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Born from light

Chapter 3 scholarly eye

By JonationPublished about a month ago 3 min read
2

Walking down these halls always has a way of making one feel welcome from the sea blue walls to the hardwood floor, the candles giving some light to guide me to class on such a dim day. Turning the corner into class I see everyone seated and chatting amongst themselves before class starts. The class room is a is decorated with drawings and paintings of historic figures from Bruno Angobar the founder of the empire in the year 2138 to Dona Sanchez the woman who brokered peace between us and the mutants from the irradiated lands in the north in the year 2210. I’ve always loved history even back in my old life, I use to go through the empirical library and just read for hours about the past. The teacher hasn’t made it in yet her desk has a bowl full of candy and her desk is covered in various papers scattered about with markers and pens. The candles are higher in the wall making the shadows in the corners dance. The rain is pouring heavily outside and I can hear the then thunder out in the distance. I take a seat at my desk and prepare for the days lesson.

“Hey Palo” I hear a familiar voice laugh from behind me and I feel something light hit the back of my head. I look down and I see it’s a rolled up piece of paper, as in looking at the paper another one is thrown. I see Palo’s friend Juan smiling and scrunching up another piece of paper from his binder. Juan is a portly child even though he would never admit it, he calls himself big boned. He has short black hair and very wide dark eyes and a very mischievous smile. “What you doing for your birthday?” He says while reading up to throw another. “I don’t know yet but mom made chocolate pancakes so I’m happy, you want to go to the park after school?” Juan thinks for a second “Naw i have a much better idea meet me at the water well after school, I have something awesome to show you”

As he says that Mrs, Songo steps into the class room, her orange and red dress though dulled in color made her stand out. Her hair long and tied up into a bun exposing soft brown eyes. “Good morning class I trust you are all rested and prepared for todays history lesson.” Everyone in says “Good morning Mrs. Songo” everyone rises from their seats and raised their right fist to their chests and a salute with their left hand. Mrs Songo does the same and begins the daily vows with the class as she says it we repeat after her “ I vow as a citizen of the empire to uphold the Justice and law of the emperor , I vow to protect and aid my fellow citizen. I Vow loyalty and service to the emperor, I vow that if war were to come to the empire to fight too the bitter end.” She lowers her hands and we all do the same “you may be seated and be ready for our lesson” I pull out my pencil and paper.

Mrs. Songo pulls out her papers and pulls out a candle and candle holder, she uses a match to light it. “ Before we start the lesson Today is Palo’s birthday so after class you all may take some Candy from the bowl on my desk.” Everyone sounds excited hearing this they all say “ happy birthday Palo”. The child part of me feels anxious and scared facing ask the children look at him. “Ttt thank yy you everyone” My palms feel so moist with sweat, I can hear my heart beating in my ears beating faster and faster until Mrs. Songo Chimes in “ so for todays lesson today we shall discuss the founding of the empire.

Fantasy
2

About the Creator

Jonation

Reader insights

Nice work

Very well written. Keep up the good work!

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  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  1. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (1)

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  • Tomos Jacksonabout a month ago

    I do like this one. There are still a few places (based on how I am reading it) where punctuation still needs so work. The characters act like you would expect them to and their dialogue flows naturally. We're starting to get some insights into the day to day life of Palo/Alo. I think what you could have done is lean a little more into the relationship with Juan or Mrs Songo, or perhaps the history lesson itself (its the perfect setting for developing culture and backstory without exposition feeling out of place) because remember that a story doesn't tend to follow every part of a characters life, but the relevant highlights. I think leaning into either a personal relationship that will be relevant to Alo later, or maybe a bit of background for the world via the lesson would give the overall purpose of the story more punch. But again, the style is improving leaps and bounds, its much easier to read and the dialogue is doing very well now. Keep it up, and I look forward to more ;)

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