Thorns and Roses

Walking on the lonely streets, I was feeling the stress and frustration from work coupled with the pain and heavy burden that I have to carry every day, it’s weighing me down, and I don’t know what to do.

You know, I used to think that life was easy as a child, not that I got everything I asked for, but life was easier then; I always thought that life was a bed of roses, but I grew up to see the sharp thorns on it. I failed to see it, and it stung me; I have been tryna recover but to avail; I am falling slowly, falling slowly into the dark with no light at the end cause I am not falling into a tunnel but an endless void; I have been feeling empty and floating lately, and I just want everything to stop, sometimes I don’t even feel anything. Yea, I know, carried away again by my thoughts as usual. Looking around, I wondered why the streets were empty today and why none of my business as long as I got home safely. Suddenly in my absentmindedness, I heard a voice “Hey!, Hey there, wait up!” I looked back to see if the person was referring to me; I saw a beautiful lady running towards me, panting heavily. She said,” Hey, what’s up? I have been calling you for the past 30mins. Where is your mind at?” I was still looking at her, confused cause why was she talking to me? She was around her twenties and had this beautiful contagious smile on her face, and to my utmost surprise, warmed my heart; I found myself unconsciously smiling back at her, “ hi my name is Stella,” she said, stretching out her hand for a handshake,” my name is Tito” I replied shaking her back. “So where are you headed to? I saw you from the corner; you weren’t looking alright to me. Are you okay” Stella asked with a worried look on her face; I wondered why a stranger was worried about my face not being bright “ I am fine. To work has been hectic, and I am headed home, though I am almost there.” Still smiling, she said,” Oh, alright then, do you mind me walking with you?” still marveling and in disbelief, I said, “ yea, sure, I don’t mind at all,” and that was how I became friends with Stella. We grew pretty much close; Stella made it easy for me to open up to her; she became my backbone and gave me comfort; she made me feel safe around her; it was just always warm around her. There’s this aura of satisfaction and contentment I had whenever I was around her. Stella taught me how to live again; she always said,” Tito, it’s okay not to be okay, it’s okay to cry sometimes, no need to act all tough and strong, you do not need to prove anything to anybody, be yourself and live one day at a time, there’s always hope.”

I held onto those words and started coming out more, smiling more often; the spark in my eyes came back, and my face had this glow on it.

One day, Stella came to visit, and while we got all comfy, she told me that she was relocating back to where she came from cause her task or mission here was done; I cried so hard that evening cause I didn’t want her to go cause who will I always go to when I start falling again? On whose shoulder would lean? Stella looked at me and wiped my tears, and said, “ Hey, I might not be around for you anymore, but you are one of the strongest persons that I know; you can do anything you set your mind to, do not let the thorns sting you again and even if they do, heal, if you stumble, stand back if you fall, get back up, dust yourself up and keep moving. Lives will journey, the strong will survive it, only the strong will survive it, never you forget that”.

Stella might not be here with me anymore, but her words still comfort me to this day, and it's been what has kept me going.