Mortal - Chapter 21

Premise: In this young-adult dystopian novel, people can no longer die. But they still feel pain, and suffer--and it's maddening. Because of the chaos that ensued, the US Government created a program to figure out how to kill people. When Garrett, a teenager, falls into a coma for weeks as a result of an experiment, the Program sets its malicious sights on him.

This is the twenty-first chapter of the novel, Mortal. Click here for the beginning of the story. Or, click here to view all chapters.

There’s a knock on the door. I can tell it’s not meant to be intrusive— knuckles softly quivering the door— but rather simply notifying me that there is a subtle presence outside of the room. It does the trick, jolting me back to my senses. I swallow a deep breath and hesitantly rub off the wet stains on my cheeks.

Shaking my head, I rise to my feet. I can’t do this right now. I cannot breakdown. I won’t. I understand why Lucy likes to forget—life would be so damn easy. Unfortunately for us, it’s so damn hard to forget, and I wonder if Lucy knows this and it’s all just a façade, an act, to soothe the people around her while she, herself, aches.

I reach for my crumpled shirt and pull it over my head. Shifting uneasily, I check myself over in the mirror with wavering eyes, judging if I’m presentable. Maybe Lucy does the same thing every day of her life. Once I’m satisfied, I take a shaky breath and leave the bathroom and walk into the lobby.

Lucy’s in the chair I left her in, her face fallen into her hands. A frown tugs at my lips at the sight, and I can’t help but feel it’s my fault. Edward’s standing over her, his face tense with concern, but his blue eyes are unnaturally soft. He’s about to reach Lucy’s shoulder with an unsure hand, but instead sees me first and pulls away.

“Garrett,” he says, blinking.

Lucy jerks her head up at my name, and she stares at me, mortified.

I try to smile at her, but it’s more of a grimace. I take a seat on the armrest of the leather couch and let out a sigh when both of them are still looking at me curiously. “I just needed to be alone for a while,” I say sheepishly, squirming under their gaze.

Edward nods curtly, “Sure.” He lifts a hand to his neck and roughly loosens his silk tie.

They’re still looking at me as if I might implode at any moment, “I’m okay,” I reassure flatly.

Edward reluctantly glances at his shoes as he stuffs his hands into the pockets of his trousers. Finally, his eyes look up at me through the reddish curls of his hair. “Luce says she told you.” He’s familiar with the situation enough to know he doesn’t have to elaborate.

I nod slightly, looking past him to see Lucy, still wide-eyed and on the verge of tears. A breathy groan escapes me.

“Garrett,” Lucy jumps to her feet and stumbles towards me. She stops when she’s next to Edward, brushing against him. “It’s…” her voice cracks, and she feebly glances to the editor. “It’s not as bad as it sounds…And I know it sounds bad, but it really…Garrett, I swear…I’m—I’m not—“

“I’m not afraid of you,” I say calmly. I’m afraid of myself, I admit wordlessly. I clasp my hands together, pressing my thumbs against my chin. “I’m okay, really. I was just…caught off guard.”

“I think we’ve learned a valuable lesson today, Luce,” Edward smirks, grasping Lucy’s shoulders. “Give a guy a warning before you break it to ‘im that you’re mentally insane.”

It takes Lucy a moment to realize it’s a sincere kidding, and she smiles, brightening her eyes. Edward looks at me before whispering something in her ear, and her eyes widen in embarrassment, her face flushing a bright red, and she quickly jabs an elbow to Edward’s side, pulling away bitterly and muttering under her breath.

Edward merely chuckles, his eyes glinting.

My brow knots in confusion, and I feel a tinge of heat in my own cheeks. “Did I miss something?” I ask.

“Absolutely nothing,” Edward replies innocently, eyebrows raised.

I frown and notice the bitter anger of being lied to again numb before it can escape me. Lucy’s wet eyes bore into me and her lip trembles, and it seems like she wants to say something more to me, but doesn’t.

I jerk my head to the side when my ears ring, and thankfully, it soon fades from my movements. Shakily, I lower myself onto the leathered cushion and tightly grip the fabric of the polo in my hands, trying to anchor myself to something.

Edward stares at my clenched hand as if I am using it to murder his mother. Reluctantly, I loosen my hold and absently brush away the wrinkles. “Uh, Lucy…” I say, clearing my throat, “What you told me, were you…do you think it has something to do with me and Project Eden?”

Lucy twists her lip and shifts her weight on her right leg. Slowly, she hesitates, “I’m not sure. I was thinking that maybe Eden wanted to take a more…extensive method in following their newfound lead…”

“What lead?” I ask, rubbing my forehead wearily.

“Your insanity,” Edward replies simply, but carefully watches my reaction with narrowed eyes.

My stomach drops for miles, and to my resentment, I feel my eyebrow twitch against my will. I can only grunt in response.

Warningly, Lucy gives Edward a cold gaze before fluttering her eyes and turning towards me once more. “Maybe Eden thought that with VitCorp’s experience, they could further manipulate you.”

I clasp my hands together and hang my head, thinking. It makes sense. VitCorp treated the insane, but more importantly, they studied them. VitCorp would know better than anyone, anything, what sent someone off, what sent them spiraling, and what weaknesses that someone had and if they could possibly be weakened more. Maybe if Project Eden knew all the tricks, I’d be dead by now.

“But Garrett, that doesn’t mean that they’re right,” she attempts to assure me. I don’t look at her, but I can just hear her next words dripping with haunted anguish, “Everybody has a breaking point…” And I’m forced to look to the floor because I know just how hard it was for her to say that.

But the Secretary found mine. And way too soon, for my liking. What does that say about me?

Edward coughs into his fist, watching the sickly sheen of sweat percolate on Lucy’s pale skin. She’s got that haunted look in her eye again, and her lip twitches as she hesitates to say something else, and sweet relief fills me when the knowing editor prevents her from continuing.

“Where the hell is Bern?”

Eloquent as always, I want to say, but instead I just smile at him because he’s managed to save all three of us from the festering subject of mentality that none of us want to think about.

His eyes find my gaze, and his brow furrows, confused and feigning disgust. He takes a subtle step backwards. Lucy doesn’t seem to appreciate the obviously intentional, but fitting change in conversation. Her arms are crossed over her tense body, and her expression is still vaguely distant.

“He didn’t say,” she says flatly, “He just…left.”

Edward twists his lip slightly as he pulls out his cell phone, dials a number, and presses it to his ear. The volume on the phone is loud enough for all three of us to hear the whurr of each ring.

“Bastard,” Edward mutters when Bern doesn’t pick up. He doesn’t bother leaving a message, tossing his phone onto the couch in mild frustration.

“Well,” he sighs exasperatedly, pulling off his blazer in the process before he sits down on the coffee table, and it’s the first time today I notice how exhausted he is. “While I’m mildly sober, I wanted to talk about where we…go from here.” He moves a hand down his bristled face, and blinks.

Without thinking, I blurt out, “What can we do?” I slouch in helplessness against the couch cushions. After the Secretary’s visit, any chance of stopping Project Eden and the slight chance of normalcy were gone.

Edward grimaces and leans forward, resting his elbows against his knees. “I’ve spoken with my lawyer. He’s trying to find some form of immunity for you, but…” he shakes his head, “It doesn’t look good.”

“Edward,” Lucy says softly, but her voice doesn’t waver anymore, “We need to go.”

“And where do you expect us to go?” Edward raises his eyebrows at her. “We can’t hide from Arthur Paracot, Lucy.”

“Maybe not,” Lucy huffs out some air, and she looks to me, “But we can stall. Leaving Chicago could give Jim enough time to find a loophole. It could give you enough time to finish your article.”

I cock my head at the thought of Lucy being on a first-name basis with Edward’s lawyer before awaiting the editor’s response. He watches her with narrowed eyes, jaw pulsing, calculating his options. “Right. But this article was a pain in the ass to begin with. And now we have a pretty big hunch that this story goes much further than just Project Eden. We have to consider VitCorp now. And that’s something we know absolutely nothing about.”

Lucy presses her lips into a firm line and drops her hands into her lap. She stares at Edward who’s absently rubbing his eyes, body going slack. It looks like he’s about to tip over when Lucy says, “We could take a different route.”

            Gild lifts his chin slightly, “Wha?”

            “Old-fashioned journalism,” Lucy responds, blinking at his prone form.

“The Gilded Age lies enough, thank you,” Edward replies groggily. His head sags to the side, and I can see his glassy eyes flutter closed.

 Lucy purses her lips, “Mildly sober, huh?” She sighs before taking a seat beside him on the table and squeezing his shoulder, rousing him. “I meant it’s time to investigate. Let’s go find the story, and not just hope it comes hobbling in with a bullet stuck in its side, alright?”

“Pretty damn lucky,” Edward smiles slightly, his unfocused eyes meeting mine.

I frown. I’ve never seen this man so…vulnerable. It’s a strange sight to see, and I begin to wonder how many sleepless, booze-filled nights he has spent coddling this story. My stomach twists at the thought.

Lucy simply shakes her head, pity in her eyes, before she turns to me. “What else did the Secretary say to you when he came?”

“He…” my mouth runs dry as my body tenses. Well, he mentioned my parents. That it was their idea, whatever that meant. But do Edward and Lucy need to know that? I can feel myself shaking my head, not wanting to say another word, but my eyes catch Lucy’s glimmering, expecting gaze. She told me the darkest pieces of her past, for the sake of me. Surely I can do the same? “He talked about my parents. Said it was their idea.”

Lucy’s brow creases, “What idea?”

“I don’t know,” I shrug.

“Then let’s find out.”

I jolt from the voice behind me, and slowly turn my head to see Bern leaning against the wall that cuts off the entrance to the elevator. There’s a strange glint in his dark eyes that I can’t quite place, and a slight smile pinching the side of his lip.

Surprised by both his presence and brevity, all I can manage is, “What?”

“You’re late, Bernard,” Edward chides, glaring half-heartedly.

“And you’re still drunk, Gild,” Bern replies pushing himself off the wall.

Edward raises a hand to him, closing his eyes, “Whatever.”

“As I was saying,” Bern clears his throat, “If we’re going to stand a chance against the Secretary, we’re going to need a weapon. Whether that’s the article or some dirty secret, we need to visit Garrett’s parents.”

Chills climb up skin and linger with a cold sweat. I can hear my heart pounding in my skull, but my ears aren’t ringing. At least they aren’t ringing. I pull my knees up to my chest and squeeze them together with my arms, “No.”

“No?” Bern lifts an eyebrow, “Why not?”

I shake my head quickly, “I just can’t.” I scrunch my eyes shut when the pounding rush increases in my skull.

“Garrett, listen,” Bern walks over to me and rests a hand on top of my knee and smiles with pity. “I know seeing your parents after so long, and in their… current mental state will be hard on you.”

“You don’t know the half of it,” I mutter, feigning an itch in my eye, so that I could rub away the formulating tears with a shaky fist.

Bern nods curtly and decides to kneel in front of me. “But I know, and I think you know too, that it’s necessary. I don’t want to have to visit the mental hospital anymore than you do.” He looks away and glowers at the carpeted rug. “But it must be done.”

“You don’t understand,” I say feebly, jerking off the hand on my knee. My parents tried to kill me. My own mother pulled a knife on me and wanted to slit my throat. They abandoned me to Project Eden.

“Garrett,” Bern sighs, shaking his head. I stare at the creasing on his forehead. The creases caused by exasperation. I’m annoying him. “I realize that, yes, our situations may be slightly different, but as a doctor, having to witness—“

“You don’t understand,” I snap, jumping to my feet.

Bern grips my wrist before I can take another step, and pulls himself onto his feet. “Try me.”

The muscles of my arm tense under his grasp, and I feel my face hot and clammy as I glare at the stiff hand, willing it to release me before I lose myself. I will not break. I won’t. Not in front of them.

“Let go,” I barely whisper.

“This isn’t about you,” Bern tells me, warm breath brushing against the side of my face. I force myself not to flinch. “You said so yourself. People are suffering. Help them.”

I screw my eyes shut, before finally gazing up at him. I swallow hard against the swelling fear, tickling my throat. He’s right. I escaped the Project, so that I could stop this. Abel and Therese risked themselves in order to give me a chance to do something.

Edward’s on his feet now, looking mostly alert which is somewhat surprising considering his earlier state. “Tsk tsk, Doctor.” Edward says, shaking his head slightly. His cold fingers touch my arm as he begins to pry Bern’s grip off my wrist. Bern’s temple pulses in frustration, but he releases me without protest, and I quickly pull my arm to my side. “Naughty,” Edward looks up at Bern, squinting.

Bern rolls his eyes, and shifts his posture, crossing his arms. “We can’t just sit here. We need to figure out what Eden and VitCorp are planning. We can’t just sit here when hundreds of people are begging for death!”

A twinge of guilt hits me and I frown, stepping away from the two older men.

Edward doesn’t raise his voice to match the doctor’s. “That’s a little…hypocritical, Doctor, wouldn’t you say?” He smiles at the man.

What the hell is he doing.

Bern’s face darkens. “You know bloody well this is different,” he manages to grit out. I sit next to Lucy, and her head turns to me slightly, but her eyes remain fixated on the side of Edward’s face.

“Oh, I realize,” Edward says softly, lifting his eyebrows, “I realize. But what do you expect us to do?”

Bern realizes Edward is trying to get something from him. His face flashes with irritation before hardening into polished composure. “Anything. We’re running out of time, and you’re too much of a drunkard to finish the god damn article.”

Edward smiles crookedly, revealing white teeth, “It’s only seasonal, I assure you.”

Bern snorts in disbelief, “Garrett’s parents are the only link we have to the Secretary right now. It’s at least worth investigating.”

I flinch, and this time, Lucy’s gaze bores into me with something like concern. I know it’s not pity. Both of us know too much about each other to ever give pity. I nod curtly, signaling that I’m fine, but I’m not. Why can’t I have one piece of my past locked away?

“And you don’t think it’s a trap,” Edward says flatly, watching the man carefully.

“I didn’t say that,” Bern says, lifting his hands in concession, “But the only way to find answers to anything, is to go deeper. Even if it is a trap, we’ll be able to find out more about the Secretary’s motives. And we’ll be prepared.”

Edward shrugs, “Reasonable enough.”

“You don’t have to visit my parents,” I say, finally. All three of them are looking at me now. “I gave you everything on Project Eden. You don’t have to involve my parents.”

Edward looks slightly uncomfortable maneuvering his hands into his narrow pockets. Lucy stares, but it’s Bern who speaks, “Garrett. You heard him. He didn’t care that you told Gild. We need to raise the stakes. He has all the cards, and if this thing about your parents isn’t a trap, if it helps leads us to a secret that he’s more careful about keeping, we could use that.”

My parents. My attempted murderers. Mentally insane. And…involved with Project Eden and VitCorp. Could this possibly be any more confusing? I rise from the table with the thought of fleeing blaring in my head.

“Garrett?”

Edward’s grimacing unevenly, but his voice is almost innocent.

“Yeah?”

“Um…I’m about to puke my guts out, so…try to not barricade yourself in the bathroom again, alright?”

I can tell his request has nothing to do with the alcohol in his empty stomach. “Yeah,” I murmur before lowering myself back onto the table, rubbing my hands down my face in hopes that my fingers will jostle me back to reality as well as hide the surely flushing skin.

“Does Garrett even have to go?” Lucy asks, resting a hand on my knee. I’m not sure if she puts it there to comfort me or restrain me from trying to leave again.

Bern looks at her pointedly, “What?”

“Well,” she sighs, “It’s obvious that there’s no way to convince you otherwise from making this trip. I think we’re all curious about what we could possibly find. But…” Lucy glances at me before averting my eyes, “Isn’t it safer if he stays away from that?”

“How is that safer? The Secretary already knows he’s here, and he has no means of getting anywhere else,” Bern responds bluntly.

“What if I stay with him?” Lucy asks, ignoring Bern’s condescension.

“Then you’re really screwed,” Edward says.

Lucy jerks her head towards him and glowers, “What the hell does that mean?”

Edward only smiles mischievously, his blue eyes bright.

“He’s right,” Bern agrees, nodding, “You’d stand no chance if they came. And you’d only draw attention to both of you.”

“How so?” Lucy demands defensively.

“Hmm, let’s see,” Edward strokes his chin with his thumb, “Could it possibly be that every time you open your mouth, you sound like a fog horn? No…Wait…that certainly couldn’t be it.”

“I really hate you when you’re drunk,” Lucy snarls.

“Let’s be honest, you really—“

“Jesus Christ,” Bern mutters, “Lucy, you’d draw attention because you would have to keep going up here. You’re a photography intern, there would be no reason for you to be up here if Edward isn’t in.”

Lucy’s shoulders slouch in defeat and she looks at me with soft, weary eyes that could only mean to say, I’m sorry.

I stare down at my hands, smoothing out the fabric of my pants. They’re trembling, but barely, so that I’m sure I am the only one who can see. I never thought I would see them again. Not once. Even if I was released from Eden which was a rare fantasy of mine when I was younger, I wouldn’t want to. Because they weren’t really my parents, not anymore. New, frantic, delirious life was created when their minds snapped. This life is foreign, but the shell of the former still remains as a haunting memento. No wonder our world is overpopulated.

“So it’s settled,” Bern says, clearing his throat. “We’ll leave tomorrow morning.”

 Thanks for reading everyone! See you next week with more chapters! xoxo, Liv