Why I Moved Back in with My Parents

by Kjia Welte 2 years ago in advice

Contrary to popular belief, it's not the end of the world.

Why I Moved Back in with My Parents

If you're reading this, you're most likely at the age where kids are expected to move out soon (or to have already moved out long ago), and wondering if you should or not. I can't tell you what to do—that's your prerogative—but maybe I can help you figure it out.

To give some background, I'm 20 and currently in the process of moving back in with my parents. I moved out when I was 19 after finally giving in to my friend's constant nudging about me moving in with her. I'd never really thought I'd move out until my mid-20's, mostly because of my inability to decide on what to do with my life. But we talked it out—dividing up rent, the freedom of living on our own, and just spending every day together—so I decided to go for it. It was great!

Now financially, the only way I could afford this place was with my three roommates; my paycheck just doesn't make the cut. So when one of them moved out only three months later things got pretty tight. Luckily I had a nice enough cushion in my bank account from when I lived with my parents so that sizable increase in rent didn't hurt too bad. Of course, that could only last so long, even with a strict budget. Basically, I had to make a choice.

A lot was going through my head over the past couple months, and I mean a lot.

"I couldn't even make it a full year on my own!"

"I can't just leave my other roommates hanging!"

"Should I quit school and get another job?"

"What are my parents gonna say?"

These are just a few prominent ones, the list goes on and on. And if you've been a situation like this one then you can probably relate. It's absolutely exhausting. Dealing with college, work, and personal life caught up way too fast and it was overwhelming. It still is! But after living through these last five months I can say that I've finally decided to move back out.

My parents and I haven't always been super close; when I lived at home we had the occasional conversation when our schedules aligned but not much else. Yet after moving out, I realized how close we actually were. As such, they were extremely willing to help when I initially told them about the situation and they constantly wanted updates. But it was still a relief when they told me I could always come back home.

Deep down I knew that I would move out sooner than later, but only recently have I come to terms with the fact. Telling my roommates was a little rough, only because I'd never really brought up my inner struggles to them, but luckily they had someone in mind that could take my place when I leave.

I asked myself "why was I so worried?" But as they say, hindsight is always 20/20. Figuring it all out took time, and I could finally tamp down all those anxious thoughts I was having.

The fact of the matter is that it's perfectly fine to need help. Like I said, I was only 19 when I moved out into the great big world thinkingI was ready. In a sense I was. Things change however, most of the time it comes abruptly and leaves you scrambling to adjust. Sometimes the change is just too much. There's no harm in quitting; I'd like to think of it as a well deserved break, and use this time to re-evaluate and reflect.

Don't get me wrong, I've loved the time I've spent here and I'm saddened to leave my roommates—my best friends—behind. Moving back home doesn't mean that I'll just throw this experience away. Sometimes you just have to start fresh.

Kjia Welte
Kjia Welte
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