Xavier

Love; What really is love? Is it really a necessity? Does love at first sight even exist? If it does then why are we subjected to loving another when the initial person we loved betray us? Isn’t love meant to be infinite?

Yea, sorry, am asking too many questions again, am only asking cause am confused and have found myself in a dilemma. Okay, here’s my story, maybe, just maybe then you’ll understand the reason for all these questions and then you might have answers to my questions.

It was a rainy night, but I decided to take a stroll anyways, its been a while since I felt that rain on my skin and I missed that feeling. I was just walking with no particular destination in mind, I focused on the sound of the rain cause it tends to keep the voices in my head at bay, I wasn’t really paying attention to my environment. I returned to my senses when I suddenly stooped, feeling the rain's comfort. Why did it stop? That was fast, I looked up and saw an umbrella above my head as I wanted to lay curses on whatever it was that made the rain to stop. What’s going on? How did this get here? I looked for the hand holding the umbrella cause am obviously not the one holding it, yea there it is, I traced the hand to the face, and that was when I saw him, he was tall, had stormy eyes that enthralled and held its beholder in a trance, calling out to come closer, it was like everything stopped, I was lost in his eyes. “ Hey” Oh my God his voice was so deep I could listen to it all day long and still want more. “Hello, are you even listening to me? Why are you out in the rain, you could get sick you know?” he said still looking at me, “ oh yea, sorry I got carried away, what did you say again?” I said as I came back from daydreaming.

“You know what? Never mind, come on let’s go” he said dragging me away from the rain. “erm if you don’t mind, I will have to take you to my place since it's just around the corner, you need to change into another cloth and also have a warm bath, then you can tell me why you were outside in the rain by this time of the night”.

He really took care of me that night without questions, I can still remember it like it was yesterday, he just listened to me as I poured out my heart to him and he gave me his shoulder to cry on. We grew close, and as time went on, he asked me to be his, well I said yes cause he was all I ever needed, he brought out the best part of me and so did I to him. Well, let me tell you being with him was full of bliss, but little did I know that it was a calm before the storm.

After so many years of being together, everything fell apart; I was at home trying to do some house chores and prepare for work when an unknown number called, I picked up and it was a woman’s voice I heard “ Hello, is this Tito?”, okayyy “ yea it is, who is this and how may I help you?”. “Oh well that’s good then, cause if this is Tito then am speaking with my husband’s mistress”, shocked, confused, and surprised, I didn’t really know what to feel at that point, “ Are you sure of what you’re saying cause Xavier can never do that to me, we’ve been together for three years,” I said as tears started streaming down from my eyes, I tried to control it but I couldn’t. “ Yea well, I know that it’s hard for you to believe, I know that you have been with him for three years. We actually got married last two years and two days ago I found out that he had a mistress that he has been with even before we got married and decided to call and warn you, but I can see that you’re clueless about this whole thing, anyways, you know the right thing to do, Xavier needs to focus on his wife and unborn child” she said as she hung up. At that point my world came crushing and crashing down, I couldn’t breathe properly, I literally felt my heart tearing into shreds; but why? I gave him everything, why would he do this to me? My whole body was shivering as I felt the darkness creeping back slowly to take its place. You know, I haven’t seen him since then, the least he could do was to leave a letter for me saying that he was sorry, I haven’t been myself since then.

Now I ask again, what is love?