My Favourite Things About Mum

For as long as I can remember, I have been quick to align with my father and find fault with my mum. Maybe it is because she was quite hard on us as we grew. As a teenager and young adult, I sometimes felt she was too old school. Why talk to me about rules, regulations, and customs that aren't exactly in keeping with the times? Somewhere along the way, I learned to look at things more holistically and with less bias. My favorite things about mum are:

Kindness: Many times, I have watched mom show kindness to many people. Some of them have been family, others have been friends and others have been strangers. She has done this consistently from my childhood to adulthood. The beautiful thing about this trait is that in a world where many things have gone berserk, it helps to see someone remind us consistently of things that matter.

Mum shows up: As children, we resented mum for her discipline. However, as we grew older, I observed mum always showed up for things one might quickly overlook. If you had relationship troubles, she would listen. She may or may not dish out advice. If there were academic troubles, she would find you extra tutoring. If you had financial troubles, she would help to bail you out. Sometimes, she would teach you financial principles that would last you a long time. I could go on with the list but at least, you catch my drift.

Practicality: Mum is so down to earth. As a teenager, it was rather hard to appreciate as sometimes, her utterances came across as scandalous. However, as an adult, I appreciate time and time again the ability to demystify and simplify things. You get that feeling when someone talks to you in a way that says: "You'll get through this and this too shall pass."

Endurance: My parents' marriage was over four decades old and they reared six kids. Marriage isn't the easiest of institutions and could not have been easy on either of them. Through those years, I watched mum endure and accommodate excesses. I watched her stretch. She would bend over and backward and go above and beyond. Initially, I did not quite appreciate where that strength came from, but with time, I knew.

Prayer: Mum's endurance comes from prayer. At points where she should break, she would pray and gain extra strength. Time and time again, she prioritized prayer above all else. Over time, it was the best part of her we emulated. It became even more important when each of us faced our life challenges. We had a resource that was tested and proven. Many times, her friends, and siblings would come to her for counseling. She seemed to have a working formula. A combination of practical advice, exercising common or uncommon sense plus a dose of prayer was the winning formula.

Loyalty: My mum is loyal to her family. She believes so much in that honor. She would make plans and prioritize with that in mind. There are days you would ask mum about her itinerary. You would expect to hear something extraordinary. Mum would list tasks and duties mostly revolving around family and friends. Sometimes, I would laugh at these lists. With time, I realized time and time again that few things were that important to take a spot on her to-do list.

An All-Rounder: I have spoken about mum's family life, social and spiritual life. I have not talked about the boss-lady and juggler. Mum is an entrepreneur. Thinking back now, it's hard to dissociate mum from the business world. Over time, she has become a resource person, dishing out financial and business advice to friends and families. I also noticed that she could be quite shrewd with certain business decisions. Even with this, mum still makes out time to head community and social projects. She just seemed to have eternal energy, doing a lot of these things effortlessly. To state the obvious, I am not mum. I have gained some of these qualities through genetics and "apprenticeship". Many cheers to the boss lady!!