The Wreckages

Nobody can hear a scream in the vacuum of space, or so they say. What they say is wrong though, they just didn't know what happened to all the people who DO know. Or that there were even people who HAD witnessed all the screams in space, or why we were all there in the first place. I do though, atleast I think I do.

Everything starts somewhere, and from what I can tell this started the 23rd of November, 1963. This is the day good people started doing nothing... not all of them, but it's the day the trickle started. There's a quote by John Stewart Mill (that was falsely attributed to Edmond Burke I think), that said 'the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil, is for good men to do nothing.'. I heard that quote in middle school & it stuck with me in an almost troubling way, and the day this started for me, I knew why.

I was never a Trekky or Star Wars super-fan or anything but I was always in awe of space & all we didn't know about it. There was a movie called 'Interstellar' that I loved with Matthew McConaughey & Jessica Chastain (I just love them) & that one 'Arrival' with Jeremy Renner & Amy Adams (I just love them too). Both of those movies just filled me with wonder & excitement every time I even thought about them. I had so many questions but it wasn't until I got here that I actually started to learn anything about it.

None of us are sure if anyone will ever get back to tell you all, but we are sure of this:

1. Wormholes are real.

2. Wormholes don't just exist in space.

3. Nothing is like we thought it was.

Those are quite broad statements, and might even sound a little scary, but I assure you they are not. The scary things are what is happening where you are right now. This is where the 'good men doing nothing' comes in.

Everything I've told you might seem a bit 'out there' & frankly quite unbelievable up until now, but I promise it gets worse, and I promise you need to listen. Even if you can just humour me for now, I am certain that somewhere in my story something will ring true to you and you'll know what I'm saying is real.

'Ready or not here I come!'. Those are the last words I remember hearing before I ended up here. It was some kids I didn't know playing hide-n-seek, but those are the words I wake up to every morning (I think). What I mean is I think it's morning, it feels like morning used to, but there is no sun or birds, or boyfriend or mom or sisters or cats or my job. All the things I used to have, all the things I miss so dearly. It feels like morning before I remember all those things though. That's why those first few seconds are my favorite, before my heart breaks. I keep hearing it gets better, but so far it has not & I honestly don't think it's possible. That's another story altogether though. Maybe we'll get to it but there are so many we'd need to share. 88,612 from the last count, which could change by a lot in 1 day (what I think is a day) or won't change for a lot (what feels like a week but I'm not sure).

That's my new measurement of time a 'lot', it's kind of a joke because it could mean a long time or might be a second... geez for all I know none of this is even happening or maybe we are a blink in someone's dream. Hard to imagine but not impossible, and... no one really knows. Anyway, ever since I found out that everything I thought I knew about time was wrong, that's what I call it. A 'lot' of time. Not like a large amount, just a piece....like if you cut out chunks of a clear blue sky, you just have no idea how big it is. It's sort of funny, but mostly sad, like english humour (which I also love). Let's get back to it though.

When I arrived I had no idea there were others at first, I thought I was dreaming, but one of those creepy dreams where you can't move very fast or yell, like you're in mud but it's clear. That wears off after some 'time' (I'll call it that because that's what you know it as) and you start to see what else is around. Like being on stage in a play looking out for something familiar, then suddenly everything becomes clear & changes all at the same time. It's like a deja-vu that lasts so long you can't remember which part is real. That's where I am with everything, except my heart definately remembers which is real. I suppose they both are real, unless everything is wrong again. Maybe that sounds strange but it's the best way I can describe it. Honestly it is pretty strange though.

Don't get me wrong, there's plenty to adore down here too. Wait! Why do I always say that?! It could be UP too, but why do I always say down? Ahh, anyway HERE, there's plenty to love also. But what I love the most is everyone's enthusiasm to go back.

From what I know now, I'm not sure they would be so enthusiastic. I say I know, but not from any facts from books or scientists. There's a feeling in my chest so strong it feels like it will pour out of my eyes if I look at someone too long. Then there was the dream which solidified it. I can no longer brush it off or bury it down.