MY ETERNAL HERO

Dear Dad.,

It has been twenty years since you passed away. Did time heal my grief and emptiness? It did not. Instead, I had been feeling really guilty not being able to express myself when I had a chance. I picked up three colours to portray our relationship. These main colours created a beautiful rainbow between me and you, sharing a special BOND between us.

WHITE (PURITY)

White always represented a PURITY to me. It is the colour that describes your character. Although you were not our biological father (me and my brother) you have always been a strong pillar in my life with the things you did and the love you showed me. You gave me a wonderful life and nurtured me at every step of the way, giving me an excellent education, advice and a home to grow up into the man I am today. What I and maybe you, did not realise at the time was you were a great model to me. You waited for me to finish my university studies (my master degree) before you express your feeling to adopt us. I won't forget the expression you used at the time I quote " Now you finished your studies and started working financially you are independent and you do not need me anymore, I like to adopt you as my sons, if you accept I shall be honoured," You asked us. We accepted your proposal with pleasure. That night in my bedroom I was crying quietly, tears were for my happiness and my gratitude to my new father I was 27 years old. Up to that time, I was calling you "Abi" in my mother language meant 'elder brother'. To call you DAD in the morning was a great pleasure. In the 1950s in my motherland country, men and women living together without marriage were unacceptable. My mother was called 'misteress'. Normally she and we would have been outcasts of society but you have belonged to a family with etiquette, richness and power ( one of the very old industrial and wealthy) of the town, We were untouchables in that respect. Still. being difficult days for me you showed endless love and support to carry on with my life regardless of social obstacles. It was not only being young but as my nature, I was a handful, difficult to control child, maybe a rebel. Those days you overlooked my mistakes and give me support whenever I needed it. It was your patience and seeing in best in me when others couldn't. I remember your saying to me " I dropped out of school at fifteen, I did not know the importance of education instead I chased your mother the most beautiful woman in the town and got her at the end but knowing now education is important I shall make it sure you will finish yours that I promise,". Not only I had graduated from university with BSc I also got my master degree in my present native country now. It was the result of your guidance, inspiration and support that made me achieve it.

You were a unique person. Today, I could have called you Philanthropist. You and mum could have your own child but you did not. From the first day, I met you ( I was five years old) we had a bond difficult to describe at the moment may be called, LOVE. You were inside out the same person and your word was your promise you never broke. To me, you were a white knight who saved my life. For others, they called you an angel, a WHITE angel.

GREEN (WISDOM)

It is a colour representing forests, grasslands, deep oceans meaning endless wilderness representing RESPECT and POWER. It was your university of life philosophy, social understanding of human beings that made you different from others. People called you 'one in a million with your heart and wisdom'. It was not only charitable work you were providing the society such as financial aid to orphanage pupils to help them with their education but also there to help them to live a normal life. You were very discreet nobody knew till those you helped spread the word. All these memories we lived together attached to my heart and will never forget them. You were an inspiration to me. The way you speak to the people treat them and comfort their lives is very difficult to describe especially nowadays with the present state of the world. Although you were from a wealthy class you broke the barriers to reaching others, somehow you were blessed with your vision and wisdom. Your hands stretched out to people who needed help with their lives. Those are qualities no school, college briefly education can teach you It was just in you. You gave your love unselfishly and shared your fortune with other less fortunate people. You were a mentor at the time. When you made difference in peoples lives by advising, sponsoring, teaching, helping and being their confidante you opened many doors for them. You created relationships with needy people providing knowledge and connections to them to solve their problems. The way I am describing your wisdom proves that you brought me up as the best version of yourself. In due course due to the circumstances, I had to move and take my residency in my present country. My marriage was shaky at the time you supported it saying that " I am always with you and will support you financially and mentally. Your marriage difficulties will end one day and you will have happiness with your children. 4000 miles is not a distance to worry about a few hours of flight time we will be together and I shall be at the end of the telephone line you will be able to reach me anytime. Finally, I hope one day you will thank me for my advice," He expressed his wish and I took his advice. I am thankful to you, today.

RED (HERO)

RED colour represents you as my HERO. At the time, I was in my teenage year's my social situation, was against all the rules and regulations of society. My mum was famous for her beauty but she was also a rebel. She did not mind living with you without papers. She was in love with you, the important thing was your support as she was not accepted by your family but you made everybody respect her. To me, you were my dad could not call you at the time but in my heart, you were more than my biological father. I never heard from him after I started living with you. I was just happy to have you in my life. It was not material things at the time you provided me it was your guidance through my life, pushing me to achieve what I want and giving me the freedom to explore and express myself and be courageous not to be afraid of anybody. I was really honoured, blessed and lucky to have the chance to be part of your life.

You were always dressed very smart. I used to call you an English gentleman with your spotless outfits. I also think you were a very handsome man. Beauty inside you was shining through your eyes, at your smiling, in your voice at talking and body language reflected your warmth to the people. You were respected. I was a very proud and envious boy. Without realising you moulded me a good person to be a good father to my own children.

The difficulty was Birthdays. Actually, you did not have a birthday as such. You were registered but I never saw your certificate. It was only 'Fathers Day' I was getting presents for you. The difficulty was you had everything in your life, choosing a present was hard, mum was not helpful either. The only thing that was important to me was to express my feelings by writing on your card. You knew and understood me.

" Life is a war. It will be full of battles. As soon as you can stand and walk on your feet you will face them. Be brave to fight. You might win or lose but don't be afraid. They are part of our life experiences just remember and learned from them. One way another, one day everybody's war ends even if you lose you are still a winner to live that experience. That is called perseverance, never give up," You advised and I still keep it.

The RED colour is to show the passion you had in your life. Your kindness to the people, approach to their problems with the sense of humour to put their worries to ease was your outstanding character.

It was a fate later in my life to become blessed with being part of your life and your son. There are things in life one may have difficulty repaying. I am in that situation. No words are enough to express my gratitude to you. I can only thank you from bottom of my heart for giving to me so many beautiful memories to live with. I hope to pass them on to my children.

Today, I am telling the world that you were an amazing father who made me what I am today. I am very proud of you. To show love to your dearest is sometimes the most difficult job in the world. Even if it is late, It is the opportunity for me to say to you,

"YOU ARE MY ETERNAL HERO"

I love you DAD.

Your Son,

NOTE: I would like to express my thanks to Zaks Heuskaya from PEXEL for the lovely picture.