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Erasure

Tuesday 4th June, Story #156/366

By L.C. SchäferPublished 9 days ago Updated 8 days ago 3 min read
10
Image created with AI

This will be my last entry, I'm sure of it. I can barely feel the keys under my fingertips.

If I look this way, my fingers look solid enough and the keys look ghostly, like they aren't fully of this dimension. Or they are hardly real at all.

If I look this way, the keys look normal and it's me that looks translucent and hardly-there.

It's the latter that's true. I'm certain of it.

It started with Facebook. Those little blue thumbs. Then Insta, and the hearts. Then tiktok, and twitter, and threads and and and...

I'd post a picture where I looked good, or thin, or sexy, or.... And wait for those responses, emojis, comments.. I'd say what I think or how I felt, leaning heavily on the affirmation. I felt seen. I felt real.

You can't go sexy too often, though. There's a limit, and then people turn away. A hospital shot, or alluding to some other crisis works as long as it's only occasionally. Cute pets is a good staple.

Little did I know that this would become an addiction, and I'd need a greater hit to feel the same effect. Or that, over time, I'd need a pretty big hit even to reach '"normal". That the come-down was leaving me feeling less connected and less seen than ever, and I was spending longer down there in that trough.

I know now: this is a feature, not a bug, of all those sites and apps I was using.

My friends, if they are friends, haven't said anything. Out of politeness, probably. But they don't see me. Can't see me. When we are out together, you know, in person, I feel invisible. Their eyes skitter over me, see through me, or avoid me completely. There's a reason for that.

Deep in the pit of addiction now, when those likes fall short. Because I posted less often, or my thoughts clash with the hive mind. When the algorithm squeezes me... I'm not seen. Not real. I fade.

I don't just want views and engagement. I need them. Really need them.

I need you to see me. Please. Otherwise this will be my final entry. Even now, my fingers are passing through the keys half the time.

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Word count, excluding note: 366

Submitted on 4th June at 22.30

*Quick Author's Note*

First, and most importantly:
thank you so much for reading my story! The ha'penny that Vocal will toss in my hat for your eyeballs landing on this humble piece will be well-spent. I might cryogenically freeze myself before I'm completely clapped out.

If you enjoyed this one, the very best compliment you can give me is to share it, or read another!

I've written about being invisible before, and I've also written about being perpetually Connected. Here they are:



A Year of Stories: I'm writing a story every day this year. This one continues my 156 day streak since 1st January.


Please do consider lending your support to the other creators who are also on this madcap "a story every day" adventure. They are putting out excellent content every day!


Rachel Deeming


Gerard DiLeo


The story behind the story: This one is pretty self explanatory, I think.

Marty McFly in Back to the Future

Leave me a comment: it makes it easier for me to reciprocate the read. I know I am behind on reads, but doing my best to catch up.

Thank you

Thank you again, most sincerely. Especially if you are one of the wonderful people who has been staunchly reading these daily scribbles since the start of the year. I see you, and appreciate you very much indeed!
😁

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Short StoryMicrofiction
10

About the Creator

L.C. Schäfer

Book-baby is available on Kindle Unlimited

Flexing the writing muscle

Never so naked as I am on a page. Subscribe for nudes.

Here be micros

Twitter, Insta Facey

Sometimes writes under S.E.Holz

"I've read books. Well. Chewed books."

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Comments (9)

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  • Dharrsheena Raja Segarran8 days ago

    Gosh that validation was so relatable. Loved this story!

  • Andrea Corwin 8 days ago

    Your last entry....perhaps WE are the addicted! Well done!

  • Caroline Craven8 days ago

    Can’t believe we’re into June and you’ve posted a story every day. That’s AWESOME! Not only that - your stories are just getting better and better. Wishing you all the best L.C. You’re smashing this.

  • Anu Mehjabin8 days ago

    Keep going, you're doing great!

  • Congrats on your last entry 😂. Let me be addicted.

  • The Addiction is real haha, though I often wonder if you just post yourself, plain, simple, or ridiculous as you might be, if you can circumvent the negatives. I'm in a testing phase right now as Social Media has never really been "my thing".

  • Cathy holmes9 days ago

    The perils of SM. I can be an addiction. This is really well done.

  • I know what you mean. My fear is losing my relevance. Funny, when I stop caring about being relevant and just enjoy what I do, that is when people chime in.

  • Gerard DiLeo9 days ago

    I feel the fade. Yes… I can feel it… Daisyyyy, Daisyyyyyyyyyy…

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