Songs I Will Always Associate With My Father

In honor of my father's ninth death anniversary coming around the corner (September 19th), I felt like I owed it to him to use my love for writing to create an article in his memory.

Now I have written about my father plenty of times; sometimes in happy terms, other times in not-so-happy times. You can read them all in the links below: How I Survived The Loss Of My Father, The Reason I Write, I Love(d) You, and Dear Daddy.

If you lost someone who was close to you (i.e. a parent, grandparent, family friend, etc.), then you probably fully understand exactly what I mean when I say that sometimes you can get memories at the most random of times. For me, I get them when I listen to certain songs, visit certain places, or even talk about certain topics. I still find myself collecting all things baseball simply because I feel like I'd disappoint my father if I didn't continue to do so. After nine years, I still feel like I'm betraying my father if I don't at least keep him on my mind when I travel or go on road trips with my mom. When it comes to songs.. well let's just say, I made myself an entire Spotify playlist dedicated to any song I hear that either reminds me of my father or reminds me of a specific memory I shared with him (you can find that playlist here - I promise, the songs are actually good.).

1. Meet Me In Montana - Dan Seals/Marie Osmond

I doubt I'll ever be able to listen to this song without thinking of my father. Anytime I play it, I can't help but think about the long drives I'd take with him in his work truck (I wasn't supposed to ride along in it, which I can say now.. what are they going to do, fire him?) as he sang along to this song whenever it played on the radio. This was the song that made me love Marie Osmond's voice so I always perked up whenever I would hear it play.

2. You Needed Me/Could I Have This Dance - Anne Murray

These two songs will always hold a special place in my heart because they both remind me so much of how my parent's love used to be portrayed at the beginning. These two songs, You Needed Me & Could I Have This Dance are exactly how I want to remember the love my parents once shared. Plus, Could I Have This Dance by Anne Murray was my parents' song during their wedding so that helps a bit in linking them to this song.

"I'll always remember, the song they were playing.. the first time we danced, and I knew.. as we swayed to the music, and held to each other.. I fell in love with you." -Could I Have This Dance, Anne Murray

3. I Wouldn't Have Missed It for the World - Ronnie Milsap

"Our paths may never cross again.. Maybe my heart will never mend.. But I'm glad for all the good times.. Cause you've brought me so much sunshine.. And love was the best it's ever been."

Call me an emotional sap, but I can't help but imagine this song as something my dad would sing to my mother from heaven. Like yes, I know.. my parents separated towards the end of his life but I still can't help but imagine it. It all started back with a memory I have of my dad silently singing this out loud along to this song on the radio as we drove out to dinner one night, and now that memory will forever be imprinted in my mind as my father singing it to my mother. I just like to think that, after everything he put her through, he still loved and cared deeply enough to regret the pain he caused for her.

"I Wouldn't have missed it for the world.. Wouldn't have missed loving you girl.. You've made my whole life worth while, with your smile.. I wouldn't trade one memory.. Cause you mean too much to me.. Even though I lost you girl, I wouldn't have missed it for the world.. They say all good things must end.. Love comes and goes just like the wind.. You've got your dreams to follow.. But if I had the chance tomorrow, You'd know I'd do it all again."

4. He Stopped Loving Her Today - George Jones

"He said "I'll love you till I die".. She told him "You'll forget in time".. As the years went slowly by.. She still prayed upon his mind.."

You know.. when I was younger, I remember asking my father what this song was about. I used to be so obsessed with it and he'd joke about how I was "so morbid".. but I couldn't help it. It was a good tune. Of course, I never truly understood the actual message of the song until I lost my own father. I will never believe that it took something of THAT nature for me to finally fully understand what this song was actually about.

There was something about this song that gave me some peace with this song and the memory of my father. All it took was for me to think about how this song was him.. how the "he stopped loving her today" resembled a combination of myself, my mother, his sister, and his mother.

"He stopped loving her today.. They placed a wreath upon her door.. And soon, they'll carry him away.."

Now I keep a photo of him on my wall to honor him and keep his memory alive.. hoping he'd come back again to give me the biggest bear hug he has ever given me. Even after nine years of him being gone, I still have days where I firmly believe he'll be back again to see what I've been up too. I doubt that'll ever stop though..

5. The Grand Tour - George Jones

This song is always going to live rent-free in my heart. It was one of the very first country songs my dad had introduced me to that I was completely obsessed with. Of course, I never truly understood the meaning behind the lyrics until the day my father walked out on my mom and I, but I won't ever let that affect the love I shared with this song.

Listening to this song will almost always get me emotional because my father will always come into mind whenever it plays. The long car rides I took with him.. dancing around the kitchen as we listened to his CDs when we were home alone.. no matter what, this song will always play a positive memory of him for me anything I listen to it. For that reason alone, I'm obsessed with playing it.

6. Hello Darlin' - Conway Twitty

"Hello darlin'.. Nice to see you.. It's been a long time.. You're just as lovely.. As you used to be.. Are you happy.. Hope your doin' fine.. Just to know it.. Means so much to me.."

I'm pretty positive my dad only listened to this song because I loved it, but it's still worthy enough to go on the list.

"I love you and I miss you.. And I'm so sorry that I did you wrong.. Let me hold you.. In my arms one more time.. Thank you darlin'.. May God bless you.. And may each step you take.. Bring you closer.. To the things you seek to find.. "

7. Wildfire - Michael Martin Murphey

This song used to be the biggest comfort song for me. It still is. No matter how many songs I hear in my life, or how many I'll obsess over, nothing will ever hit me as hard as this song hit me. Of course, I can't listen to it anymore without crying buckets.. it is still one of the go-to songs for when I need a good jam. If I ever forgot the existence of this one song, that's the end of the world as we know it.

8. The Xanadu Soundtrack

Yes. The ENTIRE soundtrack deserves to be on this list. Hell. Not just the soundtrack.. let's put the whole movie up on this list as well because it still counts.

My dad played Xanadu for me when I was a kid and ever since then, it has been my all-time favorite work of art that involved Olivia Newton John (and that says a lot considering how much I adore the movie Grease). The minute I saw the mural scene while I'm Alive played was the moment I realized I loved this film.

My dad and I used to always discuss Xanadu and that scene in particular on the walks we used to take together. I was so obsessed with this one scene that he just eventually burned the song I'm Alive onto a CD so that I could listen to it endlessly.

9. I Loved Her First - Heartland

I found this song on YouTube back when my father first passed and the second I pressed play, I knew I had found it for a reason. The most painful part about this song is the fact that my father never got to have this feeling with me before he passed.. but the song is still worthy of this list. Technically, I do still associate it with my dad in some way.

10. You Can Let Go Now, Daddy - Patricia Maguire

I found this song the same time I found the last song (I Loved Her First by Heartland), except this song affected me differently than the last. I used to listen to this song at the lowest points of my depression whenever I needed a good cry. For the longest time, I was actually afraid to turn this song on in fear that I'd sink back into that time of my life again. It did take quite a bit of healing, but eventually I was able to listen to this song again. Now, I recite the final lyrics of this song as I look up towards the sky as if I'm actually saying them to him.

"You can let go now, daddy.. You can let go.. Your little girl is ready.. to do this on my own.. It's gonna be a little bit scary.. But I want you to know.. I'll be okay now, daddy.. You can let go.."

11. Don't Close Your Eyes - Keith Whitley

I have no idea when or where I heard this song, but it recently resurfaced back into my life and I immediately thought back to the times I spent listening to music with my dad. For that exact reasoning, I just added it to the list. My father and I have listened to many songs together so I'm sure throughout my life, I'd probably have many situations just like this one.. but when I do, I will still hold each and every one of those songs close to my heart.

12. Surfin' USA - The Beach Boys

Although this statement probably does partially go for any song from The Beach Boys, it was mostly the song Surfin' U.S.A. that we played in the memory.

As stated above, my dad and I used to have nights when we'd go through his CDs and play through everything in his collection while I'd dance around the kitchen (usually he'd be cooking dinner or organizing his collections). But every single time we'd play this song, I would just stop in place and start to pretend as if I was surfing across the ocean. It got to the point where I did every single time the song came on, even if we were in the car (which let me just say was not an easy thing to do). Eventually, if the song came on, my dad would point it out to me knowing exactly what I was about to do.

It became an inside joke between the two of us and for that very reason, this song has made it onto the list.

13. Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh - Allan Sherman

From the day my father introduced this to me to today, I have been absolutely obsessed with this song. If I didn't add this to the list, I feel like I'd be disrespecting my father.

14. Right There - Ramzi

To end the list, I figured what's more fitting to put the most recently added song to the last of the list. I recently discovered this song while browsing through the music choices on Spotify, and my father was the first person to come to mind. Anytime I listen to this song, I can't help but imagine him speaking the lyrics out to me. Honestly, I am actually convinced that it was a sign to have found this song so close to his death anniversary. It's almost as if my father is trying to tell me that he's still here, right by my side, going along with me for the adventure of a lifetime.

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Thank you for taking the time to read my writings. For more of my writings, feel free to check out my profile. I write a mixture of articles and fictional stories from short stories to a young adult novel I am currently working on.

xo Mel