Amelia: Love from the Past

Amelia gestured to a guard and a scroll was handed to Lin, Lin then turned sharply around and walked out the way she came. Cauzmantis bashfully followed Lin.

Cauzmantis Villinatus could finally breathe once they were back outside and looked at Lin with admiration. He couldn't help but think that Lin had been standoffish to her cousin Amelia for his benefit.

Amelia was the first girl Cauzmantis had ever told that he loved. They were just kids but the then 15-year-old Cauzmantis thought of marrying young Amelia.

When he was young and dating his first serious girlfriend Amelia, Cauzmantis remembered being much surer of himself and having less to worry about in general. Seeing Amelia like that for the first time in so long shocked him. Cauzmantis couldn't think straight. His mind first went to the fond feelings he still had for Amelia. She was still a beauty and had become a stunning grown woman. Cauzmantis felt insecure about his own appearance wearing rags for travel and battle. He regretted not having his usual kingly attire on.

His hair hadn't been serviced, nor his beard. Cauzmantis had shaved before the departure and felt as if his fuzzy face was unattractive. Cauzmantis had feelings of insecurity swelling up inside of him as he and Lin walked back to their troops.

His heart was heavy because he felt that Amelia saw him in an unflattering way. He felt like he had underrepresented himself to someone he wanted to be proud of him.

Is that all Cauzmantis wanted? For Amelia to be proud of him. Why did Cauzmantis not feel as if she would be? Of course, his clothes were not the finest he had ever worn but still, they were not rags of complete despair.

As Cauzmantis replayed the interaction over and over in his head, he couldn't help but feel inadequate. He really wished to have the comfort of his lavish carriage but Lin had denied him such a luxury. She said with battle inevitable only practical needs of transportation would be tolerated.

Cauzmantis sat defeated in the guest wagon that Lin agreed could offer the privacy of conversation for generals. Cauzmantis Villinatus was feeling like his heart had been ripped out of his chest and he really wasn’t sure why.

Maybe just maybe he felt that Amelia had always inspired him to reach with himself and become a better man. Since Cauzmantis was a mere boy during his flirtations with Amelia his logic was not completely sound. Nonetheless, Cauzmantis had mastered the art of letting his emotions overwhelm him.

His insecurities ran rampant about how she probably knew how unsuccessful Cauzmantis really was. Even as a king, he could barely manage reform and to chase the myth without backing from myth society.

Cauzmantis Villinatus was horrified knowing that Amelia could see him for what he truly was; a below-average washed-up small-time king hoping to make a comeback.

As the pity party began it seemed that Cauzmantis's true feelings were that of surprise that the reality in his mind had played tricks on him.

Although Cauzmantis had given a reunion with Amelia very little thought, when he saw her, he was immediately disappointed.

Cauzmantis at that moment, wished for himself to be in his finest royal garments, boasting clear symbols of wealth and power. He wished for Amelia to see an idol, a man amongst men with the highest esteem and status.

Instead, he felt that he was in the role of the dreamer, he was out of his comfort zone chasing a myth. Literally, but it made him feel alive.

Cauzmantis then had to ask himself the truth. Had he been in his finest robes and had the wealth in hand, would Amelia have wanted him back?

Cauzmantis had fallen victim to his own imagination again. There was no fairy tale magical reconnection to be had with Amelia.

They had both grown so far from that time when young love consumed them and true love was worth reputation. They had both become grown with responsibilities and obligations. Amelia had seemingly easily adapted to the flow of things. She put duty first rose to her task and became a powerful strong woman betrothed to a ruler who didn't have to earn his title through a myth. Meanwhile, Cauzmantis was a king who had often underachieved and settled for a kingdom that was lack luster. And now as an older man, he was pursuing the myth, greatness, and legacy things usually much easier obtained by the young.

But the king felt alive and remembered that his life had been full and magnificent apart from becoming as rich and powerful as other men of royalty.

He almost laughed at loud after the thought of his wonderful Retta. Why would he care to play what if and pretend as if things were not destined by the stars? His Retta, Princess Retta was perfection the only kind of perfection that could ever soothe Cauzmantis's tumultuous soul. The love Cauzmantis had for Retta could fill the ocean and cause him to start a revolution. He couldn't stand the thought of losing his Retta princess nor could he take that his carelessness had affected her.

An angel from angels the most beautiful smile and calming voice Cauzmantis had ever known belonged to his daughter Retta. Cauzmantis could no longer think of the past with Amelia, all he could think of was his love for his daughter Retta. She and Eve were the reason he was doing everything and his own ambition. Cauzmantis resolved that he had lived his life right. It was good to be ambitious but having people you love and trust while building your empire was a gift. And Cauzmantis did not take it for granted.

He wouldn't trade those wonderful nights of laughing, playing, and cuddling with Retta for anything in the world. His greatest accomplishment had been Eve and Retta and as he continued on the road...

It hit him that he had lost track of everything, he didn't know where they were headed and most importantly it had been hours.

He had not been vigilant for rebels or battles and had no idea of the plans. He had also been meaning to ask Lin what the list or scrolls contained.

Lin on the other hand had been fuming for over an hour while Cauzmantis sulked away in the only thing resembling a carriage. Lin cursed herself for agreeing to bring it. Lin had luckily been calming down the entire time Cauzmantis had been realizing that his life was just fine.

Lin could guess that Cauzmantis had been indulging in his emotional thoughts she figured it was what he did with ALL of his alone time. She also realized that once again his habit had kept him shielded from the political undertones that the myth was attached to.

Just like in the original uprising, Cauzmantis seemed to always be preoccupied with other matters as the society of myth believers’ agendas were earned on the back of Lin and Cauzmantis.

Lin saw Cauzmantis as a pawn and tool for society and their agendas but what bothered her the most was that Cauzmantis seemed clueless about his own involvement.

The list that Amelia had handed Lin contained information coordinates and Intel on all the society of the believer’s enemies. Almost political because the society of the myth originally used their majority to suppress the minority leading to the creation of other societies that pushed back against the society of believers.

Cauzmantis was clueless that the uprising that he but mostly Lin executed resulted in massive rewards for members of the society, as well as massive casualties for innocents caught in the middle.

The list was sure to contain at least some innocents by Lin's standards, and Lin found it odd that Cauzmantis had to start his journey to chasing the myth with...