There’s no Such Thing as a 50/50 Relationship

You, the reader are probably wondering what you mean there’s no equality in a relationship. Well, it’s true especially if you’re in a straight relationship and have “old-fashioned” values. I will strictly talk about myself. I have always wanted children and a marriage to a man. That’s something I have always dreamed of when I knew what marriage was. I pictured myself walking down the aisle with my future husband to be wearing a long white dress and throwing my bouquet into the gaggle of women. Here’s the reality though a man who wants a family cannot expect his wife to work a job while taking care of children and making dinner. That’s not 50/50 a true 50/50 relationship would look different. The woman would work half the time and the other half taking care of the children. The man would be expected to do the same. That is clearly not the case, most women are expected to come home from work, make dinner for the family, make sure the children do their homework, do the laundry and put them to bed. It’s true you could ask your husband to help out, but the woman does all the housework while the man goes to a football game or goes to his basement den. The expectation is too high, yes a single mom can do all those things. I am not saying it’s not possible to do those things but every partner in a relationship has roles they will fall into. Maternal instinct still exists and when a mother hears her baby crying she wants to comfort him or her as best she can. In most households, it’s common for a woman to go to work the same as the man. But this usually happens after her children reach an age where they are capable of taking care of themselves. Then, what usually happens is that the woman comes home makes dinner and cleans up while her supposed equal other half is sitting on the couch watching the game. Where is the 50/50 in that relationship? It does not exist.

A man who has a plan for a family and finances is the man you want to be with. Someone who has no plan and has no stability is a man a woman can never depend on for her to have his children and raise them. A man who wants a family is no doubt expecting a woman to raise his children. He goes to work, she does all the work at home. He makes the money, she takes care of the crying child when he or she is having a day. Two parents cannot each go to work as if nothing has impacted their lives. Eventually. though that is possible once a child is going to school simply to make financial sense and be able to afford a car and a house. A man should have a sense of wanting to protect and provide for a woman he should be doing that easily. A man opens the door for a woman, and she gets offended because he opened the door, and then she goes around asking why her man won’t buy her flowers. Probably because he thinks she can do it herself. That’s not okay. We can’t have it both ways it does not work like that.

The first few years of childhood are so important some people think that getting a nanny is the solution…that doesn’t make sense to me. Why would you have a nanny take care of the children you supposedly “wanted” when you are never around? Baby sitter for a day or two is completely understandable but to hire a nanny? I just don’t understand that concept.