Sweet Doggie

Never in my entire life have I ever thought about doing revenge on someone or anyone for that matter, but there's something I did so terribly awful that I did to a guy I had dated for a while. This is an unbelievable story about the time I got revenge on my ex-boyfriend Mike. Warning: very comedic and vile. Please don’t do it!!!!!

I met my then-boyfriend Mike on Facebook I didn’t know him and he didn’t know me but we had one mutual friend together but I was too afraid to ask my friend Toya about him. Until I asked my friend Toya about him “Oh yeah, Mike, I know him, we used to go to the same middle school plus why did he follow you on Facebook?” "I have no idea.,” I replied. But since I thought Toya said he was a nice guy and a good friend of hers I thought any friend of hers is a friend of mine.

So I started looking at pictures of him on his Facebook profile to see maybe if he looked similar within the area or if he went to the same school as me. I thought wow he is kind of a cutie. His body was built, with sweet rosy cheeks, and has nice, dark curly hair. He messaged me with a waving hand as a way of saying "Hi". I messaged him "Hi". He asked, "Do you go to Clarksburg?" I messaged him, "No." She asked, "Are you from Clarksburg?" I said, "No but live right near Clarksburg. " We started having nice conservation, and then confirm his friend request on Facebook. We would talk every day on Facebook, message me "Good Morning Beautiful" every morning, give him my phone number, and he would text me and call me every evening, blow kisses over the phone every time when we say goodnight. We met at Clarkburg, he passionately kissed me like no guy has ever kissed me before. After we met, we went to his house, downstairs in the basement to his room and we made love it was enjoyable. Everything was going fine between the two of us until he started to fade away barely talking to me, acting shady toward me, and started saying unbelievable things like I'm phony for instance. Then, I saw on his phone he was messaging some girls around the area saying he is single, one of them he calls "wifey". I messaged the "wifey" and she told me she was seeing him at the same time I was seeing him. I even told her that I wasn't the only chick he was seeing. I was so pissed. I was waiting for him to call me for an explanation but nothing so I knew for a fact he was cheating on me with another woman. I had no choice but to let him be and enjoy whoever he was fucking with. I turned on the TV and tune in to the FX channel and The Help was on. It showed the part where Skeeter was talking to Minny and Abileen at her home about getting more maids to spill for her novel until Minny reveal to them about "the terrible awful" she did to Hilly, her ex-boss. Spoiler Alert: Minny made her chocolate pie out of her dookie for Hilly. A very well-deserved dessert for a racist orange-headed bully. I started to laugh it cheered me up. It got me thinking I need to get him to put him in his place for cheating on me. He texted me the next morning asking how am I doing and if I go to the store to get dog food for his dog. The dumbest thing to ask his own "girlfriend" to get him dog food for his dog the least he could do is to tell me the truth and break up with me and call it a night.

I went to Petsmart to find dog food for his dog when I thought about dog food I thought about the time I once taste dog food but then so I was in an aisle where there was wet dog food and I saw this cute little white dog with edible dog food next him on the can and it got me thinking about him. It made me think about feeding two dogs (him and his dog).

I went in my car and texted him that I got the dog food and that I will be by his house. He told me that he left for work in the afternoon. I asked him if he wants me to make him dinner. He said, "Yes". I didn't tell him what I was making him all I said was, "It's a surprise! Just for my baby!"

I arrived at his house with his dog food and found the key under the mat. He texted telling me his mother left for work, and it was just me and his dog in the house. I open the dog food can for his dog to eat and then open another dog food and put it on the pan. I was actually surprised that the food cook right through. I disguised the supposed stew with a mixture of salt and some spices to make it somewhat flavorful so he doesn't know it.

He came home and said hey and nothing else to me. I put his supposed dinner on the table and he looks at it not saying a word and ate it.

"Is it good, baby?" I asked him while he eats his dinner. "Mhmm" he nods. Ha! I couldn't believe he actually likes his so-called meal. Honestly, I didn’t know whether I wanted to laugh or throw up. He sees me and asked, "How come you are not eating?" I said, "I already ate. I just thought why not ."

Yup, I was lying but thankfully he didn't get suspicious. After dinner, I sat down on the couch to watch the basketball game, he sat down after he finished his "dinner". Everything was silent between us until the sound of his stomach started making gurgling weird sounds, then he constantly started and his breath smelled like a dirty dog. He sat next to me and said nothing to me. He tried to wrap his arm around me but my arms were folded and pressed against my chest. I asked him, "Why you didn't answer calls or text messages?" I asked him again and he gives me this dumb deer-in-headlights look like he didn't understand what I was talking about. "I was asleep," he said. "Oh ok." It got awkward and silent over the phone. I was grateful he was still living and breathing but still pissed off with his lies. n"You still there?” he asked. I said, "Yeah, I'm here." He asked if I was coming over to his house. I said, "Yeah, I'll see you later!" Then I hang up. I lied. I actually went to his house, grabbed my stuff from his room, put it in a box, and put the evidence on his bed. He tried calling my phone and texting me but I didn't answer I just pretended I didn't receive any phone calls from him.

That was until the next morning I get a phone call from him screaming "WHAT THE FUCK!!!!"All I could do was laugh it comes to terms that he finally has read the envelope I left him. I said, "I guess you saw the envelope, huh?" He continued cussing at me and I just kept hearing him cussed at me like a petty ass b-word. Then he continued saying, "What the fuck did you have to do that to me? You know you could've killed me! What the fuck were you thinking? "

Then I said, "No, what the fuck were you thinking when you were messing around with another hoodrat behind my motherfucking back with your nasty dirty ass?" He didn't say a word until I told him about the evidence I found him cheating on me. "I mean hey once a dog always a dog." I hang up the phone to clarify that the relationship is over. After I hang up, he blocked me on Facebook so there's that. I never thought about intentionally killing him plus I had to look up on the internet before I cooked it if anyone died from dog food so far as I researched there are none so he's okay for now I wasn't sure if he was allergic to dog food. Just to teach him a lesson men who cheat on me I should've gone the other way and just end our relationship but I wanted vengeance. Oh well! That's what you get but after what happened to Mike I must say I felt sorry for him but not sorry at all. It was a good thing he didn't contact the authorities on me. After all, in the words of Kim Kardashian, "It's what she deserves." I mean "it's what he deserves."

FIN

This story is inspired by a true story but also a work of fiction.

P.S. I was supposed to submit it for challenge but it was too late.