married
The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.'
Reality Check
My family and I moved to California in the beginning of the year. We came here on military orders for my husband. With so many positives to the move such as money from selling our house, being paid for the move, taxes, the thoughts of greater opportunities because DUH its Cali! But BOOM reality check!!! Cali is much more expensive than North Carolina AND my husbands pay got cut because we are living on base. I don't have a job. Our kids are not in daycare. Months go by and we are slowly chipping into our savings. Putting a hold on the kids investment accounts. Things start to fall downhill money wise for us. I start looking for jobs and calling daycares. Well due to covid daycares are all full with waitlists out to the end of the year. Which means...no job for me. I could get a 2nd or 3rd shift job and go to work after my husband gets home but his hours being military are not set hours. One day he could be off at noon and the next day he won't be off until 6pm OR the next week have to go to the field all week. With upcoming month long trainings and deployment....we are stuck with a tough decision. And this decision caused a HUGE argument and hard feelings. Either we stay in Cali and watch ourselves slowly go broke and I have zero support from family and friends while he is away for deployment. Or the kids and I move back home so I can get a job the kids go to daycare get a set schedule and our money starts to increase and we have family support while my husband stays in Cali. We chose option number 2. I got daycare lined up for them back in Pennsylvania. Now we will have 2 years separated until he is out of the military. 2 years of our kids seeing their daddy only on holidays. 2 years our marriage will be put to the test. And ohhh my anxiety. The overthinking that will occur and already has. I know I can trust him but the thoughts that he will be here with only himself to worry about in California while i'm back in Pennsylvania raising our children. And yes as horrible as it may sound I am envious of all the sleep he will get. All the down time. Being able to go out and not worry about having to rush because of the kids. He can do anything he pleases. But my duty as a mom continues and will only be harder without daddy around. Along with getting a full time job. My plate is going to be beyond full. I forgot to also mention our dog. Which I also get the responsibility of. But it will be best for the kids to get a regular schedule, a home to call home, the foods they want because we can afford it, toys when they want, family love and support. And on a positive for myself, I can try to find myself again without the distraction of him. I love him with all my heart and am so grateful for all he has done but boy did i get caught up in being a mom and being a wife I lost who I am alone. As I’m sure many women go through this and struggle to find who they are or want to be after becoming a mom. You get so caught up in your kids their safety and spending every moment you can with them because you know it won’t last forever. We sacrifice and always do what’s best for the sake of our children just as it should be. So here’s to our new journey to finding stability and a long term home for our kids and also as spouses finding ourselves in the time we are having apart from each other to build our marriage stronger and happier which will also be so very healthy for our babies. They don’t understand very much right now but because of the military they are used to daddy coming and going for long periods of time. It’s so sad and not how things should be and this won’t be easy but the hardest of things could have the greatest outcomes. Here’s to new journeys!
Kalista TamborskiPublished 2 months ago in FamiliesI’ll Be Happy When I’m Married to the Right Person
If you’ve been in a marriage or committed relationship for some length of time, you may be experiencing something that you are reluctant to share even with your closest family and friends—boredom. Although this may seem like a paltry or self-indulgent problem, it can begin with petty misgivings and complaints and ultimately snowball into dissatisfactions and breakup daydreams that plague you and poison your relationship. Your first instinct may be to end the marriage, but you don’t know whether you should or how to go about it. Instead, you may be hurting, consumed with guilt, ruminating about your feelings, making excuses, and oscillating between paralysis and panic.
Obajuwon IsraelPublished 2 months ago in FamiliesMy Husband Has Become So Boring (How To Be Happy With A Boring Husband)
All married couples experience problems now and then; it is simply the fact of life. But how we handle those problems makes a real difference between a good and a bad marriage.
Melody KhloePublished 2 months ago in FamiliesBad things are said before marriage
I've seen two types of girls, the smart ones and the anxious ones. That's what a smart girl says when a man proposes.
The Best Chaotic Day
I had just turned 18 when I met my husband, and we were wed right before I turned 20. Both of us were very young. He was 20 when we got married and later that year, he turned 21. Despite our ages, we thought we were ready to get married. And at the time it seemed right. I ended up getting pregnant and he wanted to do things right and get married before she was born. I did not really want that, if I'm being honest. I had always thought of having a big wedding, the white dress, and all of our friends and family. I really did not want to get married at 38 weeks pregnant (which did happen).
Rebecca MoorePublished 2 months ago in FamiliesWhat caused you to avoid a lifetime of guilt?
This is the true story of a husband whose wife asked him to go on a date with another woman, but what she forced him to do saved him from a lifetime of guilt. My wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie after 21 years of marriage. "I love you," she said, "but I know this other woman loves you and wants to spend time with you."
He Dumped His Family After Housing A Ukrainian Refugee Lady For 10 Days
This happened in a UK family of four where the husband walked out of their eight years of relationship. The husband is a twenty-nine-year-old working as a security guard and the wife is a twenty-eight-year-old raising two kids aged six and three respectively.
Life LessonPublished 3 months ago in FamiliesIn this life, a wife is enough
In this life, a wife is enough It's true that there are misfortunes in heaven and fortune in man. My wife was about to go to the hospital when she heard that her left foot was hurt. She told her that she was going to the hospital for the next three days. She was in a hurry. I hurriedly asked the leader for leave and took a taxi to the central hospital.
jenkinssb38 huionasertuPublished 3 months ago in FamiliesMy Life as a Mom right out of High School and Military Wife
As we traveled from Pennsylvania to North Carolina with our daughter, we had vast emotions. I remember the excitement of all the newness. The surroundings, the freedom to be on our own. But also the fear, the fear of being on our own. My husband is 20 at the time and I’m 19. Just 2 years ago I would have never guessed I’d have a baby, get married, and be owning a home right out of high school. It almost seems a fairytale.
Kalista TamborskiPublished 3 months ago in FamiliesMarriage and Family Counseling (Will Marriage Counseling Save My Marriage)
Every single day thousands of unhappy couples seek the services of a professional marriage counselor at the rate of $100 or more per hour in the hopes of saving their marriage. That statistic indicates that saving a marriage is pretty important to a lot of couples. But does marriage counseling work at saving a marriage or is it $100 per hour down the drain?
Melody KhloePublished 3 months ago in FamiliesTop 10 Relationship Advice From Over 2500 Happily Married Couples
I think a lot of newlyweds do this—ask for relationship advice, I mean, not shit the same bed—especially after a few cocktails from the open bar they just paid for.
Shobha TiwariPublished 3 months ago in FamiliesMonogamy vs. Ethical Non-Monogamy
What is Ethical Non-Monogamy? ...And why is it such a mouthful? Well, all relationships are a mouthful, aren't they? ‘Ethical Non-Monogamy’ just keeps it real. But for all our sakes, I'll refer to it as ENM from here on.