Away I Go

I was with my lover, and I thought nothing could ever change. But I was wrong, I had to be let go from Earth because of an illness I had. I never imagined it would end this badly, without him life seems dull. Here I am, next to him but he no longer sees me. He seems disoriented. That spark that lightened up his brown eyes was no longer there. As he lay down crying on my side of the bed, I sat next to him and rubbed my hands against his hair. I wish I could have talked to him more before I left, my last word to him was Desert. That’s it nothing else. I couldn’t finish what I wanted to tell him. I wanted to tell him that I wanted to go to the desert one last time, just us.

It’s been days and he hasn’t left the house, and it saddens me to see someone I love become so hurt that he can’t do anything. I tried to tell him I was there, but I couldn’t. These past few days nothing seemed to work but I decided to try one last time today. Just my luck, I was able to play a song that kept repeating the word Desert. That was when I slightly saw that spark in my lover’s eyes again. He shot up from bed and made his way to the player. He stared at it in awe and called out my name, but I couldn’t answer. He knew I was there. I was with him.

That was when he realized what he had to do. He picked me up and grabbed his keys. He made his way out the door and into his car. At that moment he knew he had to go to the desert no matter how long it took. While on the way to the desert, he would stop by places we once loved, a distant memory. He held me close to his side as he looked over. Maybe he is remembering the times when I was there with him. The love that we once shared had been shattered by my tragedy. At this time, he made it to the desert. I cried because I wished I could tell him that I loved him. I wish I could hold him one last time and tell him that everything will be okay. I will always be with him no matter how far I am away.

As he reached the dessert, he got out of the car and then proceeded to pick me up. He stared at the road ahead and it looked endless, no cars in sight. He looked over to the sides and all he saw was just emptiness filled with cactus in certain areas. He set out a blanket and set me down with him. He was always gentle with me and even when I am gone, he is still gentle with me. He cried as he was talking to me. “I wish I could see you. I wish you didn’t have to leave. How can I go on with my life without you here? I am a mess and I just want to see you and hug you. I want to tell you how much I love you. I will always love you no matter what happens. You will always be my angel. Please come see me and show me that you are here. Show me another sign that you are here with me. I knew you were at home with me when I heard that player go off and that song kept repeating Desert. That was the last word you said to me. I don’t know why but I felt like I needed to take you to the desert. I hope it was the right thing to do. Show me a sign that you are here. Show me a flock of birds fly above me and one land by me. That means we’ll be okay.”

I cried so hard as I Heard the words come flying out of his mouth. And just like that, I heard him. He looked to the right and noticed the birds flying by above him. He was in awe and so happy that tears silently fell down his face. And at the very end, one of the birds sat next to him. He was like, “I love you, my sweet angel.” That was when he let me fly away against the wind and just like that I was Engulfed in the desert's parched silence, I was nothing but another grain of sand in the wind.