them. Kiss them. Hobbits are sweet creatures, so this roleplay is more about making your partner as cozy and warm as possible.

The sexy side here is, of course, the casual interplay between mundane and sexual. You can slip between cuddles, snacking, and fucking with little transition. Sometimes at once. Oh, and naps. Don't forget lots of naps and cuddling.

Rubix Cube Roleplay: The Lament Configuration

We have such sights to show you.

Warning: the following sexy roleplay is for advanced nerds only. This one crosses far too many lines for nerdy couples of normal levels of perversion. Know your limits.

This is a Hellraiser Sexy Roleplay.

The Lament Configuration from Hellraiser is a box with untold secrets and pleasures for those who have grown bored of life's perversions. Do not start this game thoughtlessly.

Solve the puzzle of the Lament Configuration (a Rubix Cube will do). Closer you get to solving it, your partner, the Cenobite--dressed in leather with some sick "piercings" or something--will draw nearer to "reward" you for solving the Box.

Once it's solved, it's time for some whips and chains. I don't want to recommend you go full-Hellraiser. That usually involves flesh pealing off bone and eternal damnation. That would be a little sick. Just make sure you show your partner the joy of flesh. Enough to leave them a little raw.

Then again, if that sounds like a sexy idea, you're probably the kind of kinky type who likes being hurt. Just please remember your safe word.


About the Creator

Bethany Tiamat

I love three things: books with yellowed pages, long walks on beaches with my german shepard Dany, and dishes incorporating fried onions.

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