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Unicorn and the Village

Because Dana Crandell made me do it.

By JBazPublished 3 months ago Updated 3 months ago 3 min read
28
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With-in the brightness of her horn lay the power to lay mankind to waste or rise them from the depths of despair.

She chooses death.

With hooves made of silver and a mane of gold she runs as fast as she can to the village that lay at the base of the mountain. For too long they hunted her kind, killing for little more then the rainbow-colored ivory protruding from their heads.

All night she trudges through the snows, damp from the exertion, her coat gleaming under the full moon. Her mind conjures all the things she will do to avenge her kin. Pierce them, stomp upon their flesh until bones crunch and the cold white beneath her hooves turns red.

As dawns glow crests the mountain, it's golden rays climb over the sheet of frozen cliffs, lighting up the tiny village below. Pausing, she watches as the town wakes. The children, giddy with excitement begin to play in the fresh fallen snow, rolling frozen balls and placing them on top of one another, they look like chubby humans. Their joy and laughter fill the morning air.

Gazing down on these helpless insignificant creatures, her heart softens. Thoughts of peace and forgiveness enter her mind. Could she explain to them the pain they were causing, would they understand? Perhaps things between their kind can be different, maybe there is a chance they can live in harmony.

They only need to talk, to have an honest conversation, misunderstandings may be forgotten in time, it may be possible to live together in peace.

Can this really work?

With graceful steps she approaches, sure and steady so as not to cause fear. Her head held high, the morning breeze tosses her mane, framing her majestic head.

From a distance she watches as people freeze in place as they see her approach. A tension blows upon the crisp air.

She knows she must speak first before they act in fear. Clearing her throat, to call out, a ray of light blinds her, while a whiff of smoke rising from the chimneys tickles her throat and nose. Before she can react a violent sneeze erupts from way down deep, its sound reverberates across the open field and echoes amongst the magnificent mountains. While ribbons of rainbow rays shoot from her horn, burning into the snow capped peeks.

It began with a low rumble, which grew into a roar. In moments, an avalanche of snow cascades down. Cloudless thunder cracks the morning peace and in seconds the village is buried beneath the flowing blizzard.

Standing in shock by the sudden event, she shrugs her mighty shoulders and thinks, that works too.

By Leo_Visions on Unsplash

Below is the inspiration that drove us to write these tales, a simple comment on Dana's page: After reading two sad stories written by Dana. (P.S. It appears Heather is somehow involved in this as well).

JBaz (to Dana)

Ok, your next story has to be rainbows and unicorns. My fragile mind is now distressed. Awesome work, you got my blood pumping

Reply

Dana Crandell

Dana Crandell (Author)

LOL I think you're right, I need to write something fluffy. Unicorns burning in the infrared band of a rainbow, coming right up! (I have no idea where my mind is these days, but I think it's Heather's fault.)

JBaz

Why am I suddenly interested in unicorns frying in the rays of a rainbow....Hmm I think you are on to something.

If you feel inspired to create a Unicorn & rainbow story between 600-650 words (For min. Word count) please join in.

This is not a challenge it is just for fun and not to be taken serious.

Only criteria is the subject line must be: Because Dana and JBaz made me do it.

FantasyFableMicrofiction
28

About the Creator

JBaz

I have enjoyed writing for most of my life, never professionally.

I wish to now share my stories with others, lets see where it goes.

Born and raised on the Canadian Prairies, I currently reside on the West Coast. I call both places home.

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  1. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

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Comments (25)

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  • Babs Iverson2 months ago

    Fun & entertaining!!! Love it!!!♥️♥️💕

  • Yep. That'll do, Uni. (paraphrasing "Babe") Nicely done, JBaz!

  • Holly Pheni3 months ago

    Yes! Revenge of the unicorns. So unique, I love it!

  • L.C. Schäfer3 months ago

    "That works too" - brilliant 😁 I almost went with revenge for my story today, as well. I was going to have the offended unicorn somehow burn down the family home.... Went a different way in the end 😁

  • Oneg In The Arctic3 months ago

    This is so funny and y'all are all great hahaha what a fun time

  • If fate and Karma had a child, uh - unicorn

  • Heather Hubler3 months ago

    Ah well, nature works itself out, right? HAHAHA!! The sneeze that ended civilization. What a crack up to go from the dramatic beginning to a fatal ending woven with humor in there. Loved this!

  • Novel Allen3 months ago

    Found this on Hannah's entry. Too much fun not to join in. I love it.

  • ROCK 3 months ago

    Haha, I don't know much about Unicorns but this gave me a good idea of what one is capable of. How serious does the piece need to be, btw?

  • Donna Fox (HKB)3 months ago

    I love this Jason (and Dana), this was fun and I will certainly be looking into some form of an entry to this!! Great work!!

  • Dana Crandell3 months ago

    I love that you took an entirely different approach with this AND that you encouraged everyone else to play. Even if it wasn't my fault. lol Great job, Jason!

  • J. R. Lowe3 months ago

    I came from Cathy’s take on this prompt straight to yours and I can see you’ve both approached it from a VERY different angle 😂. Nothing like a good unicorn revenge story, nicely done 👌

  • Hannah Moore3 months ago

    Love it. I'd love to join in but writing time is not opening itself too me lately. I thought I might have some today, but providence gifted me a poorly child instead...

  • Test3 months ago

    Can't quite believe I did this 😂 https://vocal.media/fiction/born-this-way-ij4h0yjv

  • Stephanie Hoogstad3 months ago

    That’s one powerful sneeze. I’ve got to say, I’ve seen depictions where rainbows come out of a unicorn’s rear, but never one that comes out of their nose and is powerful enough to cause an avalanche. Pretty awesome, actually. And that final line is absolutely hilarious. Love it. Great job.

  • Cathy holmes3 months ago

    hahaha. Oops. Oh well, at least she had good intentions.

  • Test3 months ago

    Super cute story and absolutely love the Dana Jbaz banter-Hillarious!

  • Thavien Yliaster3 months ago

    Silver hooves, golden manes, and rainbow ivory hooves? Goodness, two precious metals and a precious mineral that animals such as elephants are hunted for and no wonder humanity was so desperate to hunt them. With their capabilities of speech, they're too intelligent to domesticate. I was hoping that there'd be a few farms and ranches of unicorns cause has a resource go empty is just bad business practices, like a paper company destroying all the trees and not replanting any of them. Plants and animals are like resources that can always replenish themselves as long as they have the proper nutritional resources (sunlight included) and space. For those humans, like ours, to cause several species to go extinct, is beyond the stupidity of not planning ahead. That made me sad just like the extinction of the dragons in the universe of "A Song of Ice and Fire." I like how You didn't tone down the desire for bloodlust and the acts that she's thinking as she's approaching for vengeance. Being that it's the winter I gotta assume that all of the children are bundled up beneath tons of layers of warm clothing. Makes sense why they look like tiny chubby humans. Whenever I read that the kids always looked chubby I always think to myself, "I get that in the baby phase, but even toddlers and not every kid is chubby. I know I wasn't one when growing up, and I was well fed." It does warm my heart that she thought about forgiveness as soon as she saw the children. My dad and our neighbor don't always get along, but I became friends easily with my neighbor's children. My dad saw that as a sign that what the older generations cannot do to move past their issues the younger generation will be able to overcome. Then again, we were kids do we had no real responsibilities besides to stay alive, do well in school, and stay healthy. I was hoping that the unicorn would eventually return when she had a foal of her own and hope that the human children and her own foal would be able to grow up in times of peace. Goodness, reminds me of when I saw a deer the first time in the wild and how majestic it was. Yeah, humans living in that village must talk, yell, sneeze, and cough all the time and not have any avalanches from their noise, but a unicorn melting the snow that causes more to fall is an entirely different threat altogether. Well, hopefully some of those humans and their items will be preserved in the snow and discovered years later by archeologist. It'd be really cool if they had artifacts of unicorns too so those modern day humans would be able to tell if unicorns were real or not if unicorns may go extinct in the future. Sort of like what's happening now with mammoths and how we're trying to clone them and impregnate Asian elephants with mammoth embryos. The same could be done with unicorns. That natural disaster though, "Meh, close enough." It's a great sense of dark, morbid, humor. Nothing to descriptive, but also real enough because people have been buried beneath the snow. Great story JBaz.

  • Kenny Penn3 months ago

    Loved this story JBaz. It’s about time I got to read a Unicorn story that wasn’t like every other one 😂 Well done

  • Hahahahahahahaha you and Dana are so fun! I loved your story!

  • Mariann Carroll3 months ago

    This was very cute. Your daughter could have inspired this story? Your childhood imagination is still lurking inside of you. 🙂

  • Phil Flannery3 months ago

    That was lovely...at first. I could hear the Disney music playing as the children frolicked, the trumpets sound as the Unicorn appears, then they're all dead. No wonder the humans hate unicorns.

  • Mark Gagnon3 months ago

    I never thought about writing a unicorn story, but it has possibilities. Sneezes are contagious.

  • Mother Combs3 months ago

    💙I may have to try this out lol

  • John Cox3 months ago

    Delightful story. The final line is hoot!

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