Desperation

Folding up my cardboard sign, I carefully slide it into my worn backpack between the blanket and empty water bottles. Seeing the rain clouds making their way towards the city, I tighten my grip on Pip’s leash to jog back to our usual alleyway dumpster. Once there, I flip the lids back and duck underneath our makeshift shelter. Hope fills me as I place the empty water bottles out to collect the rain. With nothing left to do but relax, Pip curls up in my lap knowing it’s time to sleep. I watch his protruding ribs rise and fall and know I need to get us some food soon.

Early the next morning, we find the water bottles full to the brim. Pip refuses the water so I drink a considerable pull from one and then pack them away. We start our day at our first corner hoping for some mercy. The morning slips by without so much as a glance in our direction. We move to another corner down the street and as we walk, I feel my stomach cramp up but I carry on. Luck finally graces us in the form of a young woman. She hands me some cash and pats Pip’s head before heading off. Seeing the twenty-dollar bill in my hand is all the motivation I need to go find food. As we walk down the street, I get wobbly in my knees and then feel myself fall forward smacking my face. Everything goes black.

I wake up to the memory of what a bed feels like and bright white lights. Blinking, a nurse appears in my vision.

“Well, someone is finally awake,” she grins at me.

“Where am I? Where’s Pip?”

“I’m not sure who Pip is… but you were brought into the hospital by a gentleman who found you passed out on the sidewalk. We ran some tests and unfortunately figured out that you contracted cholera. You’re very sick and we need to rehydrate you.” She speaks in a solemn tone. I sit up and instantly regret it as cramps punch my gut.

“Pip is my dog. He’s out there and probably looking for me. He needs food.” I explain as tears prick my eyes.

She looks at me and not without compassion states, “If you leave this hospital, Pip won’t have anyone to take care of him because you will die of dehydration in less than twenty-four hours.” Reality hits me over the head at the horror of the choice I have to make. I can either leave now, find food and Pip, and hope to get better on my own or stay and get better but risk Pip being alone for a few more hours… It’s a terrible feeling but the nurse is right. I lay back down and let the tears flow freely now.

Hours later, I’m cleared and feeling better with a meal to-go from the kind nurse. Taking off down the street towards our alleyway, I send up a few prays that Pip is waiting for me there.