She taught me how to self-heal

This is written to and for my mother Andrea, an open and honest narrative style letter, to thank her for being there to show me and guide to through life.

I remember days of therapeutic shopping, of days where I would randomly get picked up from elementary school to go the theatre down the road to see the latest flick and remembering how these breaks would always help me.

During the days I would be sad, or feeling blue, she would call me off of school---stating on the letter I was not "up to par" and would not be in session for that day. Everything that lead up to these moments, they gave me a semblance of stability and safety after.

I have a special relationship with the cinema due to my mom. She would always take us to the movies almost every week, to see every and any film that had just come out. She loved the cinema in general, and the thrill of waiting for the movie to start with her on a school day, getting picked up as a surprise, there was nothing better. My best memories are going into a theater and out----the feelings before and after---it was always a contrast. Sometimes if the movie was sad, I would be crying, if it was funny, I would be smiling.... but overall, the feeling of something wonderful----of the whole experience of the cinema was something I loved very much with my mother.

During periods of time where I felt disengaged or feeling unmotivated to do things I needed to do(chores, cleaning, etc.), she would always be there to sit with me, doing little things in increments of time with breaks---passing the time with chats of the future and of plans we could do together.

Her ideas of keeping very organized (filing, budgeting, etc.) were something I admired, as her way of keeping a strict schedule for everything as well as how she ran her household was very shipshape----and to this day I look to her for advice on these matters.

I would always whisper WEHRENBERG a hundred times after too, chomping down on various snacks and candies, heart pounding.

What I come back to with all of these good memories with her is this:

1. Always take a mental day for yourself. Have a bit of fun. Treat yourself.
2. Find things to do to help keep your sense of security and safety. Even if it is just by having someone there to keep you company and talk (or listen) to you while you do something necessary.
3. Keep everything as organized and as minimalistic as possible to avoid clutter. After so many years or months, get rid of old files, irrelevant receipts or any other unimportant things that you do not need to mark a new year.

The idea of self-healing came to me through her use of the "not up to par" suggestion she had relayed on my sick notes---something I thought, as a child, was revolutionary.

I never thought you could just say----hey, I am not up to it today. I thought that was wrong, bad and something frowned upon. It may sound simple. It is simple.

But it is something society cannot get---cannot implement into the general workplace---and if it did, I can see a lot of people turning their noses at it.

But, one day, I hope to see something like that for people. Just a day for you to unwind, relax---not do anything. You don't have to be sick----or in a hospital, or have anything serious happen---it is just a day for YOU.

Self-heal and self-love seems like a controversial subject whenever the subject of work and careers come up, unless it is a company that is REALLY up to par with mental wellness, and how overworking can effect productivity and their employees. I would love to see it become a normal thing for our country and the world----not just a mental health awareness day, but days set aside for everyone----working and non-working----to just relax and find their center.

Another thing she always has done and continues to do is support my writing. Reading my stories, giving me honest feedback and support, she always has the best advice or ideas to inspire new pieces!

I love you, mom!

Love, always,

Melissa