TRADITIONAL WEDDING OF TAMILNADU

Weddings in South India, especially among the Tamil community, differ considerably from those in the North. While North Indian weddings are often marked by opulence and grandeur, Tamil weddings prioritize customs and traditions over extravagance. The spiritual and symbolic significance of a wedding is of utmost importance in Tamil weddings, even though there are many fun-filled moments during the big event with distant relatives in attendance. Tamil weddings, known as Kalyanam, take place on all days of the Tamil calendar except for Aashad, Bhadrapad and Shunya. The following are some of the important Tamil wedding rituals.

Matching the horoscopes of the bride and groom or NakshatraPorutham is given great importance in Tamil weddings. The Vedic guidelines are used to match twelve points or Poruthams, such as Nadi, Yoni, Rasi, Gana, etc. The matching of horoscopes determines various aspects of the wedding, including the date, auspicious moment or muhurtha, and other rituals.

Once the marriage is fixed, the priests on both sides draft the marriage agreement. The two sides exchange the marriage agreements on a platter containing bananas, betel leaves, betel nuts, and a coconut, and gifts are also exchanged between the families.

The Panda Kaal Muhurtham ritual is observed by both the bride’s and the groom’s families together. The two families visit a temple or organize a special puja at one of the homes, where they pray to the Almighty for the wedding to take place without any obstacles. This is generally done on the day before the wedding.

Sumangali Prarthanai is a special puja directed towards the Sumangalis or married women who take part in various wedding rituals. Generally, these women are close relatives and family friends. The women, usually in odd numbers like three, five, or seven, get dressed in traditional nine-yard Madisar sarees. After the puja is over, the bride seeks blessings from each Sumangali and gives her a special gift like a saree or jewelry. They are also treated to a special lunch.

Earthenware pots decorated with vermillion and sandalwood paste by five or seven married women of the family or both the bride and the groom’s families signify the Pallikal Thellichal ritual. Inside each pot, nine different types of grains or navadhaanyam are placed, along with a bit of curd. A Kolam, traditional south Indian sand art design believed to bring good luck, is prepared at a special spot within the house.

The Vrutham ritual takes place at the groom’s place on the early mornings of the day before the wedding. The day signifies the transition of the groom from the Bachelorhood or Brahmacharya phase of life to the Domestic or Garhasthaya phase. He seeks permission from his guru, usually his father, to proceed to this phase. A sacred thread, colored yellow with turmeric, is tied around the groom’s wrists. In a similar ceremony or puja, a yellow thread is also tied around the bride’s wrists. This thread is said to protect the bride and groom from evil energy.

The Nishchayathram is the formal engagement ceremony in Tamil weddings. The ritual begins with a puja to Lord Ganesh at the bride’s home. The groom’s family arrives at the bride’s house and gifts a beautiful saree to the seated bride, along with some jewelry. They then apply a spot of sandalwood paste and vermillion on the bride’s forehead. The sumangalis from both sides fill up the free end of the bride’s saree with rice, fruits, coconut, flower, turmeric, betel nut, and betel.

Villaku Poojai – This ritual involves the bride and the groom separately performing a puja to a brass lamp or Villaku. The Villaku represents the divine light and is believed to bring prosperity and happiness to the couple. The bride's family priest performs the puja for the bride, while the groom’s family priest performs the same for the groom.

Mangala Snaanam – This is the ritual bath taken by the bride and the groom before the wedding ceremony. It symbolizes the purification of the body and the mind before starting a new life together. The bride and the groom wear new clothes after the bath.

Kashi Yatra – This is a fun ritual where the groom pretends to renounce the worldly life and decides to go to Kashi or Varanasi, which is considered a holy place. The bride’s father intervenes and convinces the groom to come back and marry his daughter. This ritual signifies the importance of family and marriage.

Pada Puja – In this ritual, the bride’s parents wash the feet of the groom and offer him gifts. This symbolizes the respect and love they have for the groom and their acceptance of him as a part of their family.

Muhurtham – This is the most important part of the wedding ceremony, where the bride and the groom exchange garlands, take vows and get married in front of the sacred fire or Agni. The bride and the groom walk around the fire seven times, taking seven vows, and tying the sacred knot or Mangalsutra, which symbolizes their union.

Saptapadi – This is the final ritual of the wedding ceremony, where the bride and the groom take seven steps together, symbolizing their journey through life. With each step, they take a vow to fulfill their responsibilities towards each other and their families.

Sammandhi Maryadai – This is a ritual where the families of the bride and the groom exchange gifts and acknowledge their relationship. The bride’s family presents the groom’s family with gifts and vice versa.

Reception – A reception is usually held after the wedding, where friends and family come together to celebrate the union of the bride and the groom. The newlywed couple is blessed by the elders, and everyone enjoys a feast and music.

In conclusion, Tamil weddings are a beautiful blend of tradition, spirituality, and celebration. These weddings are a perfect example of how simplicity and elegance can come together to create a memorable event. While there may not be a lot of extravagance, there is definitely no shortage of love and joy in a Tamil wedding.