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Just Being Frank

a dialogue only story

By M. LeePublished 3 months ago Updated 2 months ago 2 min read





“God, he must think that I like the sound of my voice or somethin’—Come ovah heah. Did you see my brain?”


“My brain! My brain! Did you see it? I need to find it befoah the rest of the monstuhs get heah foah the shuffleboard party.”


“I SAID—oh nevahmind. I shoulda known those doctors would use such shotty construction on me— these dang bolts nevuh seem to stay in place and…Well finally, it’s about time you geot here. Do you know how long I called you? Do you have any idea as to how long you kept me waiting?”

“Hmmm—mmmm— mmmm—mmmm.”

“What’s a matter with youse anyway? Cat got your tongue? Oh don’t tell me yoah tongue fell out.”


“Then what’s going on with you? First you can’t heah, now ya can’t speak? What’s next?”


“Oh quit your groaning Frankie and have a look.”


“I SAID HAVE A LOOK— well look at that! It’s no wonder ya can’t heah me ya big lug-- you’re missing your ears. Let me help you find them. Here’s one and oh! Here’s the other and uh-oh, oops—sorry I dropped it—and here we go right over there. Perfect. Now can you heah me?”


“Good. I need you to find my brain befoah the othuh monsters get heah—we’re expecting the Dracula’s, the creature from the Blue Lagoon— even the Blob is coming and I really need my brain! I’d hate to look like an idiot; so tell me, you didn’t happen to see it did you?"

“Buuuuurp-- smack-smack.”

“No you didn’t. Tell me you didn’t just eat my—“

“Yup. Mmmmhmmm.”

“And how did it taste?”

“Mmmm mmmm good.”

“WHY do you do this to me? Seventy years we’ve been togethuh and now— now you’ve finally done it. I can’t believe you ate my—“

“Oh sorry. I should have asked. Did you want some?”

“No I didn’t want some! How could you?”

“It was just sitting there in the living room looking at me.”

“And you don’t feel bad?”


“How could you not feel bad?”

“It was just something to tide me over I guess. Wait—where are ya going?”

“To my mothuhs.”



“Because what? Because I ate a little treat before the guys came over? Big deal!”

“Big deal? YOU ATE MY BRAIN!”

“I huh— what? Oh! Hahahahahahahahaha*snort* You mean you think I ate your— you gotta be kidding me! Your brain? Be serious! For your information your brain is right where you left it-- ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.”

“Huh? Oh Frankie! I’m sorry I evuh accused you of eating my brain. I should know by now what a sweet lovable man you are.”

“Mmmm hmmmm.”

“I’m sorry Frankie. I’ll go put it in right now.”

“Mmmmmm. I can’t believe she would THINK to accuse me of eating her brain! That woman is out of her mind! A brain-- that’s disgusting-- despicable even. But that toe… mmmmmmmmm.

* * *

© M. Lee / All Rights Reserved.

HumorShort StoryMicrofiction

About the Creator

M. Lee

BA English. MFA bound. INFP. Published author, poet, lyricist. Dreamer, creator, artist, teller of tales, lover of words, singer of songs, reveler of life.

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All my work is authentically created by me— NO ai

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©M. Lee

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Comments (2)

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  • Mackenzie Davis3 months ago

    OMG that ending! You nailed the accent, I was cracking up, reading this. This is fantastic!!

  • Test3 months ago

    Fantastic writing. Such a captivating story.

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