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Why Do I Smile?

A True Multi-Generational Tale

By Charles MacGregorPublished 3 years ago 5 min read
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I have lost count of the sheer number of times others have commented on my positive nature and the sheer fact that I am always smiling. It has always seemed just so perplexing to others for someone to be so happy all of the time. I've even had old colleagues and friends make comments such as, "I've never seen you angry" or "Why in the world are you so happy right now".

I could always sense a level of frustration from some people, while from others the feeling was more of a jealous note almost. Either way I've always maintained the same statement for near two decades, "I never forget to smile."

Seems simple enough, right? Well it hasn't always been so simple. In fact, those who know me best understand that behind the smile is a man with depression and anxiety. A man who has lost a lot, given a lot, and asks for nothing. So why do I keep smiling. I can bet some readers are currently thinking that I'm putting on a mask to hide my pain, maybe I'm trying to be strong for my family, or maybe I'm just completely ignorant.

It's not quite so simple. My reason for always smiling, no matter the trials I face stems from one individual, my grandfather, Retired Col. Charles MacGregor of the US Air Force.

I was always told about how positive of a force he was and how compassionately he acted towards others. I heard stories of his bravery, the deeds he accomplished, and the legacy he left behind.

Unfortunately, I never got the opportunity to meet this man. You see, my grandfather was diagnosed with a severe form of Alzheimer's Disease back when I was only 6. So the man I grew up getting to know was a shell of the man he once was, but he was always smiling. I never understood why someone in his position would smile when he was literally losing all that made him who he was. My grandmother once told me his motto in life was to always smile through all adversity and somehow that piece just stuck no matter how far gone he was.

As I got older I tried my best to create a relationship with my grandfather, to never take it personally when he asked me who I was, or called me by my cousin's name. My entire family ended up moving to Florida to help support him and my grandmother during his final years. A task that I would never wish on another 11 year old boy. I was asked to assist with changing my grandfather into new clothes, to help feed him, and to watch over him from time to time.

There was very little left of my grandfather as he neared the end. He had entered a completely vegetative state and could not respond to conversation or even make genuine eye contact. He would simply lie in bed staring out the window.

It was the Sunday before he passed, however, that one of the most miraculous events that have ever occurred to be came to be. My father, uncle, and myself were sitting around my grandfather, making idle conversation, or rather they were and I was a bored pre-teen staring at a blank TV screen.

It was then that we all noticed movement from my grandfather; he was pulling himself to sit up straight and looking around at his two dumbfounded sons, and equally bewildered grandson. He smacked his lips and stated quite coherently, "Could someone grab me a beer?" Four months the man hadn't been able to speak or move, four months! And the first thing he requested was a beer!

Of course my father and uncle quickly obliged and grabbed 3 beers and an IBC Root Beer for the underaged individual in the house. For the next hour we spoke to my grandfather, we actually spoke to him and we all laughed together. But, we could see him beginning to slow down again and it was at this point my grandfather looked at me and said with his characteristic smile, "Charles, I'm going to go away again soon. So let me tell you something my grandfather told me. The reason why I always smile. There is enough pain and hardship in the world that there really is no reason to frown. I smile, not out of ignorance to what is out there, but to spite all the pain and sadness. To show the world that I'm still smiling and there's nothing it can do to take that away from me. I smile to remind myself that I am strong. I smile to remind others how easy it is to smile. I smile, to never forget the joy I have felt throughout my life. So, Charles, never forget to smile."

Within minutes after saying all of this he had slipped back into a vegetative state with one distinct difference, he had quite the grin. I still have no idea what had happened with him in those moments, or what jolted him into asking for that beer. Whatever it was, it led to me learning one of the most important life lessons I have ever taken away.

The very next day I was pulled from school to learn that he had passed away. My grandfather had finally found peace. As the next few days went on and we said our final goodbyes, shared stories, attended his service, I did all of it smiling through the painful tears. I said to everyone who attended his funeral and asked me why I was smiling and crying, "I'm smiling for Pop, but I'm crying because I miss him."

Now, at 29 years old, I continue to smile every single day. No matter the pain I experience, I always find one reason to smile on each day. I smile for myself.

So just like my grandfather once said to me, I now pass along to you all. I have one simple thing to say to each of you:

Never forget to smile.

happiness
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About the Creator

Charles MacGregor

Full time elementary school counselor in the beautiful state of Colorado! I have always been an avid reader and have had dreams of writing for as long as I can remember! I hope you enjoys my work!

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