I'm not afraid to be such a "tough" girl

It's not that I don't want to be spoiled, it's that I'm afraid of disappointment.

It's not that I don't want to act cute, it's that I don't have a partner.

In February 2014, I went to Anhui by car with my suitcase to record "Super Speaker". Sitting on the high-speed train, I was happy and excited. In this journey, I do not have to bear the passers-by, relaxed onlookers, full of expectations of foreigners, as long as the serious experience of adventure and surprise is good, after the end of the school to live a "human model" serious life.

At that time, I must have never imagined the embarrassment and confusion that would later occur.

After arriving in Anhui, I was put in a hotel for three days before it was my turn to record. There were more than 60 contestants in the first round of taping, and the daily process began at mid-afternoon and continued until 11 p.m., sometimes later, and the next day's contestants had to wait until the stage was cleared to come up for rehearsal.

The process of waiting is only unbearable lonely anxiety, always feel very hungry, but no appetite. Three nights I almost in insomnia, I do not know why nervous, but the heart will suddenly accelerate, palms sweat, and I am very disgusted with myself.

It's like I've never had such a big occasion in my life. I'd be possessed if I wasn't nervous about the cameras, the lights, the live audience of 300 people and the four mentors I could only see on television.

It's like I've spent all my nervous energy in the first round of Super Speaker.

Nervousness is not the hardest part.

It was unbearable that when I had finished introducing myself, I tried to relieve the stage depression by referring to a text message I had received from a friend on the way here in the morning.

A friend said: if you are nervous, treat the audience as a radish tree.

Combined with the current nervous mood I said: after all, I can not treat the audience as a turnip, no turnip will move.

The instructor immediately answered, "Do you mean you don't want the audience to interact with you?"

If the previous anxiety has drawn all my thoughts into a thin tight string, then at this moment, the string has finally broken, my thoughts are not connected up and down, the formation of all chaos, how should I answer? In fact, it was just a casual joke, after all, the content of the following speech is funny, experience has taught me that a person who is uncomfortable, a person who is in tension can never be funny, I just want to relax.