Heartless No More

My Dear Reader,

First I must apologize for the sloppy penmanship, unfortunately I am not left-handed.

But I digress…

We’ve all heard the saying “wearing your heart on your sleeve”. Well, now that saying is far more literal than figurative. You see, as technology began to encompass more and more of our daily routines we, humans that is, began to feel less and less. Becoming more like the programmed algorithms we had become oh so reliant on to handle even the most menial of tasks, such as finding a connection. Due to our reliance of programs such as social media, dating websites, virtual reality and anything else that could create even the slightest semblance of emotional connection, every human being has slowly lost their innate ability to foster an emotional connection with… well anything.

The ramifications were subtle at first; low customer satisfaction in businesses, gardens beginning to dry up and wither away, that sort of thing. Eventually, however, this progressed to staggeringly high death rates of animals no longer being cared for, patients in hospitals not receiving the care they need to survive injuries and illnesses, our ecosystem being completely jeopardized for continued expansion, and basic human connection coming to complete halt. This even began to impact successful births, and those children who survived did not have the slightest idea of what a mother’s love meant, going about their days just as robotic and lifeless as the machines that began to overrun the dying Earth.

Now there were a few scientists who began to see the downward trend in the viability of the planet to continue to sustain life; and thus, in an effort to reverse this travesty, developed an arm band with a simple heart shaped locket which would glow an array of varying colors to cue its wearer of the appropriate emotion to express in any given situation.

Great idea, right? It would have been; if humanity, if we can even still be called as such, had not become completely reliant on that piece of hardware just as they had with everything else.

Of course, like with all technology, there were bound to be some bugs, some malfunctioning units that made it through the quality control inspections. This often results in some humans losing or abandoning their lockets, as it was only logical to cease the utilization of something that proved to be obsolete or defective. Hell, it’s the reason why we stopped caring for our gardens and pets; why put so much effort into something that could provide no real monetary gain and could easily malfunction due to the slightest change in a routine. Anyway, these humans became known as The Heartless. Completely devoid of any tool to portray emotions and often unable to act correctly in proper society.

Allow me to officially introduce myself to you, dear reader: my name is Cordis, and I, myself, am one of The Heartless. My locket malfunctioned 2 years 356 days 14 hours and 27 minutes ago. Since then, I’ve had nothing that could help guide me in understanding social situations or the most basic of human emotions. This led me to the decision to sequester myself into my flat where I can be in seclusion with nothing more than my thoughts, never again being a burden to others.

Recently, however, I began to have these thoughts… these feelings of wanting to be surrounded by others, to create human connection. This turned into a personal hypothesis, what if a Heartless could adapt and relearn their emotions in an effort for self-preservation. I’ve begun to conduct research on several scientific studies that postulate that different species of animals would adapt to their surrounding environments, simply for the sake of survival. The process would take several generations of trial and error, many of these generations being wiped out due to an error in their adaptation, but over time a new version of the parent species would result, being able to not only survive, but thrive in a harsher environment.

On that day, I found myself in the harshest of all environments, one that I fear will swallow all of who I am and all of humanity: loneliness. The only escape from this environment is to adapt just as so many generations of creatures have done in the past for the sake of survival.

That very first step out of my self-imposed prison and into the steel jungle that was once known as Colorado, felt as though I had made the journey up the highest peak of the Rocky Mountains. My chest was tight, my breath was shallow, and I was sweating profusely. All of these physical reactions to a single step outside of my flat and into a world I had not been a part of for nearly 3 years.

I recall the steam that rose throughout the entirety of the city, carrying with it the pungent odor of smog and filth enveloping my very being, eliciting a reflex that I had not had to suffer through for nearly 3 years. The blinding neon lights serving as abrasive advertisements for another technological marvel. What I don’t recall is the sight of the sky; no stars, no clouds, no birds.

Progressing through the ever-shrinking halls that made the inner streets of the city I resided in, all that plagues my mind in those moments were the stares. The looks of discomfort and judgment from other humans who took one look at my wrist and “knew” me. No matter who I approached I would receive the same response; a dull flash of purple light from the wrist, a troubled mask of an expression, and some weak-willed excuse as to why I could not bother them presently. The entire situation brought another tightness to my chest, one far different than what I had experienced leaving my flat, one that came paired with clenching of fists and gritting of teeth. I did not like this feeling.

I knew, then, that I was unwelcome, still, in civilized society and would need to venture deeper into the darker recesses of the city if I were to find someone willing to converse with me, and perhaps even connect with.

During my solitude I must have forgotten the sheer enormity of the city. Everywhere I looked were steel pillars looming over the denizens, hulking automatons whirring and scanning passersby. I am almost certain I saw at one point a fellow Heartless, an elderly gentleman by the looks of it, being taken away by one of these sentries. I’m not certain what exactly happened, but the sentry returned only moments later without the older gentleman accompanying it.

No matter. I had to continue moving forward if I were to unlock the secret to human emotion, to breathe life once again into the husks now wandering these streets.

My journey led me into the very bowels of our once great city, a place where the source of the putrid scents were all too visible. It was here amongst the filth and waste of the rest of the world that I found what can only be described as the salvation of humanity. Though by found, I feel that it is pertinent to clarify that finding was more an effort of hearing rather than sight.

Laughter. The laughter of children. The sound beckoned me forward as if it were a siren’s call. I had never heard something so pure, something that caused an aching pain along my cheeks as my lips contorted into the unnatural shape that I now understand to be a smile.

As I rounded the corner to get my first true glimpse of happiness, the laughter was abruptly snuffed out and replaced with hushed tones of what I could only assume to be fear. Who were they so frightened of that their joy could come to such an unceremonious end, I wondered?

However, this was not the right question. It would have been better to ask, “What?” It was at this moment that I caught sight of the alabaster plating of a sentry seemingly also drawn by the laughter, though with far more malicious intent.

Looking around the corner I could see several children, some adolescents, and even a couple of adults. Each without their locket yet each so full of Heart! Was the sentry truly about to exterminate such a wonderous sight? Humans had already begun to recapture their emotions! Not only that, but I could see how the adults were gripping the younger children and even telling blatant lies of how everything would be alright; this was a family!

A true family who were so connected to one another, no calculations as to who should be allowed to live or die, no allowing the weakest to perish so the strong may continue to survive. They were together. Live or die, they were together.

This is also the moment I caught a glimpse of you, my dear reader. So afraid of your demise, though through your adolescent tears shined another emotion; no, not an emotion, but a declaration that you would not die this day. I recall this quite clearly, as this moved me to do something very illogical.

I leapt in front of the sentry. I leapt in front of the towering automaton, and I laughed! Why did I laugh? Oh, but that laughter was the most addictive substance I had ever relished in. I laughed as the machine grasped my outstretched arm. I laughed as I sailed through the air. I laughed as I slumped on the floor, feeling my life slip away from me. I continued to laugh as I scrawled this message out for you, dear reader.

Of all the emotions I could have felt at this very moment, I never believed I would have felt peace. However, it was at this moment, as impossible as it may seem, I could have sworn I saw a single Blue Jay fly across my vision, just as free as the laughter had made me feel. Just as free as humanity should be.

Now dear reader, if you recall from earlier in this passage, I mentioned that certain species of animals would slowly adapt from generation to generation to survive in their environment. Unfortunately, my generation is one that will face extinction as we were unable to properly evolve, but I see that you have adapted, and you are thriving.

Never let go of your family. Never let go of that connection.

You are not Heartless.

You are not Alone.

You are the Future.