The wisest way to do things: don't take what others say seriously

One of the main reasons why we are always in trouble is that we can neither put ourselves at the center, nor be absolutely pleasing to others.

Therefore, I believe that people should be good at themselves to deal with good relationships, because the center of people is often more important than self-worth.

01. Focus on your own worth

"The essence of self-discipline is the realization of self-worth."

Self-worth is often the center of interpersonal communication, and it is also the magic weapon to overcome all things.

We can find the essential problem of a life, that is, most of people's friends come from your value, where your value is, where your friends are.

When a person has no value, often people around you will leave you, neither money, nor power, which will make our life more difficult.

Humans are very selfish animals and like to approach more powerful and powerful people in the hope that they will pull you up.

But often our self-worth is also very important, through which we can realize our ideals.

As a practical example, I once had a classmate whose family was very powerful and even had connections and connections in the whole city. When he was in school, his teachers took special care of him.

At that time, I was too young to understand the way of the world. Later, when I grew up, I realized that it was not only a simple relationship between teachers and students, but also a replacement of interpersonal communication.

But interpersonal relationship is really important, we should not regard it as the only lifeblood, the only standard. For example, I also have many excellent classmates. Through my own efforts, I have been admitted to a very good school, and I also have a high score after graduation.

I believe there will be many friends around them in the future, because the value of interpersonal communication is the value itself, maybe emotional value, maybe material value, maybe resource value.

This is human nature, we should also correctly look at this problem, do not struggle, do not have to force, we improve their strength is the first.

When you can stand to a certain height and achieve a certain degree, you will naturally see the essence around you and see different values.

02. Turn a deaf ear to him

"When you focus too much on others, you distract yourself and shift your focus."

Sometimes we are easily influenced by the external environment and easily moved by the words of others.

I am a person who is easily influenced by external factors, and many things said by others will affect me.

When I just graduated from college, I was very undetermined. I saw that many classmates around me, even those who were not as good as me before, were living a good life, had stable jobs, and some were even ready to get married.

However, my work is not stable, and there is no love, so everything is not satisfactory, neither the accumulation of money, nor a good emotional dependence, resulting in me very decadent.

Later, I felt that such things were too painful for me. I slowly began to learn to clean up my emotions. I did not listen to other people's things, and I did not pay attention to them.

What others said, how much money, bought what car, boyfriend to their own how good, I just superficial echo, heart slowly learned not to touch.

I believe that other people's business is always other people's business, not mine.

I don't have to envy, I don't have to deliberately put a low posture, I have my own way to go, I also have my own life.

So slowly also won't be those messy things involved in my emotions, also won't be those things make me uncomfortable.

The essential difference between people and animals is that people can think, people have emotions.

When we feel our heart is not happy, uncomfortable, not comfortable, we need to learn to adjust in time, those who have nothing to do with you to take away, you can love yourself.

Even in the past how to be good friends, as they grow up will change, not as sincere as before.

03. Learn balance

Haruki Murakami once said: "Good and evil are not static things, but constantly changing places and positions, balance itself is a kind of good."

Balance can achieve greatness and power that we can't really imagine. Everything in our lives needs balance.

There has been a balance between Yin and Yang since ancient times, and the reality is the same. Everything and everything will have a certain balance law, just like a feedback from something you make.

There should also be a proper balance between the mind and the mind. When you are emotionally troubled, simply release it or block it out.

And when you are sober and independent and have their own opinions and cognition, we have to think about some of the value of life, think about some ideas and behaviors.

So move forward in balance, rather than blindly obsessing over emotions and being controlled by the outside world.

Everything has the power of feedback, a small thought, even a small action, do not know when it will come back to you in another way.

So we have to learn to balance, balance emotion, balance virtue, balance good and evil, and put ourselves in a balanced state of mind.

The same is true of our social status. The relationship between people needs to be balanced. Too close relationship will lead to exclusion, while too close relationship will lead to distance, so we should learn to balance the relationship.

Also learn to balance the state of mind, in the final analysis of the evaluation of others are derived from their own expression of a feeling.

People in a good state of mind naturally see what is pleasing to the eye, flowers and trees, everything is beautiful.

Other people who don't balance their mind and emotions tend to be angry and resentful, so that's the difference between the two, and the result is different.

We need to learn to adjust our thoughts to plan our lives.