Walking sided by side in the dark

It is often said that people, especially those who love each other, should know and understand each other, and preferably be transparent to each other and have a heart to heart. Schweitzer, however, says in "My Teenage Years" (for a Chinese translation, see the book "Awe of Life" translated by Chen Zehuan) that this is impossible, and even if it were possible, no one has the right to make such demands of others. "Not only is there physical shame, but there is also spiritual shame, which we should respect. The mind also has its trappings, and we should not take them off." As with the mystery of God, so with the mystery of another person's soul, we cannot read and know it as if it were a book that belongs to us, but can only give love and trust. Each person is a secret to others, and we should accept this fact. People who love each other are only "walking side by side in the darkness", and all they can do is to strive for the light in their hearts, and to feel this effort and encourage each other, without "looking into the faces and hearts of others".

I was speechless and impressed reading these wonderful arguments, which gave me a glimpse of the depth of Schweitzer's "fear of life" ethic. Anyone who has a deep and rich inner life is bound to be aware of the mystery of all spiritual things and to be in awe of them, and Schweitzer was such a person. In his view, all living phenomena are the manifestation of some mysterious spiritual essence of the world, and thus he puts forward the idea of reverence for all life. Among all the phenomena of life, especially the life of human mind is the closest to this spiritual essence of the world. Thus, he believed that for those who fear the mysterious nature of the world, it is self-evident that they should "fear the spiritual nature of others.

The bull's-eye approach to interpersonal relations is rooted in a lack of understanding of the mystery of human spiritual life. According to this line of thought, people, on the one hand, value the understanding of others, and even openly ask for it. At least in sex, asking for understanding seems to be the most legitimate behavior, while accusing the other person of not understanding oneself becomes the harshest condemnation, and is sometimes used as an ultimatum before a breakup. On the other hand, people are very eager to ask for understanding, even in the name of forcing others to reveal everything in their hearts, and when they are refused, they denounce it as a lack of trust. In love, in affection, and in other more intimate interactions, do we see much of this audible or silent warfare caused by forcing understanding and being understood? But when you think about it, how much do we really understand about ourselves? When a person understands the difficulty of understanding himself, he will not force others to understand him completely, nor will he expect himself to understand others completely.

In our innermost spiritual life, we are all alone, and love does not eliminate this loneliness, but it is because we understand the loneliness of others from ourselves that we are filled with the most sincere love for them. We walk side by side in the darkness, on our own pilgrimage, unable to know whether we are walking to the same holy place, because we cannot tell others or even ourselves what the holy place in our hearts is really like. However, the same passion for pilgrimage makes us believe that there may be a holy place. This is where the greatness and tragedy of human beings, as beings with souls, lies.