'What' and 'How' You Say Things Affects Your Child's Temperament

How often have we been told that we should choose our words wisely or think before speaking? A lot of timings. But how many times do we actually abide by this advice? Rarely, right? As per an article published by the United Press International, some studies conducted by cognitive scientists claim that our speech and choice of words are partially planned. That means we don’t think before opening our mouth.

While this habit affects professional life, relationships, and social impressions, it also hampers our children’s temperament. Though it takes a human brain 25 years to develop itself ultimately, The early childhood period experiences rapid and significant changes in the brain. It is during the early and middle childhood that the brain forms its intricate network of connections. Thus, this time phrase is said to be the most crucial one.

We have heard numerous cases of childhood trauma affecting a person’s adult life. But have we ever thought where this childhood trauma comes from? A study from NCBI, USA, states that 47% of childhood trauma cases are because of verbal abuse. Conclusion? What we say and how we say it affects our children’s emotional, mental, and personality development.

Yelling at your children or using negative words to stop them from doing something can make your child hesitant and fearful and hamper his psychological and personality development. This can impact his decisions and actions as an adult. On the other hand, using a positive vocabulary with a normal tone of voice, even in the most disturbing scenarios, can leave a positive impact on your child’s mind.

There are a lot of studies in the field of medical science that highlight a change in the structure of the gray matter of the brain when exposed to verbal abuse. Apart from it, children who have been brought up in an environment of negative vocabulary, unwanted yelling, and threatening struggle with negative emotions in adulthood. This makes them sensitive towards rejection and increases their chances of being depressed and anxious.

Not only this, at times the way you converse with other family members like parents, spouse, etc. also impacts a child’s mind. It is vital to be aware of what you are saying and how you are making it sound so that it does not create a negative influence over your child. Keep in mind that children spend a lot of their time with their parents, and during the initial years of their lives, they learn from them.

Your speech and tone will leave a substantial effect on your child, his thought process, emotional development, psychological development, and personality. Make sure to give a thoughtful reaction to everything that they do. If your child is doing something appropriate, encourage him by motivating words.

However, if you find them indulging in an inappropriate act, rather than scolding him or saying him a ‘no,’ try explaining to him why he should not do it. Being aware of how you talk to and around your child will not only positively impact him but will also strengthen your bond with him. Parents who are not verbally or physically harsh on their children tend to be the secret-keepers and go-to people of their child in their teen and adult days.