Unbefitting

The throbbing beat of the music assaulted his senses as much as the view of the exotic dancers aroused his desires. He twisted in his seat and squirmed. He was totally out of his comfort zone that was very plain to see.

How he hated these work gatherings, he was only there so they could make fun of him and he knew it.

Trying to escape the room while focus was on the buxom brunette on the dancefloor was a possibility. He might make it out without further humiliation, but as he stood to leave he blindly stepped into the path of the scantily clad drinks waiter causing her tray of glasses to crash to the floor.

The drunken crowd cheered.

Fumbling to help her, he bent down apologising as their heads clashed forehead to forehead knocking the leg of his spectacles into her cleavage. For a moment he felt dizzy. Not knowing whether to retrieve his glasses or not, all he could do was stare.

Meet me outside in ten minutes, she whispered as she handed back his specs causing him to blush.

END

JUST MY LUCK !!

Vacuuming done, washing hung out, floors mopped, I was finally able to sit down on the couch for a quick bite of my sandwich when I felt the stab of a bone digging into my thigh from where it was wedged between the lumpy cushions. I reached in to grab it. The slimy dog slobber fresh with accumulated hairs didn’t register until I it was within eyesight. I threw it towards the dog bed as Zoey looked up from her sleep irked that I had found her stash.

Reaching for the box of tissues to wipe the residue of dog mucus from under my nails my sandwich slips from the plate landing upside down on the carpet.

“Of course,” I sigh.

I pick it up ingredient by ingredient inspecting each piece as I place it back into sandwich formation…. Ignorant of a cat hair or two I take my first bite.

The doorbell rings.

Clearing the last remnants of sandwich from my mouth I open the door to be greeted by Billy the eight-year-old from across the street. “Ethan, Billy’s here to play with you”, I call down the hallway. Ethan comes running and I close the door and head back to my sandwich.

The sandwich was gone. The overturned plate lay flat on the floor with nothing more than a tiny piece of crust remaining. I glare around the room for Zoey. There she was licking her lips with a what-did-I-do look on her face.

“Of course,” I sigh.

I flick on the TV for some mind-numbing drivel to help me forget about my sandwich. The remote works intermittently and I have to settle on a rerun of Seinfeld…. You know the episode, the one about the sandwich…… “this sandwich is making me thirsty” ….. no, wait, that was pretzels….

I must have sandwich on the brain.

“Of course,” I sigh.

The cat is at the glass door meowing to come in; it’s not her usual meow.

I get closer; I see she has something in her mouth. It’s a small animal…. A bird maybe? Is it still alive? I open the door to let the cat in.

In a flash of orange, the bird flies past me, I scream, the cat chases.

The poor little thing is frantic, it flies at the windows trying to get out. The cat intent on capturing its prey sends the dish rack crashing to the ground. She pounces at the window; I catch her on the way down, the bird in her mouth again.

“What’s happening Mum”, the boys’ probe. “Err, nothing….., I say as I rip the now deceased bird from the cats’ mouth and hide it behind me.

Oh, Ok, Mum.

Billy came to tell me about the new canary he got yesterday, can I go and see it please?

Its very exotic, a rare orange one.

“Of course,” I sigh.

I think of the twisted orange frame of feathers tucked snugly in my hand and I feel dizzy.

END