My Sweet Baby

Grab me by the horns,

Let your feet go,

Imagine that were flying,

Within a rainbow.

Stand tall with me,

Press your feet firm into the ground,

Focus in on your desires,

Let the light shoot down your crown.

When the bull starts to rage,

He sees the sight of red,

Passion’s will ignite,

With fear, pain, and dread.

He’s peaceful and he ponders,

He watches and he wanders.

He waits and he listens,

He’s always on a mission.

Xavier, one of my student’s, wrote this poem. He had a dream of a beautiful black shiny bull, running towards him. When the bull approached, he started to rub him. He said the bull gave him a feeling of peace and inspired him to write. Dreams are a reflection of the suppressed emotions we feel. I believe Xavier’s dream was a reminder of his strength. He is the bull. He is black, beautiful and strong. These children come from all walks of life, and I don’t think they realize how special they are. My name is Rebecca Samuels, but the kiddos call me “ReRe”. I teach english and literature. Working for Fennel High School definitely comes with it’s challenges, but I wouldn’t change my job for the world. My soul has truly evolved, since I united with my precious babies. When I met Xavier, he was reading on a first grade level, now he is above his grade level. Although I enjoy him, I initially had trouble understanding how he got to tenth grade. How did so many other teachers overlook his need for help?

Xavier’s story is truly an inspiration. His mother was a prostitute, his father was murdered, and his step-dad was his mothers pimp. Before knowing all of this, I judged him. I felt like he was not applying himself. It weighs heavy on me, but I had those thoughts before knowing the situation. The day I found out about the dynamic of Xavier’s household, I sobbed.

It had been two weeks since Xavier was in class. I started to worry, and took it upon myself to do a home visit. When he opened the door, I was speechless. His eyes were swollen, and he had cuts all over his face. I just stood there and looked him in the eyes, but could not speak. He whispered, “do you want to come in? You have to be quiet my mama’s sleep.” I tiptoed through the door, and saw his mom laying there passed out. I could tell she’d been taking heroin. Her arm was still knotted and her syringe laid right by her. Turns out Xavier’s step dad beat him up for defending his mother. They were having an altercation and Xavier stepped in and jumped on his back.

Xavier begged me to keep the things I saw to myself. As an educator and mentor, I could not make that promise. He was scared, and didn’t want to leave his mom. A child’s love is unconditional. No matter how messed up our parents are, we can’t help but to love them. I asked him to just stay with me and my husband until we figured things out. I felt that if he stayed there, his stepfather would kill him. I went to the police station and explained the situation. They agreed to place his mom in rehabilitation. When Xavier found out his mom had been placed in rehab, I could see a look of relief on his face.

He ended up staying with me until he graduated. It was so beautiful to watch him rise, like a phoenix. I would do this all over again to see the smile he had, when he walked across the stage. His mom was there looking clean put together. She’d gotten back on her feet and found a new place for them to live, away from her ex. To see how his mother transformed, and how at peace Xavier is now, made my decision to take him in, all worthwhile. Xavier will always be “My Sweet Baby.”